So called professionals and they way they talk about clients

Not to a colleague of talking about a client but to a client was the worst thing I heard.
A 30 something couple were in the process of adoption , both professionals and comfortably off.
They agreed to take siblings from a difficult background.

At one home visit a social worker told them they were only being considered because they were doing this as they were both so overweight , otherwise they would be turned down.

I know they didn't complain at the time, they wanted the adoption to go through, I always hoped they did afterwards.

Im a Mental Health Nurse who worked in A rehabilitation project where my role was as much as a Social worker as it was as a Nurse. Our inhouse Manager regularly held staff one to one supervision sessions for senior staff, where issues with the keyworkers they were incharge of could be discussed and any action taken regards further training or disaplinaries should the need arise. Like previous posters have said, there are times where anger over a situation over rules common sense and things get said and tempers lost that are later deeply regretted.
It didnt help much when it was discovered that one manager had recruited staff more on tge fact that they were his personal friends and not on their proffesional experiance, qualifications, and personal values. This could be rather embarrasing and quite obvious sometimes during multi disaplinary meetings where junior key workers demonstrated their skills at handling a situation with proffesionalism whilst a member of the senior team blabbed out a load of rubbish that proved that they did not know what they were talking about in the slightest. One prime example was a senior saying that a recovering Schitzophrenic client was lonely because he missed speaking to the voices in his head??? The true fact was that the poor man was suicidal on admission as he was terrified of what these ' voices' where telling him to do, and it was thanks to his medication regime that he was feeling much better. This was only one example of an inceident that left me feeling very angry indeed. The manager at my next supervision session refused to do anything about this, this woman was a close friend of his. However, The clients community Social worker and CPN where far from happy, and logged a formal complaint with head office. A full investigation began, the Manager and several of his friends where dismissed for gross misconduct, the staff members that did remain where interviewed again in the presence of the company solicitor and given new contracts which were far more detailed regard proffesional conduct than the orginal ones ever where.
All this happened many years ago, the place is no longer in existance, and l have been long retired from the job l loved. The manager that was dismissed paid the ultimate price, he was having an affair with one of his posse he had employed, his wife found out, and divorced him, taking their children with her. He was also investigated by the Police, found guilty of theft and other offences whilst on duty as the manager of this establishment.

This is an open forum, threads can be reproduced on Twitter, on Facebook and in the MSM.
Unfortunately, there are some people who may make it their business to track posters, sad but true.

This remark could be regarded as 'black humour' and a way to let off steam in a closed meeting with other professionals who should be able to recognise it as a way of dealing with a stressful occupation. It should not have been repeated on an open forum.

Yes, I think you are making a big deal of it OP and to repeat it outside that meeting is, in my view, unprofessional.

Others have made a good point. ForestsLakesandMountains you assume you have the moral high ground BUT are addressing this point in public.

There is always an upwards chain of responsibility. If you have spoken to your manager before and she has not responded you have a choice.

Either, take the point that she had taken no action as a hint. YOU are being inappropriate.

OR take your complaint higher if you are really confident that you are right.

I still think however, that within a team, people need space to let off steam.

Not to mention that social work is desperately underfunded and understaffed. This may be additional pressure which is causing staff to have extra stress, resulting in difficulty coping with workload and therefore need to offload. And also that if you pursue this complaint, that will mean even greater understaffing.

If it offended you why didnt you say something?

In a closed meeting with colleagues I do not see a problem.

What I note from this scenario, is that it was the woman who was criticised for getting pregnant, not the bloke(s) who kept making her pregnant!!

As long as the remark was made in a private meeting, I can understand the sentiment.

If the remark was made in a general office situation then it should be challenged.

Because this is an open forum. Anyone could log on and read it: the person concerned, their manager, even the family in question. It would be possible to identify the people involved.
This is a matter to be dealt with privately between the op and her line manager. As a rule of thumb, if you are happy for people to overhear you on the top deck of a bus, post it online. If not, don’t post.

