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What are your tips for meeting new people and making new friends? £200 voucher to be won

(116 Posts)
IzzyGransnet (GNHQ) Tue 19-Apr-22 12:39:14

This sponsored discussion is now closed. Thank you to everyone who posted below.

Created for Ourtime

Building new friendships later in life can be challenging but extremely rewarding. Whether it’s a simple tip or life changing advice, we would like to hear how you have met new people and made new friends.

Have you found confidence in retirement or later life and taken up a new hobby? Perhaps you’ve joined a club and found new friends through a shared interest? Or maybe you have recently started dating again and you can share with us your ways of meeting a potential partner? Whatever it is, share it on the thread below - you might even help someone else in the Gransnet community.

- Post your advice on the thread below to be entered into a prize draw
- One lucky GNer will win a £200 voucher for a store of their choice

Here’s what Ourtime’s in-house dating expert, Kate Taylor has to say:

“Over-50s have so much experience in meeting and talking to new people, but still, many of us have a fear of the unknown around making new connections and starting over.

If you feel nervous about meeting new people or dating again, take it slowly – you can use a site like Ourtime to chat and meet with likeminded people, and you’ll quickly realise that you never lost your power to connect, laugh, or flirt.”

Thanks and good luck with the prize draw!

GNHQ

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libra10 Wed 27-Apr-22 18:51:15

If you're an animal lover, think of adopting a rescue dog.

Since owning our own dog, while out walking him I've made so many new friends. Each day I chat to people out walking their dogs, and we have met up for coffee and lunch at each others' homes.

We have become a real community now, and it's a great way to meet like-minded people.

Sararose Wed 27-Apr-22 19:05:31

I too recommend joining the U3A and thus meeting people with similar interests to yourself. I also suggest finding out about Inner Wheel which is friendship club for ladies who also raise money for a variety of charities. If you are active then joining a gym or attending zumba classes can lead to long lasting friendships. I first met a very good friend at the gym and persuaded her to join the U3A and she persuaded me to join Inner Wheel.

fionalsutherland Wed 27-Apr-22 20:58:07

I think the best way of meeting people is getting out and about in your local area especially if you have a grandchild to take to the park or a dog to take a walk, they are amazing ice breakers & help conversations to begin naturally with people who you would likely otherwise never get chatting to. Joining a local walking club or run group where there’s a common interest to bond people together & start conversations & friendships is another good option.

boat Wed 27-Apr-22 21:54:22

This won't work in cities or big towns, only where there is sparse public transport.
Sit at a bus stop where it is at least an hour to the next bus. It's surprising how many people will talk to you.
Make it a habit and you soon get to know people.

SuzC Thu 28-Apr-22 11:08:49

I have made wonderful friends just out dog walking - smile and the chats will follow. I've also found my local leisure centre a good place to make friends - chat to people in the gym and also at regular exercise classes. Volunteering is an excellent option too - win/win.

Kittyme1 Thu 28-Apr-22 15:24:30

I too have made some lovely friends whilst taking our dog to the park for a walk, so much so we have formed a walking group for dog owners. Our mission is to visit a new park every week.

Vintagejazz Thu 28-Apr-22 16:45:03

Get involved in your local am dram group. You don't have to be a good actor. They also need people who are good at techy stuff, people to help with sound and lighting, costumes, prompting, helping out backstage, PR, sourcing props etc etc.
Everyone's skills and talents or just help are appreciated and if you want to tread the boards there's usually background and walk on parts.
You will meet some very talented and creative people, and also people who just enjoy the community aspect and being involved.

Goldbeater1 Thu 28-Apr-22 23:11:24

We migrated to Australia in our sixties and found new friends by joining local social groups, joining a local quiz night, being prepared to chat to anyone, introducing ourselves to the neighbours by way of an invitation to come for a drink and nibbles, and by refusing to be discouraged. We were lucky enough to have nice neighbours to start us off!

noahsark Fri 29-Apr-22 08:17:15

You need to be open to make new friendships. By that I mean a smile or pass the time of day with someone. Even just sitting on a bench in the park, strike up a conversation. It’s amazing how quickly friendships can be formed. If you’re able to join a local gym you will find others like you. Potential friends are everywhere if we are open to them.

geo44geo Sat 30-Apr-22 11:32:43

I joined a cross stitch club.And made lots off friends.

