My best scammer wind up to date.

These responses are brilliant! The best one I ever thought up was in response to a call about my recent road traffic accident. (I don't even have a car, never have.) But I kept it going and she asked me to describe the accident. So I explained about how I had been driving along and the huge green UFO landed in the road in front of me, and these 2 reptilian aliens with tentacles got out and started bashing my car with long metal poles . . . It actually took her ages to hang up, so I kept making the story sillier and sillier, to the point where Superman arrived . . . That did it and she finally ended the call.

I had a call from sky last week saying that I had a fault on my line & they could fix it . ( I’m not with sky ) I told them I’m really glad you have called because my internet has been okaying you so much that I wish to cancel my sky . They put the phone down in me ?

Marydoll

Many of the scammers are based in Calcutta, India. Some even work from their own homes.
I love to read about the scammers being sophisticatedly scammed in reverse by clever IT specialists.
Their web cams are hacked, their faces shown, all their files deleted or even better, their computers having viruses installed remotely and rendered unusable.

Wow, I'd love to be techie enough to do that to them!

I got a call yesterday telling me that the warranty on my washing machine had expired.... and could they sell me a new insurance policy for it. Soon backtracked when they found that I’d had it for 15 years and my aunty had previously passed it on to me ) They couldn’t get off the phone fast enough !

I love winding up scammers on the phone if I have the time. They usually start by asking me how I am, so I tell them all about my aches and pains, my husband's aches and pains, next doors dog with its aches and pains, etc, etc. the longest has been well over an hour

My favourite, on being told I'd won a mobile phone, was to exclaim "excellent, I need a mobile home". The callers frustration as I kept the pretence of winning a new mobile home was the most enjoyable experience!! I kept telling them to speak up as I'm deaf and when were they bringing it to me, shall I buy a new car to tow it, where will I keep it, can I put a washing machine in it, can I have a garage built to house it, what colour is it and is it like my friend Mabels mobile home?!!
I kept this up for 10 minutes until they put the phone down on me - I wonder why?!

I love what you have said to them,Vampire Queen and others.I'll have to think of things to say,I tend to say thank you very much for calling me to see how I am,very kind,and I'm not even a customer of yours,Bye.It's the automated voices that I dislike the most,they can sound a bit menacing,I can see why people do as they ask,I never do.

This is a great one from Joe Lycett.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=68nM9CMO1HE

I often get recorded messages from BT, National Insurance Amazon - they all get the same treatment, I leave them to listen to the TV so they can't bother anyone else!!

Love it Vampirequeen!
I had a new scam yesterday saying that I needed to pay to renew the extended warranty on my washing machine. It is 7 years old and we have never paid for an extended warranty. The caller couldn’t tell me my name, address or what make my machine was. She ignored those questions and just kept telling me about the costs of repairs etc.
Usually it is allegedly “Microsoft” calling about a fault on my computer. If I have nothing better to do I play them along for a while. When I get bored I say that they should contact the owner of the computer - the Metropolitan Police (blatant lie!).
Usually just a moment’s silence and then a hang up.
Such fun !

It can work the other way round. I once had a call in the middle of the night from someoneobviously in another country telling me my phone had been disconnected. I had to think about that - after all I had been woken in the middle of the night - then queried how he could be speaking to me on a disconnected phone. There was a lot of noise in the background so I asked if they were having a party. The reply was 'Oh ma'am that's the cows in the street. They are so loud.' Amusing nowbut not in the middle of the night when you assume a phone call is an emergency. The best I could do was get the number barred. I thoroughly approve of wasting the time of cold callers who struggle to deviate from their script.

This is hilarious. I normally hang up, but maybe it's time for some fun with these eejits.

I have also had to answer questions when withdrawing a large amount from my bank. However, they were in no way condescending and treating me like a doddery old woman. I was glad they were concerned I wasn't being scammed.

Far north I did not phone the fraud department until I looked online to get the number . I would never phone anyone unknown without researching first.

FarNorth, I had an automated phone call from my bank's Fraud Team to say that there had been an unusual transaction on my account and to press '1' to be put through.

I disconnected the call and rang the number given on my credit card using another phone. It took ages to get through to the Fraud Team and I went through a whole series of security questions.

