Preferring to stay at home

I am like the OP - I prefer to stay at home.
I had a weekend away in Canterbury - my dear friend wanted to see the Cathedral (on her bucket list). Her lovely son decided to take her there and invited me to keep his mother company. Very sweet of him, but it was almost 5 and a half hours. Poor boy - I was shattered , so I can’t imagine how tired he must have been. No more such trips. It was all the more stressful because I suffer from IBS.
The maximum I will do is about 2 hours and if it was to visit something extra special.
Been on holidays, cruises etc. Have no desire for any more foreign travel.

I was on a plane yesterday. Saw the pilot and he was wearing enormous glasses. I had the feeling he would be a speedy merchant. Take off seemed to be at a great speed. Landing was so fast and felt a big bump. I love flying and have flown a Piper so get the basics. I agree with the airport nonsense. Such a hassle but I’m not ready to give up yet. My first flight was aged 11 on BOAC stopping at Bermuda, Antigua, Barbados and our final destination of Trinidad. Back in the day we were allowed off the plane for a drink in the terminal.

Norah

M0nica

Primrose53

I looked briefly at cruises but read a lot of reviews where they said staff on the cruise ships pick and choose who and when they assist with wheelchairs etc.

In which case try a river cruise and choose one of the smaller boats. We had several people on our cruise with wheelchairs or buggies who all seemed to get all the help they needed.

Cruise ships also have far fewer decks. On our boat, there were 2 decks of cabins and the dining room and lounge were at the same broad level, but a few steps up - and there was a lift immediately adjacent to help with those few steps. DH use the lift all the time.

Indeed. Consider that which M0nica recommends.

We've enjoyed many Viking River Cruises. The boats are small, 150 to 250 people depending on choice of cruise. People with wheelchairs are well cared for. I'm able but having a weather related illness, I always get help as needed.

Elevators are near the dining space, one can also have room service.

Exiting the boat there are special ways for those who can't walk or load the bus to a tour easily - and it all appears to be magic.

Thank you both.
Will take a look.

I ve travelled a fair bit quite often on my own and used to love it I m older now and realising at 80 I m not too keen on going far away any more it’s crept up and never ceases to amaze me when I have an opportunity and down feel I want to take it

M0nica

Primrose53

I looked briefly at cruises but read a lot of reviews where they said staff on the cruise ships pick and choose who and when they assist with wheelchairs etc.

In which case try a river cruise and choose one of the smaller boats. We had several people on our cruise with wheelchairs or buggies who all seemed to get all the help they needed.

Cruise ships also have far fewer decks. On our boat, there were 2 decks of cabins and the dining room and lounge were at the same broad level, but a few steps up - and there was a lift immediately adjacent to help with those few steps. DH use the lift all the time.

Indeed. Consider that which M0nica recommends.

We've enjoyed many Viking River Cruises. The boats are small, 150 to 250 people depending on choice of cruise. People with wheelchairs are well cared for. I'm able but having a weather related illness, I always get help as needed.

Elevators are near the dining space, one can also have room service.

Exiting the boat there are special ways for those who can't walk or load the bus to a tour easily - and it all appears to be magic.

It's the airport experience that I find intolerable, except from really small local airports.
However, I flew recently with someone whose mobility is impaired and I requested assistance for them. It did make things a whole lot easier: a strong and cheerful person appeared with a wheelchair which took us through security via a special route and then to our boarding gate. As an accompanying person, I also went through with them.
It was simple and quick to arrange, and would make all the difference to anyone who struggles with that long walk through the airport.

I like the idea of travelling but the groundwork gets more daunting.
I don't know why, but a few days before going away I seem to convince myself I really don't want to go, but yet, when the journey begins I change to loving that sense of adventure again!

I agree with MOnica that sometimes we just have to make the effort in order to get the reward.

I amgoing through this at the moment as I have asked a friend to come to Europe with me in the summer. We are travelling by train and initially I got very excited about it.

Now I know I have to commit I am becoming more de-motivated to actually book it. Only because I would let my friend down is the reason I know I have to get it down.

