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Alcohol and the elderly

(217 Posts)
Pat37 Wed 21-Feb-24 20:21:19

I am shocked that a very elderly one who lives alone has decided you only have one life and has take to drinking wine with her evening meal and what I call a liquer of an evening . She also takes medication but I don't know what . Should I be concerned ?

annsixty Wed 21-Feb-24 20:29:00

Absolutely not.
She has decided what is important to her and it isn’t living forever.
It is enjoying what time she has left.
I know of what I speak.

Madgran77 Wed 21-Feb-24 20:29:20

Its her business really and if she is very elderly she may well feel that it makes little difference and that if she enjoys it why shouldn't she drink it!

GrannyGravy13 Wed 21-Feb-24 20:32:04

Leave her alone.

Cheers 🥂

Marydoll Wed 21-Feb-24 20:37:25

She has probably decided to have some pleasure in her life. Her life, her business.

I had no alcohol for five years, afraid of what would happen, due to the large amount of medication I take. I was in hospital and my cardiologist told me not to be daft, I needed some pleasure (prognosis poor), a glass of wine wouldn't hurt.

keepingquiet Wed 21-Feb-24 20:38:22

Sounds like me- where's the Baileys?

ixion Wed 21-Feb-24 20:40:10

How are you defining elderly, Pat37?
Just curious.

Katie59 Wed 21-Feb-24 20:42:12

One glass of wine is not a problem to anyone, it’s the younger women that are drinking a bottle a day and more, that is a concern

BlueBelle Wed 21-Feb-24 20:44:48

Hahaha let’s all have a glass or two… cheers folks

Patsy70 Wed 21-Feb-24 20:46:15

Is the ‘very elderly one’ a close relative who is dependent on you for her welfare?

RosiesMaw Wed 21-Feb-24 20:46:27

I am shocked that a very elderly one who lives alone has decided you only have one life

Why, how many do you reckon we have?

wine with dinner?
Whatever next!

Sallywally1 Wed 21-Feb-24 20:47:31

I have decided to stop drinking wine, partly because of serious dieting. A bottle has 600 calories and it wasn’t doing me any good, in my opinion. Also, I didn’t like the way it made me feel.

I still intend to have a bottle of chilled lager in the garden in the summer whilst watching the sun go down. As people have said, life is too short to stop all pleasures!

NotSpaghetti Wed 21-Feb-24 20:57:40

My 99 year old mother-in-law has wine with her evening meal.
She has it most days and maybe once a week she might have a G&T before dinner.

She has checked her meds with her doctor and so long as she "doesn't overindulge" it's OK.

Don't forget, older people with circa 1940s/1950s wineglasses are basically drinking something like a port measure! The glasses are tiny.

She will also have a cointreau or something after dinner if in company but when alone I don't think she can be bothered as she sees it as a "social" thing.

My mother-in-law loves selecting wines and looks out for Waitrose's :25% off if you buy 6 bottles" offers!

I'd ask her if she'd like you to check her medication Pat37 and hopefully all will be well.
I expect she's using dainty little thimble-glasses like my lovely mother-in-law!

BlueBelle Wed 21-Feb-24 21:02:21

I can’t take this seriously ……’ a very elderly one’ 🤣🤣🤣

Georgesgran Wed 21-Feb-24 21:04:45

Shock Horror - clutching pearls!
I second the view that it’s her choice, her life. It hardly sounds like she’s on the path to alcoholism.
My DF used to have a can of Guinness with his lunch and a tot of whiskey in an evening most days of the week. He lived to be 96 with all his wits about him.
Why are you shocked Pat37 are you the Pinot Police?

1summer Wed 21-Feb-24 21:05:55

My Aunt and Uncle moved into a beautiful care home a couple of years ago. It has a bar and they can have a wine or beer with lunch and dinner.
I sometimes go to visit and have lunch with them, I am always offered a wine - but don’t as I am driving.
A lady who lives in the home and has terminal cancer, her husband owned a vineyard in France and has her own wine shipped over.
I absolutely don’t see a problem with this.

flappergirl Wed 21-Feb-24 21:37:49

Wine with her meal and a liqueur of an evening. Blimey what next, lap dancing!

Seriously, do you feel these excesses are clashing with her meds? Do you have any reason to worry about her safety? If not I would leave the "very elderly one" to enjoy her tipple.

M0nica Wed 21-Feb-24 21:39:55

Isummer that reminds me that the care home my aunt and uncle went into served a range of wines and beers with lunch.

My father lived to be 92. He lived on his own for the last 10 years after my mother died and he often had a glass of wine with his lunch and a sherry before lunch on Sunday.

SynchroSwimmer Wed 21-Feb-24 21:43:30

Our 97 year old relative was told by the hospital to increase her water intake.

She only drinks sherry and vodka!

sodapop Wed 21-Feb-24 21:43:31

How I detest these collective terms ' the elderly' or ' the disabled' we are people first and foremost who may be older or have a disability.
Good luck to the older lady who is enjoying her tipple, life is too short not to enjoy yourself.

Witzend Wed 21-Feb-24 21:45:09

Shocking! I hope you’ve given her a good talking to and told her from now on it’s cocoa. Or maybe Horlicks, if she’s behaved herself and eaten her greens.

kittylester Wed 21-Feb-24 21:45:44

I'm doomed!!

grannyqueenie Wed 21-Feb-24 22:09:34

Well said sodapop, that kind terminology is so demeaning, it’s one of my pet hates.

Doodledog Wed 21-Feb-24 22:17:42

BlueBelle

I can’t take this seriously ……’ a very elderly one’ 🤣🤣🤣

That was my immediate reaction grin.

And being 'shocked' at wine with a meal and 'liquer' of an evening. 😂

I dare say some people are more easily shocked than others.

Primrose53 Wed 21-Feb-24 22:23:59

My late MIL lived in a very posh area of a seaside town. She was in her 60s then and most of the neighbours in her cul de sac were retired and a fair bit older than her.

She was aghast at the amount of empty bottles the bin men collected every week and the old couple opposite had a fabulous house and a brand new Jag and only used it once a week to drive down the hill to buy their bootful of booze for the week. She said she didn’t understand how they could drink so much. She had to eat her words when she got so drunk after a funeral that she fell right over the settee 🤣🤣🤣

I guess you get to a point when you don’t have much to live for and a drink or ten is all that’s left.