Ettiquete on public transport

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I’ve just returned from the city, travelling by bus. On the outward journey, the driver had to tell a woman with a mobility aid, wanting to get on, that there was no room as the places were already taken (by three young mums travelling together with children in pushchairs). He said she would have to wait 20 minutes for the next bus. Overhearing this the mums said they were getting off at the next stop so they’d get off now and walk the rest of the way. It’s only about 300 metres to the next stop, nevertheless, I thought it very kind.

I don't know if it's the same in the rest of the country, but in London, wheelchairs are given priority. I'm not sure what a mobility aid is, but if it was a wheelchair then the woman you saw would have been given priority over a pushchair. This is usually resolved amicably by a pushchair being moved to an area by the exit where there is more room.

There was an awful instance a few months ago, on a cold, wet, day, when a woman pushing an elderly lady in a wheelchair tried to board the bus. There was no room to park the wheelchair in the allotted space as there were two prams taking up the space. Several of us tried to persuade one of the mums, not to leave the bus, but to move the pram nearer the exit where there was sufficient room, so that the lady in the wheelchair could take the space she was entitled to. Neither mum was prepared to make space for the wheelchair.
The driver spoke to the two mothers but they ignored him. He did refuse to move the bus until room was made for the wheelchair, but gave in, possibly because the two mums were so aggressive,

The end result was that the elderly lady was left in the cold and rain.

One of the mums left the bus at the next stop ..........

I was on a bus once and there was this young lad sitting in the disabled seat. A very elderly, yet sprightly lady got on and went straight up to him and said' Would you mind if grandma sat on your lap?' I have never seen anyone jump up so fast and give up his seat.

If the bus is full I often ask someone to move their bag. Frequently they will be scrolling their phone, pretending not to have noticed that other people need that seat.

I occasionally get an eye- roll (usually from a young woman) but nobody has ever refused and eye-rolls bother me not at all.

I’ve just returned from the city, travelling by bus. On the outward journey, the driver had to tell a woman with a mobility aid, wanting to get on, that there was no room as the places were already taken (by three young mums travelling together with children in pushchairs). He said she would have to wait 20 minutes for the next bus. Overhearing this the mums said they were getting off at the next stop so they’d get off now and walk the rest of the way. It’s only about 300 metres to the next stop, nevertheless, I thought it very kind.

argymargy

Oldnproud

As a child, I always stood if an adult needed my seat. As a young child, I would have sat on my mum's knee.

However, I suspect that there is less room between seats nowadays, as there is not room for my three year old dgc to sit on my lap (amd I am quite slim), and even when he was smaller it was almost impossible to get the two of us plus my shopping bag on one seat.

And then there is the safety issue - it is illegal to carry a child in a car without them being very firmly strapped into a seat, so I can see why parents don't expect them to stand up, totally unrestrained, on a bus. It is safer for healthy adults to stand than children, and I still give up my seat if someone clearly needs it more than I do - whatever their age.

On our local buses, children age five and over have to pay full fare too, so in that respect are as entitled to a seat as anyone else.

Where do you live? It’s very unusual to charge full fare for over 5’s.

Near Northampton.
Stagecoach buses,

If I am on a tube, I decline graciously saying I am getting off at the next stop.

Oreo

Of course it doesn’t help when people, after being offered a seat choose to decline it.

Why doessn't help. I hav eoffered people my seat and had it declined. I had no problem with it.

Oldnproud

As a child, I always stood if an adult needed my seat. As a young child, I would have sat on my mum's knee.

However, I suspect that there is less room between seats nowadays, as there is not room for my three year old dgc to sit on my lap (amd I am quite slim), and even when he was smaller it was almost impossible to get the two of us plus my shopping bag on one seat.

And then there is the safety issue - it is illegal to carry a child in a car without them being very firmly strapped into a seat, so I can see why parents don't expect them to stand up, totally unrestrained, on a bus. It is safer for healthy adults to stand than children, and I still give up my seat if someone clearly needs it more than I do - whatever their age.

On our local buses, children age five and over have to pay full fare too, so in that respect are as entitled to a seat as anyone else.

Where do you live? It’s very unusual to charge full fare for over 5’s.

Fallingstar

I had a similar experience when a woman thought her cake tin, presumably with cake, needed a seat, she was sitting in a priority seat at the front of the bus so I asked nicely if she would move the tin so my disabled husband could sit next to her, she huffed and puffed and indicated that there were seats further down the bus to which I replied that if my husband attempted to walk down the bus as it set off he would fall down because a stroke had left him with no balance and impaired eyesight. She moved the tin. Most people are very understanding and kind.

Stagecoach bus drivers should NOT be moving off until every passenger has taken a seat let alone just those occupying a priority seat.
I know this for a fact as a recently used the bus service rather than take the car into town. The driver clearly saw my walking sticks but chose to pull away BEFORE I was seated and caused me to overbalance. I complained to Stagecoach who confirmed the rules.