Holidayenthusiast Sat 30-Apr-22 11:40:52

I have met more people while walking my dog than I did in the previous 30 years at my current address. Getting a dog may not be a solution for everyone but it is a very sociable activity.

katynana Sat 30-Apr-22 13:55:51

Moving to Wales on retirement enabled me to make new friends via language lessons. A few of us meet up once a month for lunch and a good natter. I also volunteer at my local library where I have found another group of lovely people. My husband, who is not a 'joiner' by inclination, was persuaded to try indoor bowls which he loves and has made friends whom I don't know personally and has , since, joined the local U3A and is going dancing with other people (not me, I have 'dicky' knee) monthly and thoroughly enjoying himself. I am so pleased with his new-found activities because I did worry, slightly, about how he would cope if I were to pre-decease him. Not, of course, that either of us going anywhere as far as we know. grin

Samiejb Sat 30-Apr-22 14:16:53

For those of us who might find it difficult to go to a ‘club’ for the first time - how about just going for a walk. Since lock down I’ve been walking regularly and there are always people who say ‘hello’ and this can sometimes break into conversations. This can be a simple way of gaining confidence with strangers and who knows how it might develop.

Fernbergien Sat 30-Apr-22 14:19:32

After moving some 25+ years ago I joined two Arthritis Groups. One was very welcoming and I enjoyed that. The other was cliquey and I was treated as the new girl all the time..They thought they were posh. I did a lot for both but it was not “ seen” by the second group. Helped them make a lot of money. Donated a load of bric-a- brac for their sale ( stuff from mum) and sold more tickets than anyone for a do. Anyhow they closed shop soon after we returned to near where we had been before. So as someone said that there are a big difference in groups. So be selective and don’t hang around if it doesn’t seem right.

AngLev Sat 30-Apr-22 14:59:58

The most important thing when meeting new people is to be approachable and wear a smile. Listen to what they have to say and you will use instinct to suss out if you may have something in common. I met a great bunch of ladies doing aqua aerobics. We may not see each other socially but we have a coffee and catch up sometimes after the class
Most important - just be yourself!

Diane7 Sat 30-Apr-22 15:43:56

Join a Meetup group. I moved north to be near my daughter leaving a difficult marriage. I knew nobody, the group I joined are really friendly. It's not a dating site, not interested as I am enjoying my own company. We have coffee mornings, lunches, theatre visits, trips to the coast and are celebrating the Platinum Jubilee. There are a variety of Meetup groups, walking etc.

lexigran Sat 30-Apr-22 15:59:43

I joined a local women's group. It's a bit daunting walking in for the first time but through the friendly people I met there I found out about other interesting things to do in the village. E.g. yoga, badminton, community choir and volunteering at the charity shop.

wildswan16 Sat 30-Apr-22 16:26:11

Joining walking groups, choirs, charity fundraisers etc are all good ways to meet people.

But .... it then all depends on how you come across. Sometimes people can be too enthusiastic, wanting to make suggestions etc before they have really got to know the group or being too "needy". Just enjoy the group and what they are doing - take things slowly, be friendly yourself and be patient.

Some groups, unfortunately seem rather closed to newcomers, so don't be put off if things don't work out the way you would like. We can all find a place somewhere.

Echame Sat 30-Apr-22 16:53:03

If you're still fairly mobile my suggestion would be to give line-dancing a go if there's a group in your neighbourhood but if you prefer more sedentary pursuits, my tip might be the local library who often run myriad groups including photography and art clubs etc, all of which are an excellent way to socialise.

Dannydog1 Sat 30-Apr-22 17:01:07

Join a local club, or even start your own. I joined a table tennis group and after getting to know them, a few of us started. Knitting club- although my partner calls it a natter club!

HappyNan1 Sat 30-Apr-22 19:08:31

Just one tip. Wherever you go hoping to meet new people. SMILE ?

StoneofDestiny Sat 30-Apr-22 22:24:27

Walking groups. Amateur Dramatics Group. Volunteering wherever opportunities arise.

Zoejory Sat 30-Apr-22 22:27:08

Definitely get a dog if at all possible. And obviously not just for making friends. But I've had dogs for years and have numerous friends due to meeting people walking their furry friends.

cathisherwood Sat 30-Apr-22 22:27:52

Find a local walking group. I walk with a local walking for health group and with ramblers. People will usually make sure new members and visitors get chatted with and there is often a visit to the local tea shop at the end

wallers5 Sun 01-May-22 07:28:13

I missed my friends badly when I moved from Sussex to Devon. Luckily I had small Grandkids to take to a Playgroup. although younger mothers they were kind & full, of advice about things to do.
I then joined a Pilates class & an Aqua gym with plenty of other oldies & made some nice friends. If my Partner dies before me I will volunteer at Cotehele NT.