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Were you more emotionally attached to one parent over the other ?

(11 Posts)
TerriBull Sun 25-Oct-26 16:09:23

I suppose Harry evokes this feeling sometimes. What if I'd lost my most favoured parent as a child, in my case that would have been my mother. Looking back I loved her much more than my father who was quite emotionally detached and I think hell, if I'd lost my mother as a young child and had to have relied on him to raise me, I'd have ended up a basket case. Even as an adult my mum was my lynch pin. How do you think you would have turned out if that much loved parent or even grandparent had suddenly disappeared from your early life, would it have had a catastrophic effect? Or maybe both bestowed their love equally or maybe neither did.

Oreo Sun 25-Oct-26 16:12:28

I bet most girls and boys would choose their Mum wouldn’t they if push came to shove.
Many lose their Mums when they’re young and tho it’s a great sadness most come through it and don’t regard themselves as poor victims for the rest of their lives.

Oreo Sun 25-Oct-26 16:14:39

Paul McCartney was 11 or 12 when his Mum died. He still did well at school, had friends and learned to play the guitar and joined a band.

TerriBull Sun 25-Oct-26 16:23:13

I think I read somewhere John and Paul bonded over the loss of their mothers. John was brought up by aunt Mimi and soon after he reunited with his mother she had a fatal accident. Must have left scars. I think I read Paul was close to his father as well as his mother.

I've read a few posts on GN that would overturn the view that mother is the number one parent, not for everybody, but maybe a higher percentage.

Oreo Sun 25-Oct-26 16:26:08

I think Aunt Mimi was really his Grandma and her daughter was John’s Mum who he later got to know in his late teens?

Aveline Sun 25-Oct-26 16:26:16

Not me. The thought of anything happening to my Dad was the worst thing I could think of in my life. I still think of him every day. Also my darling Gran. Mum not so much. A strange woman really.

Oreo Sun 25-Oct-26 16:27:28

Mums are the main nurturers aren’t they? I know some on here had awful ones tho.

TerriBull Sun 25-Oct-26 16:28:21

Oreo

I think Aunt Mimi was really his Grandma and her daughter was John’s Mum who he later got to know in his late teens?

Oh! I didn't know that, I thought I knew everything about the Beatles too shock On a slightly similar note, I read Jack Nicholson the actor was brought up believing "his mother" was his sister

Cossy Sun 25-Oct-26 16:31:49

I was very very close to my (adoptive) father until I had a child of my own at 26, then became much closer to my mother. I remained close to both my parents throughout their lives.

TerriBull Sun 25-Oct-26 16:31:55

Oreo

Mums are the main nurturers aren’t they? I know some on here had awful ones tho.

They should be, but sometimes they aren't. Cathy Ames in East of Eden sure wasn't a nurturer. Fiction though! Although in real life not every mother fulfills that role.

Aely Sun 25-Oct-26 16:35:29

I much preferred my father. He didn't hit me round the face with his wedding ring hand. He taught me to play darts and climb trees and brought me interesting books from the library much to my mother's annoyance. She considered books a waste of time when I could be helping clean the house or do the ironing.