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If Grans ruled the world...

(42 Posts)
Jane10 Sun 22-May-16 08:49:02

What would we do?
No more wars for one thing. International Grans could meet for a chat and sort things out.
Any more suggestions?

Jane10 Thu 26-May-16 09:41:20

Certainly Mildred. I think we could deploy 'Mildred's little tank' in many such situations.
Alea you're in charge of agenda setting. You've obviously got the right attitude to it!

Mildred Thu 26-May-16 09:02:33

Brilliant, I have always wanted to drive a tank through two different sets of traffic lights near where I live to discourage drivers continuing to drive through when their set of traffic lights are on red and mine on green. Do not want anyone to get hurt least of all me and my grandchildren but as a warning that they cannot ignore! Can I be a tank commando? I am 5' and very quiet and often feel I am below most people's eyeline so they would have to pay attention to me in my tank.

Alea Wed 25-May-16 09:47:06

I am imagining the agenda for PMQ
1. Apologies (new DGC to cuddle visit)
2. News (what Mrs next door has done to her nets!)
3. Latest special offers at Aldi
4. Where that nice Hillary Clinton/Angela Merkel/Christine Lagarde gets her hair done
5. Last night's TV especially that nice Monty Don
6. Questions (got any?)
7. Tea and biscuits cupcakecupcake

Sorry! grin - not very

Marmark1 Wed 25-May-16 08:58:36

Spot on Witzend.My friend left for the same reasons,One of the worst ones,you wouldn't think butter would melt,nasty old bigger.I would probably be the dogsbody.

Lilyflower Tue 24-May-16 10:43:58

The best of grans: wisdom, goodwill, patience, kindness, experience.

The worst of grans: forgetfulness, selfishness, 'stuck in the mud' ways, inappropriate speech and behaviour in public, intolerance of the young - especially young relations and in-laws.

Jane10 Tue 24-May-16 06:38:56

Fine we'll have a special committee for bossy women -that should keep them occupied. We'll give them some sort of task to fight over carry out. Meanwhile the rest of us can get on with general peace keeping activities.

Witzend Tue 24-May-16 04:20:01

I agree with Monica, too, sorry. Relatives who have put in a hell of a lot of volunteer time with small charities/orgs run largely by gran-age women have eventually left, thoroughly fed up with all the bitching, sniping, bossing and in-fighting. Unfortunately it would seem that it's often this type who wants to get on the committee and call the shots. The nice, peace-loving types are too often just the dogsbodies, seems to me.

Maggieanne Mon 23-May-16 21:36:58

If grans ruled the world....it would be perfect, full stop.

Jane10 Mon 23-May-16 17:06:43

Yes Spottsr you're in. Canada always sounds such a civilised place that I thought the Grans must be in charge already. Oh well, get recruiting.

Marmark1 Mon 23-May-16 16:37:45

Agree with Monica too.I know a couple who would put two stones to fight.

spottssr Mon 23-May-16 16:07:53

I will gladly establish the Canadian branch office. Can knit and sort out at the same time.

michellehargreaves Mon 23-May-16 13:58:16

And of course, there will always be the grans driving around in whatever is the modern equivalent of an Austin A40 with a tweed hat with a feather on the back window ledge, parking up for a "nice cup of tea," and boring other grans senseless with photos of their grandchildren.
But I agree, my friend Heather and I have always said if we were paid a modest sum of 120 GRAND EACH PER ANNUM, we could sort out everything from education to the National Elf!

Jane10 Mon 23-May-16 12:49:20

Excellent Maggiemaybe you're in. Keep practising in the meantime.

Jane10 Mon 23-May-16 12:48:12

Certainly Cherry you can be at our Bletchley Park but we may have to relocate it to GranChester. I think that renaming the Chancellor of the Exchequer the head of the Accounts dept would be good.
Of course there would be political in fighting but we would certainly be agreed on some things -the importance of GCs for example. Lots of teaching Grans around to run the Education dept. SW Grans to run the Benefits office too.

Maggiemaybe Mon 23-May-16 12:44:07

Well I'm supposed to be a financial gran, but my bean counting days are over and I've always been a sucker for buying crap on the internet- online shopping, so I'll rule myself out of that. Can I apply for expletives section basic training, Jane10? I already have a good grounding, and I also own several oversized handbags, a strong right arm and a well-rehearsed telling off face that could sink a thousand ships or a whole gang of very naughty boys.

rosesarered Mon 23-May-16 12:35:44

Agree with Monica grans are just people after all, they would be in-fighting in no time! grin Think of the Parish Hall Commitee and local Council meetings.
Game Of Thrones has nothing on them from my experience! ( I love GOT btw.)

Cherrytree59 Mon 23-May-16 11:36:05

Oops does not spend time internet shopping!

Cherrytree59 Mon 23-May-16 11:33:28

Jane could we have a Bletchley type HQ. I'm quite good at puzzles and Subterfuge (had plenty of practice).
I would love big wall map to plot our Granny patrol. wink
I think it would be for the best to leave the purse strings to a GNetter who does spend time internet shopping is up on Accounts.
As there will be No more Wars there will be no need for military department -
but we could do with plenty of grans in the Diplomatic office!!

Greyduster Mon 23-May-16 11:24:59

"Blood red and endless grey" - I like that lizzy - the books are much the same. After the first two I said I wouldn't read anymore and having been invited by DS to watch some of the series win him, I refused. I even found "The Hollow Crown" a bit graphic for my taste. Shakespeare can stand or fall on the text and good acting without gallons of blood and lopped off heads and limbs thrown into the mix!

lizzypopbottle Mon 23-May-16 11:10:59

I'd ban violence in the media. My (adult) son's been watching Game of Thrones and the gratuitous violence is a constant throughout every episode. It only has two colours; blood red and endless grey! I don't watch it but somehow I'm depressed by being in the same room with it! It was the same when he was obsessed with '24'. Give me the Great British Sewing Bee any time. At least it's creative and nobody dies a gory death!

Alea Sun 22-May-16 23:02:14

And a handbag I hope to give miscreants a proper handbagging!

Jane10 Sun 22-May-16 21:14:31

Do you want to be in the expletives section or the general sorting out regiment? You'd have to supply your own umbrella and thermos btw.
The financial Grans will be working on the economy and the diplomatic Grans on foreign policy.

Cherrytree59 Sun 22-May-16 21:10:42

Grans have the recipe to make the world a better place for our DGC
1 tbs of experience
1 dollop of common sense
1 tsp knowledge
A pinch of shrewdness
A cup of empathy
Sprinkling of humour
All stirred together with love and kindess to our fellow man

Jane I would love to join your Brigade!

Jane10 Sun 22-May-16 20:47:37

I think I'd pass a law against ill advised exposing of acres of flesh at the first sign of sun.
Maybe something about massive tattoos and also compulsory separation of bikes from cars on roads.
So many things I'd like to change.

GandTea Sun 22-May-16 20:22:26

Are you sure they don't go there for a quiet after lunch nap ?