I’m a little puzzled. Why is it wrong to anonymously ask a question on here? What’s unprofessional about voicing an issue when nobody knows who or where the OP is? Surely that’s the point of anonymous forums? Anyone can ask any question without worrying about professionalism or discretion as there are no real details involved?
Surely, if the OP has a concern, this is the place to sound out the opinions of others who are not directly involved but who may have relevant experience or advice?

What mapleleaf said. The manager may well have challenged privately spoken to the person who miss-spoke about not using such expressions in meetings.

Riverwalk I have challenged things before at work and feel that im the only one who speaks up or discusses it with my manager and in the end this may go against me

Where does the OP say constant complaints being ignored ?

It would be highly unprofessional to reprimand a member of staff in front of his/her colleagues.
The situations has probably been dealt with.

I'm a bit worried about this post. Why would a professional come on to a grans forum to post about the inadequacies in her professional work and particularly her constant complaints being ignored? She/or He must know the proper professional process it is necessary to go through to change things. What is the OP looking for? Others to reveal professional indiscretions? Some sort of approval of the colleagues remarks? Evidence that us grans are biased?

Firstly, this is one professional you are talking about, not “some”. Secondly, what you are doing is unprofessional in talking about it on an open forum. If you are concerned you should discuss it with your line manager. Thirdly, as others have said, this could be the professional’s way of dealing with a very frustrating situation. If you have any concerns about that person’s behaviour towards clients, and you have evidence of unprofessional behaviour towards them, then again you should discuss this with your line manager. It is not a subject for an open forum.

Why is it wrong for the OP to post - there are no identifying details?

I retyped my post because the first one did not appear to post!

I am assuming it was a sign of exasperation and letting off steam with a group of colleagues who should keep things confidential too.
As long as your colleague behaves in a professional manner with her clients then let it go, certainly do not discuss your colleagues behind their backs to your manager, that is very unprofessional.

I think that posting this on the internet is wrong too.

It could have been said in frustration - you have to be quite saintly not to have such feelings when dealing with challenging clients, many of whom keep repeating mistakes and often the ones to suffer are the children.

A former colleague of Afro-Caribbean background once said to me that she 'wanted to slap' some of the young girls from her community who were coming in pregnant with their 2nd, 3rd or more child, when barely out of their teens and no permanent partner on the scene.

She was obviously not intending to do harm! But was expressing frustration that these girls should aim higher.

I don't think it was professional but expressed in a meeting with colleagues as an expression of exasperation it should remain confidential.

As long as the person concerned behaves professionally with her clients I see it as no more than letting off steam either.

In fact, I think it is unprofessional to spread this on the internet. Discussing your colleagues with your manager is just as bad if not worse imo.

Raise your concerns with your line manager
Ask for feedback
Then leave it

I would let it go. It may be a one off. Only if the colleague continued in a similar manner would I raise it.

Forests I am completely in agreement with you, it’s an appalling remark and such attitudes need to be challenged.

I was a Children & Families social worker, in the past and I still have to attend multi disciplinary Safeguarding meetings, in the course of my work. I have seen some dreadful social work practice. I did not challenge this in the meeting but raised it with a careful email to the relevant service head, afterwards.

I really do sympathise with your situation and applaud you, for not letting bad practice rest. I suggest raising it tactfully with your line manager, initially in a concise email, (if it didn’t happen too long ago).
I would hope that such actions would be welcomed and definitely should not be held against you. Good luck?

I was a social worker for part of my career - believe me I sometimes needed to let off steam! But we could do this in the context of a supportive team who understood the challenges and the need for safe spaces where they could let go of this in whatever way helped. We all supported each other and did not nit-pick about language, as we felt secure that each of us would behave in a professional manner when in face-to-face contact with clients.

Are there concerns that this worker is failing in that regard? That is what really matters.

I would have a word in private with my immediate line manager and if this is the person saying inappropriate things then I would go higher but in private. Depending on the seriousness I would get my comments down on paper dated and signed.