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Laugh and the world laughs with you

(11 Posts)
Maywalk Mon 17-May-21 20:25:07

TRUTHS

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch
the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.
................................................
GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre not the toy.
.....................................................

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
.................................................
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.
.............................................
SUCCESS:

At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 17 success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 35 success is . . having money.
At age 50 success is . . having money.
At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers license
At age 75 success is . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . not peeing in your pants.
...............................................
Pass this on to someone who could use a laugh.

Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way; BUT NEVER
forget the blessings that come each day.

Have a wonderful day with many smiles

Take the time to live!!!
Life is too short. Dance naked ????? I've never tried that, I think if I tried it now all the dogs would bark in fright.

BBbevan Mon 17-May-21 21:02:35

Thank you. ????

EllanVannin Mon 17-May-21 21:12:50

Superb gringringrin

annodomini Mon 17-May-21 22:06:25

???
Thanks for these, Maywalk. There's a lot of truth there!

Hellogirl1 Mon 17-May-21 22:11:35

I love your posts Maywalk!

muse Mon 17-May-21 22:21:46

??? thank you. Brilliant

SueDonim Mon 17-May-21 22:28:30

I still bear the scars from No 1 on the list of great truths for children! ??

JackyB Tue 18-May-21 09:31:41

I would use a "like" button here if we had one.

monk08 Tue 18-May-21 09:37:57

Loving your posts Maywalk??

Smileless2012 Tue 18-May-21 09:40:28

Great post Maywalksmile

henetha Tue 18-May-21 09:43:31

That's brilliant! Thank you for starting the day with a laugh.