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Helping a family member buy their first home - your questions answered

(81 Posts)

GNHQ have commented on this thread. Read here.

LibbyGransnet (GNHQ) Mon 12-Jul-21 09:04:21

This Q&A is now complete - there will be no further answers posted.

Lending or gifting money to family doesn’t come without challenges - it’s a big commitment for both you and them. If you’re thinking of taking the step to help a loved one get onto the property ladder, and you have a question about how it might affect your future plans, this is your chance to ask the experts.

The experts:
Graham Sellar, Head of Mortgage Development, Santander - Graham has more than 30 years of experience working in financial services, and has been a mortgage specialist at Santander since 1996. He is regularly quoted as an expert voice in the media on all things mortgage related.

Hayley Burton, Financial Planning, Santander - Hayley has 25 years of experience in retail banking and 6 years’ experience in the wealth area, where she leads teams across the UK who provide expert, trusted investment and protection advice to customers based on their individual needs and to achieve their financial goals. Hayley is also a Mum and Step Mum to three children aged between 11-16, and so she’s regularly thinking of ways to help her children financially in the future.

Linda Murray, Regional Manager, Santander - Linda has worked in banking for 35 years across a broad spectrum of areas including mortgages, risk and most recently face to face banking in Santander branches. At work, she’s particularly passionate about supporting customers to help them make informed choices about their banking. Linda is also a single mum to her 24 year old daughter, Charlotte. She’s looking to support Charlotte financially and emotionally when she buys her first home.

Do you have questions around what to consider when deciding to help loved ones? Or perhaps you’d like to know more about what help you could provide (financial and non-financial)? And if you do help with a gift, loan or early inheritance, would it have an implication on your own future? The Santander experts are here to help and will be back to answer some of your questions between 26 July and 6 August.

All who post a question (regardless of whether it is answered or not) will be entered into a prize draw where one GNer will win a £200 voucher for the store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck!


Insight Terms and Conditions apply

Coolgran65 Fri 20-Aug-21 15:03:03

We gifted our son the deposit for his house. Signed papers to say it was a gift. We could ill afford it and both he and his ex agreed that if they ever sold the house and had decent equity they would give us the money back. The house was in joint names with.his partner. They later parted and there was equity in the house. His partner got half equity which included the deposit we gave our son. She refused to give back the half of the deposit. Legally, although not morally, she was entitled to half of the deposit. W should have had something signed that the gift was to our son and that should they part she would have no claim on that sum.
All credit to our son, he gave us back his half of the deposit but his ex refused to do so.

pinkjj27 Fri 20-Aug-21 18:43:22

I helped both my girls and one grandson then my husband died and left me in a different position.
I now have 7 more grand kids and three older ones are now at that age and they and my daughters have taken it for granted that I will help to the same level.
It is going to be possible and the need among them isn’t equal either. This is causing conflict and a lot of stress for me. My youngster daughter is actually not speaking to me. How can I fix this?

Nana49 Fri 20-Aug-21 21:35:29

Santander, Is this a good idea? :
We have remortgaged part of our property to purchase a small house, the equity in the 2nd property we hope will help our daughter and any grandchildren purchase a property in the future, we are thinking that the equity in the 2nd property will increase in a few years and we can then sell and there will be hopefully a deposit we can help our daughter & any granchildren out with.

Dinahmo Tue 14-Sep-21 21:53:13


It’s my understanding that if you gift a sizeable amount to a son or daughter etc but then pass away within 7 years of gifting it that they then would be liable for inheritance tax. Some sort of tax always seems to get you one way or another!

It's a sliding scale. The closer you are to surviving the 7 year period, the less IHT. It also depends upon the size of your estate, other gifts and the other beneficiaries. Gifts to charities are exempt and so reduce the taxable amount.

Theromented Tue 28-Sep-21 15:08:16

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