I wish I could say it was an age thing but I think I have always been like this. I hate packing and all the stress of thinking about what I might need to take etc.

I often say I wouldlove to travel more if someone could just pick me up and take me straight there without all the other stuff beforehand.

So, I sort of but not fully understand what you mean. I haven't had a proper holiday before Covid so it's overdue.

Looking back at all the lovely places I've been makes me think I need to be making some more memories...

I am exactly the same as you Mirren I love my home, garden and the area where I live. I'm never happier than when I have no appointments in the diary and all day every day to potter with hobbies and projects.

I try to make every day special and so don't really feel the need for holidays.

Primrose53

I looked briefly at cruises but read a lot of reviews where they said staff on the cruise ships pick and choose who and when they assist with wheelchairs etc.

In which case try a river cruise and choose one of the smaller boats. We had several people on our cruise with wheelchairs or buggies who all seemed to get all the help they needed.

Cruise ships also have far fewer decks. On our boat, there were 2 decks of cabins and the dining room and lounge were at the same broad level, but a few steps up - and there was a lift immediately adjacent to help with those few steps. DH use the lift all the time.

Going away abroad on holiday is nice for the experience, although the travel to reach one's destination is a hassle - however you choose to get there.

Now that I'm approaching my 70th birthday and with health problems I feel safer holidaying in the UK - if anything goes wrong and I have to go into hospital I can eplain in English what's wrong with me and thanks to the NHS I know I'll be treated properly without a big medical bill to worry about afterwards.

I also have pets at home so would have to find boarding kennels for them were I to go away for more than one night, so it's easier and less hassle if I have a staycation instead. Thanks to my bus pass and Senior Railcard travel isn't as expensive as I'd have expected it to be.

I too prefer home. DH has Parkinsons and a bit of dementia and says he wants to go on holiday. It would involve a lot of effort on my part as he has mobility problems, and other things. We have just been to my sister's, a seven and a half drive each way for me (he doesn't drive any longer). I'm happy to do day trips but can't face hotel meals etc. We had cleaning up to do at sisters following meals. I feel a bit mean when he wants to go away but we do live in a place most people want to come to for their hols.

I completely understand, having travelled all over the world, as far as Australia, the entire American continent from Canada to Argentina and much of the lands in between, great swathes of Europe, I've developed a loathing for air travel, as much as l love to see new places, I'm honestly glad to throw what we need in the car and go somewhere beautiful here. It's not just the flying I hate, it's the palaver that goes with it. We went to Jersey last year, the flight on the Easy Jet web site was shown to be just under an hour, I was ecstatic when the pilot announced "Our flight time today will be 31 minutes" yay! no sooner up, than we were coming down. I don't think you're unusual at all OP, whatever suits you, can't be wrong, we're all different, I have a friend who didn't go anywhere much when we we're younger, but she and her oh are off to far flung places several times a year, I like the idea, but it's the getting there.

I certainly don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting to stay at home. As we age life and circumstances change.
Personally, I love travelling both abroad and in the UK, we regularly drive 300 miles to our second home. However, I do like to do it in comfort, using airport lounges, upgraded seats and breaking long car journeys at a hotel. Something that was unthinkable when the children were young.

I completely get where you are coming from, OP. I love my home and the thought of braving an airport horrifies me.

We have enjoyed lots of trips to Europe and further afield with the children but I hate flying so I am happy for trips in and around the UK now. Or staying in my lovely home.

I looked briefly at cruises but read a lot of reviews where they said staff on the cruise ships pick and choose who and when they assist with wheelchairs etc.

I really enjoy going away but now my husband is disabled due to a severe stroke we are very limited. I may book one of those large disabled friendly caravans or park homes with ramps, verandah, wide doors, large shower rooms etc. Just a mid week break to see how we get on.

I will miss going abroad but don’t feel we are quite ready for that yet.