The outcome was that the original call had been genuine and my card had to be replaced.

However, firstly I had already spotted a strange transaction by checking my account online (a definite advantage of online banking). So knew there really was a problem.

Secondly, I complained to the Fraud Team that being asked to press '1' to be transferred to them on the original call from them was a stupid idea!

I turned on my phone to find a text from the bank to phone the fraud department

And probably giving the number to phone, as I've had in the past.

So then we are more likely to fall for a scam saying the same thing.

I do understand why people get annoyed at going through what must feel like an inquisition when trying to withdraw large amounts from their accounts. But there have been so many cases of elderly, confused people being targeted by scammers, often being escorted to their banks to withdraw thousands to have completely unnecessary work done to their houses - loose slates, dodgy wiring and so on. They pay the money upfront and never see these so called 'workmen' again.

So all in all, I'm quite grateful that the banks are going the extra mile to protect people's money and make sure they're not victims of fraud.

A friend of mine tried to withdraw a large amount of money from her account after she retired as her daughter needed helping out. She got the third degree from her bank about what this money was going to be used for, did she know this person etc, the usual 'are you sure you know what you're doing because you're getting on a bit' stuff. In the end and out of sheer annoyance she said was going to the casino to play on the roulette tables and did they want her to place a bet for them. They never asked again.

A similar thing happened to me, Floradora. I went into the bank to pay off my mortgage. The mortgage was with that bank and the money was sitting in my account which was with that bank. there was also a paper trail for where the money had come from.
I had brought all sorts of ID but the teller refused to accept it, as I had foolishly forgotten my passport. I pleaded and pleaded, as it was Saturday and I wouldn't have had time to back for it before the bank closed at lunchtime.

Out came the manager, who came over to speak to me. Much to my relief, the teller backed off, when the manager said her family and ours were close friends and I was certainly no money launderer.

not a scam phone call but this really drove me mad. We decided to give both our children a few grand as they are both moving house . DD's went through fine as she was already in my database on internet banking . My son wanted the cash to go in a new account so I set this up using a card reader and the bank agreed his details were correct. Fast forward a few days I turned on my phone to find a text from the bank to phone the fraud department . I did this was was given the third degree as to whether is was a scam . How did I know this person ? Well he has the same name as my DH who is also on my account . How did I get the account details ? Well DS told me. This went on and on until I persuaded the chap it was fine . Sadly with the few days that had elapsed the payment was returned to me so the next day I tried again. Once again it was blocked and I spoke to three different departments the last being a call centre in India . This lady was horrible and said she would not allow it to go through until I told her what the money was for . At this I totally lost it and , hamming it up a bit , I pretended to cry .At this she said she had put it through. I felt like a criminal and to make matters worse they could see it was a staff account . I know people get scammed but try persuading someone you know what they are doing . I put in a complain to the CEO but the reply was as uncaring as the treatment I had had. Moral of this is if you are transferring a sisable amout of money to a new account speak to the fraud department first.

We don't get any of these calls now because we've had a BT call monitoring phone for several years. It intercepts calls and asks the caller who they are and we have to accept the call before it's connected.

Perversely, though, I do miss the scam calls - I used to have such fun with them

He's maybe trying not to be too obvious.

vampirequeen
I never thought of that. a Q is 10 and an X only 8.
Should I be wary?

If I have accidentally answered the phone to one and haven’t got much time I say hang on while I put you on loud speaker, and shout put the kettle on Zara we’ve got another one then leave the phone off the hook while the “dog” barks all goes silent then whisper, have you started the tracker. Or something similar depending on how much I remember of my best efforts so far. However as someone pointed out they are spoiling it with recorded messages these days. Often with an American voice. Plus I saw that they are not from so far away anymore.

Grammaretto

When Sky were at their peak, advertising with constant cold calling I got really cross with this poor guy and harangued him with "Why don't you get a proper job"
He replied that he was a student and couldn't get any other job to pay his expenses. Did I really think he wanted to be doing this for a living. I was contrite.
But I guess a sales call is not the same as a scam calls, which can be horrible
I have just had a marriage proposal from the random person I am playing scrabble with - online! Shall I accept?

Make sure your romantic proposer isn't only after you for your X?