OnLine dating: finding friends and problems there of

The anger is a huge red flag.

Odds on he’s hiding something, probably a wife or a long-term partner or playing the field. He can only keep the mask on for so long before his own guilt and self-loathing about what he’s doing comes to the fore.

Don’t make excuses for him or blame yourself for his poor behaviour. This has no future. Shut it down.

What an interesting post!

I will just answer your final questions here:

In some ways it doesn't surprise me too much. I think we all tend to have on-line personas that don't quite much up to the people we really are.

Are you trying too hard to do what? Be someone else maybe- a better version of you? Maybe that's what your friend is trying to do too. I think you should just be honest with him.

Whether you put it to rest so to speak depends on how honest you can be, and whether he agrees with you or not. If he accepts he isn't the person he pretends to be on-line then fair enough, but you may as well converse with a robot if all you want is someone you can like.

No, you are not at fault and don't put yourself through some false guilt. You put that he was almost abusive? Who wants that?

Either keep to chatting on-line or meeting for coffee but certainly don't go shopping with him!