Yes, but. One of the biggest dangers in old age is loneliness and people becoming reclusive, and, while like everyone else, I would say that the OP is perfectly normal in wanting to travel less, we do need to watch ourselves and stop ourselves withdrawing from life.

I find at times I feel I cannot to be bothered to do all sorts of things, but I give myself a sharp kick and send myself out, and when I get back I am so glad that I went to an event with other people or to see something different.

A fortnight ago we went to Holland for three days with our DD to see the tulips and visit the wonderful gardens at Keukenhof. DH and DD arranged it, I was indifferent, but when I got there I was carried away. At Keukenhof my heart sang, the beauty of the place and all the tulips, all in a woodland setting, was breath taking. stopping by the road side to walk through a field of tulips, in rows of different colours, to be suddenly overwhelmed by the scent of about an acre of closely planted hyacinths and realise that not all the bulbs were tulips - and here the larks singing above us, was just mesmerising. I am so glad we made the trip, even if I was indifferent at the start.

So, yes, if all you want to do is stay home, do so, but now and again give yourself a little push, there are many things you can do that will give quite unexpected pleasures out there - and we all need small unexpected pleasures in our life.

You sound like a contented person, Mirren. That's a good thing to be.

I couldn’t agree more. I hate sleeping anywhere but my own bed (just thinking how many people have used a hotel mattress and pillows makes my skin crawl), I don’t even like sleeping at my DD’s homes.

henetha

There's nothing wrong with you. We are all different and if you are happier at home then that is just fine.
I'm just starting to feel that way too as I'm getting pretty old now. But I've just come back from a holiday abroad with one of my granddaughters and it was wonderful. I'm glad I made the effort.
However, it's lovely that you are so content at home, so don't feel under any pressure to venture forth if you don't want to.
It's your choice.

Nice reply, and I agree.
Why would we all feel the same on this subject, I have friends who live for their holidays and friends who only want day trips and one friend who rarely goes anywhere as she’s happier at home.😃

Exactly Elowen33 We are all different.

My DH hated holidays and thought them a waste of money. I tried to take the DDs away, but in school holidays it was difficult to get him to take time off to look after his dogs - he’d let his colleagues with children take their holidays at that time! Let’s say it was an awkward situation!
Anyway, after his BinL died, I started going on holiday with my Sis-in-law, and couldn’t get enough!! After DH died in 21, I try to go away 3 or 4 times a year with her, my BF or DD2. I’m off to Cyprus this month. I plan to carry on like this, for as long as I can.

I don't understand why you would think there is something wrong with you. We all have our preferences in how we spend our lives, there is no right or wrong.

I was never very adventurous where travelling is concerned. My parents’ holidays were literally spent with my grandparents in Wales when they dropped me off there for the Summer hols, and another week when they collected me! Consequently, that was all I knew about holidays and wouldn’t have wanted to miss out on the grandparents anyway so wouldn’t have wanted to go anywhere else instead.
When I got married, our honeymoon was three very wet days in Brighton! (No money, and got married in February). We were so glad to come home.
We did have some caravan holidays with our two young daughters, which they loved, but nothing earth-shattering. Once we retired, we bought a house in France and had many successful holidays there, some with the girls and their families and many on our own. It was near enough for us to get from house to house in three to four hours (we lived on the Kent coast, near Dover port, which helped), so we regularly had three to five day breaks there. When we had our fill of that, we sold the house and had mini breaks in Paris instead. Bliss!
My husband died five years ago and I have no desire to go on holiday since. It wouldn’t be the same without him.

Me too - love being at home!

I think we should all live as we wish to and in a way that is comfortable both mentally and physically. However I’m completely the opposite. I’m lucky to live in a nice house with family and friends nearby. I love travelling though and think about holidays all the time. I love planning and preparing for the them.
For nearly 18 months DH has been too unwell to travel and I’ve really missed it more than I can say. He has improved a lot and we have booked something for July. I think he feels as I do about travelling but is now understandably a bit nervous so we shall do it all at a slow pace. Airports and other aspects of travel don’t bother us and we’ve developed an efficient packing system over the years.