Once, having been sitting on a bus waiting for it to depart the terminus, a very flustered woman came clattering on at the last minute and stood beside me, smartyPhone in hand (they were new-ish then) and demanded "you have to move - I need to sit there or Bluetooth won't work!"

She had such an overbearing and bullying attitude (and looked like it) that I moved across the aisle. More coward me!

Whaddyaknow - Bluetooth or Bluebeard or Bluemurder, or whatever it was, refused to work. Oh, what a shame......

1 -nil to Karma I think.

Magenta8

I have always used buses a lot. I think some things are better, some worse. Most of the time my journeys are uneventful and everybody behaves themselves.

I remember when smoking was allowed in all areas, it was most unpleasant for non-smokers.

I agree that rudeness is not exclusive to any particular demographic. Some children are very badly behaved on the bus but for sheer bad manners and antisocial behaviour the adults lead the field by a long way.

Most people wait for everyone to get off first before alighting but not everybody does. I once had to fight my way past a double buggy. I always say thank you to the driver when I get off.

I once got into a disagreement with an elderly couple. I was in a double seat and the woman said rather curtly "My husband and I would like to sit there." I replied jokingly "That's fine, which one of you wants to sit on my lap?" They both turned really nasty and started shouting about how rude I was. Needless to say after that I refused to budge.

that was a good answer, I'll need to remember that one

I need a priority seat and many people give up their seat for me but they are normally able-bodied. I get cross when usually a young girl is occupying a priority seat and studiously looking at her phone. I have given up my seat if somebody comes on and appears to be in a worse state than me.

I always accept a seat graciously. It was our generation that were taught manners. The attitude now is I paid for my ticket, I deserve a seat, any seat.

You are not living in the wrong era and to be fair not all young people are rude. Unfortunatly some people young or old have been brought up lacking social skills.
It's not rocket science but some times people either don't know or grasp what being polite means.

When I was young in the fifties it was common for an elderly man to get up to give you a seat on a bus. I didn’t need it of course but didn’t want to suggest he was old so thanked him and took it.

If anyone offers me a seat (or to lift up or carry my case or whatever), I always accept graciously, give them a lovely smile and say, “Thank you, you’re very kind”. It leaves both sides feeling that the world is a nicer place.

I was travelling on a very full train in London with my 8 year old granddaughter, I got a seat next to a man about 30 years old, my granddaughter stood by my side. The young man offered my granddaughter his seat. I thanked him but declined, but what lovely manners.

As a child I was brought up to always give up my seat. My GC always have car journey with parents so have never learnt public transport etiquette which I think is part of the problem by these days. They love it when I take them on a bus journey and now understand that they must wait to board once everyone has got off at the bus stop, give up their seat for others and they thank the driver as they get off. They also think they have magic arms because the bus stops for them when they put their arms out.

As a first former at grammar school, (1960’s), we were expected to stand to allow the sixth formers to have a seat on the public service bus, never mind the general public.

I mean, these strapping six foot 18 year old lads needed to take the weight off their feet.

😒

Upsatirs, or at the back if it was a single decker, Bluebelle.

I was made to stand for adults on buses when I was a child. However, I think that it is dangerous for a child to stand if, for instance, the driver has to break suddenly, so I give my seat up for a child. I also give my seat up to anyone who needs it more than I do, someone less mobile than I am for instance.
My public transport bugbear is people talking on mobile phones with the speaker on so that the rest of us have to listen to both sides of their boring conversations. I wouldn’t mind if their conversation contained some juicy gossip, but it never does 😡

Did nt you have to go upstairs if you were smoking on the bus ?
Amazing is it how we sat in theatres, restaurants, coaches, cinema etc smoking
I use buses a lot I don’t usually have any problems, except some people do smell bad

I was taught to give up my seat to adults and to stand and I’ve taught my DC to do the same.
I’ve experienced rudeness from all ages . I think one of the problems is that people don’t travel on public transport as much now. Plus people are in their own little world, on their phones or listening to music or a podcast . And aren’t aware of what’s going on.

Gymstagran

I always made my children and grandchildren stand for adults. But so often on the tube now the parents let the child sit and they stand.

the parents let the child sit and they stand. More fool them.

I always made my children and grandchildren stand for adults. But so often on the tube now the parents let the child sit and they stand.

As a child, I always stood if an adult needed my seat. As a young child, I would have sat on my mum's knee.

However, I suspect that there is less room between seats nowadays, as there is not room for my three year old dgc to sit on my lap (amd I am quite slim), and even when he was smaller it was almost impossible to get the two of us plus my shopping bag on one seat.

And then there is the safety issue - it is illegal to carry a child in a car without them being very firmly strapped into a seat, so I can see why parents don't expect them to stand up, totally unrestrained, on a bus. It is safer for healthy adults to stand than children, and I still give up my seat if someone clearly needs it more than I do - whatever their age.

On our local buses, children age five and over have to pay full fare too, so in that respect are as entitled to a seat as anyone else.