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Lovely friends - not!!

(153 Posts)
lippyqueen Thu 01-Oct-20 14:41:47

On Saturday we arranged a meal here in our house with 4 local friends. My husband went to pick them up, only 3 or 4 miles away so that they could have a drink and taxi home. They all wore masks in the car.
Three quarters of the way through the evening the wife of one couple, announced that they had both had a Covid test that day because she was experiencing some symptoms. We were all extremely shocked and surprised to say the least.
They went home and then on Tuesday evening she phoned to say that the test was positive. We are so disappointed and also furious that we have been put in this position. We and the other people are all in isolation just hoping we do not get any symptoms.
These people also had a BBQ on the Sunday to which 2 more couples came. They have put 8 people at risk and their extended families. We have 9 days to go in quarantine. These people were really good (so we thought) friends and we feel very let down by them. We have no idea of how things will go forward. So far we have not been contacted by them and we are just thinking about how to handle it.

Helenlouise3 Fri 02-Oct-20 16:45:05

I do hope that these 4 people were in your bubble, otherwise regardless of whether they had symptoms or not, they shouldn't have been in your house. If they are part of your bubble then they were grossly negligent in accepting your invite.

Toadinthehole Fri 02-Oct-20 16:24:06

Marianne, start your own thread. It’s an interesting situation, and you’re bound to get help?

janeainsworth Fri 02-Oct-20 16:06:38

That’s a rather mean & judgemental comment graunty.

GrauntyHelen Fri 02-Oct-20 15:44:23

MARIANNE You clearly have apro lem with your daughter's partner and or the age gap They will probably have a better day without your unapproving presence but not going is unforgivable

ReadyMeals Fri 02-Oct-20 15:23:30

I've refused to see any of my friends since March. It's video chat only here. This account makes me feel I made the right decision.

VRH1 Fri 02-Oct-20 14:55:33

With friends like that who needs enemies. I sincerely hope no one suffers this thing called ‘long Covid’. It’s just selfish, naive, stupidity. I used to get extremely cross when people used to visit me after I’d had a baby with all manners of infections. I hope you are ok and don’t suffer any symptoms. God bless.

janeainsworth Fri 02-Oct-20 14:43:15

Lucca’?

dizzygran Fri 02-Oct-20 14:32:06

you are fully justified in being outraged and angry at these very selfish idiots. Which planet are they from. We all know the risks from this dreadful disease. Hope you are all ok. Try and get a test for yourself and husband.

Lucca Fri 02-Oct-20 14:11:11

Do I understand that the thinking is now “have a test but don’t believe the result “ ????

janeainsworth Fri 02-Oct-20 14:11:09

marrianne you’d be better to start your own thread if you want advice. People don’t read the whole thread, usually only the OP and perhaps the last one or two replies, so if you start your own, more people will see it.
Reading between the lines, it sounds as though you don’t have a very good relationship with your D’s partner anyway?
I think if I were your D, I’d be disappointed that you weren’t going, but I don’t think I’d tell my mother she was stupid, or her behaviour unforgivable. hmm

Puzzled Fri 02-Oct-20 14:07:43

The test is known to produce false positives (which errs on the side of caution). But no seems to know mwhat percentage of test results are false positives. If they do they are keeping quiet.
Butb if you analyse some of the figures announced by government, there is less cause for alarm
Today, Merseyside region was stated to have 262 positives, per 100,000 as a reason for intensifying the lockdown procedures.
Simple arithmetic says that the infection rate (assuming NO false positives) is 0.262 percent.
Which is actually pretty small.
After all, the government is "Following the science", isn't it?
So, as Corporal Jones would say "Don't panic!"

Alioop Fri 02-Oct-20 14:05:57

What on earth!!! That was so selfish of "your friends" to do that. My goodness if mine did that they wouldn't be friends much longer. Its bad enough worrying going out shops to be near people for fear of catching it, but for them to bring it to you.

cupaffull Fri 02-Oct-20 13:58:12

WOODMOUSE49

Marydoll

I have been thinking of the person coming from abroad for chemo, without quarantining.
She is planning to go and receive treatment in a situation where there are highly vulnerable patients, with compromised immune systems. She should be reported
.Who knows, she may be a symptomatic.
Our local cancer treatment unit had to close at the beginning of lockdown, due to a Covid outbreak. A nurse died.
I'm beyond words.?

The hospital will ask lots of questions prior to treatment and one is have you been out of the UK.They also take temperature.

