OK, it's probably been said before, BUT..

I think some posters take things too personally when others see no real offence.
I think that to me means they have a rather inflated idea of their own self importance.
This is not, repeat not, intended to point the finger at anyone personally at the current time, just an observation of things I have noticed throughout my time with GN.
Some would just say,lighten up, shrug it off and ignore the deliberately obnoxious posters. Like death and taxes they will always be with us.

With you Phoenix. There's been several threads lately where nit picking nastiness has taken over from heated discussion. Even when the discussion ignores it and carries on two or three will continue to slag each other viciously. And when it happens on a light thread like yours....

Does ignoring always work on the internet? I dont think so.

I think I may have found the 'contentiousness' in question (after your last post, P). I think it could have been ignored, especially by someone with a 'prehistoric' association with Gransnet

What I dislike about threads like this is the mysteriousness. Oblique references are made to whatever the OP has seen as the problem. Most of us haven't a clue what the opening post is on about. Well, we have a vague idea, but we don't know what in particular occasioned the objection in the opening post. That's annoying.

Those of us who wish to start threads like this need, I suggest (and the suggestion is aimed at me too), to find a way of making our complaints unmysterious.

And then threads like this would get reported and deleted pronto. Hey! I think I'm onto something here

That wasn't the case here though Absent.

I am just waiting – but not with bated breath – for this thread, like all the many others on this subject in the past, to degenerate into a nasty sniping match. It always happens – but maybe this one will be the exception.

I agree that there is no excuse, let alone justification for being aggressively rude to another gransnetter but it does happen. What also happens is that some gransnetters occasionally complain that someone was aggressively rude to them when all they did was disagree with what was said in a post.

Elegran - good posts as usual.

Durham, just a bit of nonsense started on 9th, under "Ask a Gran", having deliberately avoided AIBU

Which thread was that, then,phoenix?

Spot on Jalima, a recent thread was a good example of this, hence this one!

Did I miss something? I didn't spot anything angry yet, perhaps I am just oblivious

I agree with Ana. If we were all just 'nice' GN would soon finish.
I like it as it is and if some threads get heated then don't read them.
I don't think phoenix said that though Margaret
I read the OP as saying that some threads do get heated and contentious, that is to be expected on politics etc, but that others are supposed to be lighthearted, a bit of fun to brighten our day, and that sometimes someone may come on and start being rather contentious on those for no reason whatsoever.

There will always be some posters who regularly do personal sniping. They enjoy it - especially if they themselves think they were got at on some thread or other. Some posters have very long memories. And cant stand being patronised.

gillybob I have no problem with a difference of opinion, bring it on, in fact reading other people's people's opinion on here has given much food for thought and has on occasion made me totally re think some things, but personal sniping is another matter.

We are a giant melting pot of people. Why would we all think the same?

We are not robots. We are not all in the same financial situation. We do not live the same lives , some of us are retired, others are not, some have grandchildren, others might not, some support one political party, others support a different one and some none at all. We are Christians, non Christians, vegans, veggies, straight, gay or crikey knows (or cares) what's else.

Why would there not be a difference if opinion?

As long as we all respect each other. all around.

thatbags improvemnet on the tea or on the quality of debate/postings?

It has been said before a lot. It doesn't make a blind bit of difference so I wonder why it is said.

I like the bits about the vicar. Ouch! That could be painful!

And I rather like a cucumber sandwich once in a while though I can, and do, go years without eating cucumber. The best I ever ate was some from my neighbour's greenhouse. I was watering stuff while she was away and she said help yourself. That sort of cucumber I would eat more often but most of the stuff from shops is tasteless.

Has anyone tried coconut oil or coconut cream in green tea? It's supposed to effect an improvement.

Not bother Ana, I can't stand cucumber anyway

(Now dons tin helmet and takes up defensive position under the kitchen table to await the well drilled troops of the pro cucumber militia)

Oh Durhamjen, I didn't mean to imply "permission", perhaps my post was clumsily constructed!

Elegran, 2 well put posts, (I thought so, anyway) love the "spilling tea on the vicar" bit!

Blimey phoenix, so sorry if I've annoyed you!

Argue the point/opinion not the person. Don't nit pick or refer back to something a poster said 3 months ago! Simples!

Yes, Ana, of course you are right about threads getting heated or even nasty (and have completely taken on board your reference to my practically prehistoric membership,although not entirely sure of it's relevance in this context).

No way should GN turn into a Vicar's tea party, and not entirely sure why you think that's what I meant, definitely would rather have a bit of cut and thrust, than than a crust off cucumber sandwich any day, just meant that on some threads, some posts, comments or remarks seem to be personal attacks, rather than any form of debate or argument (argument as opposed to row!)

Isn't that why gransnet cafe was started?
Non-confrontational?

Good to know we have permission to be contentious on the politics threads.

If the threads are heated because of differences of opinion, that is fair enough, but not if someone is spiteful in a non-controversial discussion because that is what they enjoy.