"This book will make you..." Q&A

It has been quite helpful and reassuring reading the messages here. I have been prone to bouts of mild depression and anxiety all my life but now feel more confident about sharing this; I used to think that it was a weakness and that I should be 'in control'. I fall asleep very, very easily but clock watch on and off all night and am always up at any time from 5 am. The only way I have coped with this is to 'embrace' these early hours and enjoy the peace and solitude while 'doing things' on the computer. Ruby Wax says that she has turned her life around by practising 'mindfulness' and I think this is an area I want to explore this year.

i'm with you MindfulGrandma and I'm offering tips about it to my son who is going through a very tricky time in his relationship with his partner. I get anxious about things sometimes, as we all do and it gets out of control and leads to depression with me (two elderly parents both with dementia living together at home and my husband and I the only carers at present) but I was on anti depressants for 14 years and have now almost come off them (awful cold turkey) so I haven't got that prop and I needed a way of coping with the anxiety and that's when I found mindfulness/meditation. Visualisation is also very good. But in bed when I can't sleep I do a breathing exercise where I imagine I breathe in through a hole in th stop of my head, take the breath right down through my body and out through the soles of my feet then inhale back up through the soles of my feet and out through the top of my head and so on. I find just doing that for a few breaths really calms me down. I got it from a mindfulness/meditation book with cd. It's a distraction technique really but makes you breathe more deeply which in itself is a physical calming tool.

Any tips like the above are very very helpful and can be life lines when you're going through stressful times. I'm open to any good ones!

I could do with one each of these books! Like others I have tried the self help books in the past but to no avail. I don't sleep (I mean REALLY don't sleep - I am often awake all night). I think this lack of sleep is probably the reason I sometimes get impatient. I have always lacked confidence and used to rely on DH when in social situations - now I am alone I have to force myself to go out otherwise I would spend the day sitting on the sofa, eating chocolates and crisps and playing around on the laptop!

So do you think I am a hopeless case, why do you think your books are any different from the other self help books I have read, and which one would you recommend? Also, why have so many different books, could you not have included all the problems in one book?

Anything to help stay asleep all night would be great. Had this problem since teenage years so have tried lots of other 'cures' but willing to try more!

Tegan. Sounds alright to me.

I can highly recommend practising Mindfulness and Meditation to help manage life's ups and downs. A glass of wine, a few olives, a fire and good book also do it for me!

I sat on the sofa last night reading my 5:2 diet book whilst drinking several glasses of wine, slept really well and woke up feeling very healthy.

Just reading the books alone could probably get you off to sleep.

hi this sounds like the change ! you can get help through your dr;
I went on hrt in my 50 s, it helped enormously, but as time marched on - various other things like the need to use loo during night, for me - having last drink by 9.30pm, and not sleeping until after 11pm solved it somewhat; but again it depends on how much one drank and what ?
do try to get some help.

These books work well alongside various exercises, for me yoga and horseriding help. Think it is good to work together on both body and soul to get the balance right.

Working full time for years and raising 4 children with all the stresses and strains like everyone else has got, I think anything that can help is welcome, I have read severel self help books and would take on board any suggestons, if they don't work you don't do it again, but sometimes they do, all good

I love those sort of books & so does my daughter. I don't sleep well, have my own worries & farming daughter's worries. Love to be enlightened.

i like the sound of these books esp the one on sleep. Have you done trials on people to see what works?

A self help book that can 'make you happy' seems a tall order. Happiness comes in so many different guises and is arguably the hardest state to achieve. How do you set about achieving happiness, and is it a continuing process?

I don't sleep well either. I go to the loo at least twice. I also get up and look out the window, or just sit at the side of the bed. I also get very anxious about stuff that should be nice. I'm worried when I have to babysit my grandchildren, in case they cry, or won't sleep, or just want their mums and dads.

I'd like a book that would help me sleep! I get off okay but wake up repeatedly through the night - not just to use the loo! I am always amazed when I look at the clock that is is just after 12, then just after 3, then 5-ish. I am normally fully awake by six o'clock which is ridiculous given that I am retired and no longer need to rise at 6.20 as I did in the old days when I worked. I seem to be worn out all day so any help sleeping would be much appreciated :-)

After ten years of a husband leaving me and 7 deaths in both families including my ex, 6 of which were various cancers, I cracked suddenly last year with anxiety. My doctor suggested cbt but the docs were so busy I couldn't get an appointment. In the end I went for Reiki even though I tend to be sceptical about parallel medicines. What do you think? It definitely helped me

I'd really like to find a book that provides a dose of oomph! I seem to be one of life's bystanders, sort-of-content to sit and watch the rest of the world having a career, a social life, hobbies, holidays etc. It's not for the lack of opportunity or resources, just a missing drive of some description. Any suggestions?

Without wishing to appear rude, there are so many books with similar themes, and so many resources on the internet, what is it that you think make your books different? Surely if tackling such issues was so simple and straightforward, we would all have sorted it all out by now.

I wondered if your "sleep" book would have any answers for me. Since I was tiny I have had bouts of what I think are called "night terrors". I eventually wake up in an extremely disturbed state after screaming and shouting. This was really embarrassing when we were staying in Centre Parks one hot Summer as I screamed the place down in the middle of the night and everyone's windows were open.Got some strange looks the next morning from our neighbours. DH used to my funny little ways,luckily!

Probably Mishap Cynical?

Hello Jessamy & Jo these are a type of book's that I would take the time to study and find interesting,up until my 40's I was "Mrs Mouse" and never used to make my presence known when in company even though I had a job that needed me to be proactive with people,just after my 40th birthday I was very ill and my world changed dramatically after this period and after becoming well again I have found that I do now involve myself with all that interests me and am not frightened in any way to get my self heard if need be,I also do not now suffer any anxiety or worry about things as I used to years ago,is this just an age thing ? or do you think it is a result of coming through my illness and a general feeling that I was lucky to come out the other side.

Nightowl - maybe this is what comes of us both having been medical social workers?

I quite like reading these sorts of books though. Not all the time of course (not quite that self-obsessed!) but I do like the idea of self-improvement. Often it's just one clear message that comes out of each of them but it's usually quite useful. I'd love the one on keeping calm. I'm a bit prone to anxiety attacks. Any tips on keeping these under control J &J? They tend to happen when I'm out at a restaurant or somewhere like that. Had to walk out on my DS's birthday dinner once which I felt awful about.

They are only £4.11 kindle version, so I have bought one to try. (suckkker?!)