I've just been in as an outpatient. I had to wear a mask the whole time. My treatment was carried out in room well away from all others. No one was in the waiting area. From the entrance door to treatment and out again, I met/saw only hospital staff.

The chemo patient will lie, you can be guaranteed of that!
A temperature reading is only relevant to the day it's taken....it tells us little of incubation.

cupaffull Fri 02-Oct-20 13:52:08

Oopsadaisy4

I know this isn’t a contest, however, I know of someone who is coming back into this country on Sunday, going into hospital for Chemo on Thursday and then going back to their second home abroad next weekend!

Needless to say we won’t be seeing them and I have asked their relative if she will report them, ‘oh I can’t do that’ she said ‘ * has Cancer‘ .

Oh well, that’s ok then.
Or is it just me being over sensitive or over cautious?

I'm sorry but I'm speechless at the selfishness of these people..
The person receiving chemo, could have come back 2 weeks ago, isolated to protect the NHS workers, and had their treatment safely.
Please please report this person at least to the unit they are attending so extra precautions can be taken.angry

Beanie654321 Fri 02-Oct-20 13:48:33

Not only carrying on as normal on Sunday with BBQ, how irresponsible. I miss my grand children like mad and its selfish and unresponsive people like this that is hurting others so much. Knowing they were waiting for results they should have self isolated. Im sorry but in my head it is like attempting murder as some people they may have infected will die due to their selfish attitude. I worked for 40 years as a qualified nurse and I have lost friends to others cruel disrespect. Friends I would no longer accept them as as they do not care for any one but themselves.

Greeneyedgirl Fri 02-Oct-20 13:41:56

The rules, unless in lockdown, as far as I understand, is that up to 6 friends or family, can meet, preferably outside, but inside socially distancing.

How many can socially distance 6 properly in the house for a meal? We would struggle with that so wouldn’t do so. Inside a car is even more tricky because of close proximity, so wouldn’t do that either, unless in an emergency.

It’s a matter of risk assessment for yourself am afraid, but doesn’t absolve your friends of their completely irresponsible behaviour.

Eloethan Fri 02-Oct-20 13:26:57

I would be very annoyed but perhaps your friends didn't really understand the implications of them possibly having the virus. Maybe some people think that until they have a positive result they aren't infectious. It's irrational I know but it really depends on how savvy your friends are. They surely wouldn't have risked alienating several friends if they were fully aware of what they were doing?

Hopefully, you do not contract Covid. If you don't, you may consider that your friends were merely very thoughtless. If you do, I imagine it will be much harder to forgive such thoughtlessness. I hope all remains well for you.

travelsafar Fri 02-Oct-20 13:16:14

How awful for you. Friends would not have put anymore people at risk. Please take care and hopefully you will both be well.

Paman66 Fri 02-Oct-20 12:58:19

It was a stupid thing to do but going on the actual positive result it is more than likely a false positive. The test is run through too many cycles and is picking up previous infections. Personally I wouldn’t worry unless you don’t feel well.

LovelyLady Fri 02-Oct-20 12:51:32

I agree - these are not your friends. I’d tell them they’re no longer your friends and tell them why.

earnshaw Fri 02-Oct-20 12:35:58

definitely very irresponsible , its folks like that that are prolonging this pandemic

WOODMOUSE49 Fri 02-Oct-20 12:34:35

Marydoll

I have been thinking of the person coming from abroad for chemo, without quarantining.
She is planning to go and receive treatment in a situation where there are highly vulnerable patients, with compromised immune systems. She should be reported
.Who knows, she may be a symptomatic.
Our local cancer treatment unit had to close at the beginning of lockdown, due to a Covid outbreak. A nurse died.
I'm beyond words.?

The hospital will ask lots of questions prior to treatment and one is have you been out of the UK.They also take temperature.

I've just been in as an outpatient. I had to wear a mask the whole time. My treatment was carried out in room well away from all others. No one was in the waiting area. From the entrance door to treatment and out again, I met/saw only hospital staff.

Morag65 Fri 02-Oct-20 12:28:27

I live in Scotland so nobody in the house, I though England was 6 but only 2 households, including your own. But rotten friend

Summerstorm Fri 02-Oct-20 12:22:06

Obviously you don’t live in Scotland where there is no mixing of households indoors or gardens at all, and only two household meeting in restaurants pubs etc. Have to say I do feel safer up here in Scotland

ExaltedWombat Fri 02-Oct-20 12:13:37

This the 'lockdown starts Thursday so let's have a big party Wednesday night' thinking. Follow the letter of the rules but don't THINK about them. Stupid, but very common.