Dreading Sundays and Bank Holidays

Only prayer meetings/bible studies with our Clergy (+ a bunfight of course)

Even (St) Paul said somewhere "....help thou my unbelief"

Some go to Church just for a walk
Some go to laugh,some to talk
Some go there for speculation
Some go there for observation
Some go there to meet a friend
Some the tedious hours to spend
Some to learn the Parson's name
Some go there to wound his fame
Some go there to meet a lover (!?)
Some go there new fashions to discover
Some go there to doze and nod
BUT FEW GO THERE TO WORSHIP GOD

An excellent idea.

All bank holidays are really drudgery periods-best avoided if possible. thesilverline a good port of call in bad weather.

I have just been to a meeting hosted by Contact The Elderly where a number of us have arranged to hold tea parties for elderly people who are isolated and lonely. Perhaps they are active in your area.

I moved from a rural location with no bus service into a small town . It has given me a new lease of life , I have joined groups which i can walk to and if i feel the need to see someone , i can just walk to the local shops or a cafe and usually see someone i know.
I know this is not possible for everyone but it does solve the infuriating 'lack of buses' problem.
However i still can't return here on public transport from the nearest city after about 9.30 pm!

Hi,

I am really sorry to hear that you feel like this. At Contact the Elderly we find lots of people find Sundays particularly difficult and that is why we organise free Sunday afternoon tea parties for people who are over 75, live alone and don’t have much family and friends nearby.

One Sunday afternoon a month, our volunteer drivers enjoy taking their older guests to a volunteer host’s home where they join a small group for tea, talk and companionship.

The group is warmly welcomed by a different host each month, but the drivers remain the same and the groups are kept small so that everyone can join in easily and get to know each other properly.

It’s a simple idea, but one that can make a big difference. Our friendship groups represent the perfect opportunity to get out of the house, make new friends within the local community, and generally brighten up a weekend.

If you are interested in volunteering or becoming a guest please give us a call on 0800 716 543.

Nottooold don't tell anyone - but I have a few vicar friends who quietly admit to not believing in God! I was shocked at first, but I count quite a few from various places we have lived in, as my friends, and DBH's parents are strongly involved in the church, as was DBH for many years. He and DS were both cathedral choristers.

I have asked many a clergyman over a glass of wine about their beliefs. It seems that when they were young, they did believe, but after a while they saw it as a way to bring comfort and peace and stability to those who need it, a chance to do good, provide a place of safety and welcome to those who felt fear and anxiety in a mad world, and to try to guide people's moral behaviour in some cases. My own vicar here is lovely, and holds discussions on philosophy once a week in her house! You would never know that any of our team here were vicars, they are all bonkers and all have other jobs as well. Anyone (new male curate) being too pious soon gets their pomposity pricked, but humourously. I don't go to church all that often, usually because I have been roped in to sing in the choir on special occasions and DBH plays the organ on occasion, but they are central to our village life, organising all sorts of lovely events.

janerowena - re your idea of going to church on a Sunday in order to see some friendly faces - I think I would do that if I was on my own. I know people here who go to our village church for that very reason, yet cheerfully say they are 'not believers'. The service lasts about an hour and after that they have coffee and biscuits at the back of the church. It all sounds quite sociable. Perhaps it is no longer thought necessary to be a true believer in order to take advantage of the Sunday goings-on?

I wish I lived closer so I could pick you ladies up and head for town! I wonder onlymee123 about starting a simple little gathering yourself? A coffee klatch for like-minded church and other friends (with better transport options) to come to you on so-called holidays.

Galen I always enjoy your enthusiasm for the holiday cruise. Don't forget your pearls .

That is something really nice to which you can look forard. The weather in the Canaries at that time of year is gorgeous- wall to wall sunshine.

Well I've solved Xmas by booking (surprise, surprise!) a cruise! I'll be on the Queen Victoria going to the Canaries. I'm back for New Year but that's not so bad I find.

I can see why people end up going to church, to see friendly faces on a Sunday.

An elderly friend who has been alone for 11 yrs says she no longer names her days... so Sunday is just another day and she treats it as such , she doesn't have much contact outside her home anyway so i guess its easier for her to just treat Sundays and Bank Holidays as 'another day'.

I feel just the same as you regarding Sundays and Bank Holidays, onlyme. I was widowed very suddenly in october 2008 and until then enjoyed a trip out somewhere most Sundays . I had to sell the car ,and house, after losing my DH and still feel isolated on Sundays and Bank Holidays . I have a DD, SIL,and 2 Grandchildren in the same city ,but they make it quite clear that Sunday is their 'Family Day, ' and that doesn't include me.
I keep as busy as possible during the week, with Volunteering. belonging to U3A and meeting friends ,but Sundays are just not the same. Occasionally some good friends
include me in a trip to a garden centre ,or similar, and I really appreciate that.
I know of several people who dread Sundays ,but through circumstances it isn't possible to meet up for company and conversation.
A married , very good friend, looked at me in a strange way when I remarked that I wish Sundays could be abolished! She has never lived alone and has a full life all the time.I dread to think how she would begin to cope on her own.

Yes Sundays and Bank Holidays can be difficult. Here is a link to a free phone call if it can help anyone. www.thesilverline.org.uk/

nottoo I hate them too, because DBH always has to work on bank holiday Mondays. He works in a big boarding school, and of course they have to just keep teaching. I met up with another wife yesterday who feels the same way, so in future we will do something together. I find it quite upsetting, especially for the first one in May, as there is usually something really nice going on everywhere you look, all sorts of activities but no-one to share it all with, as everyone I know always seems to have plans.

I expect, like me (I am often carless because DBH has car problems) you simply forget that taxis exist. If a taxi is all it takes to stave off feeling low, then it's worth paying the price.

Falconbird, I do so agree with you. I am already wondering about Christmas this year. It is the turn of my DD and family to be with the in-laws (fair enough, they live miles away and were on their own last year) and my DS and family, although nearby, prefer to spend the holiday on their own, so it looks like it will be just me and DH. I don't really mind, we are lucky to have each other I know, but I will feel sad nearer the time. Ridiculous, aren't I?

I wonder why there is the emphasis in the media on extended families nowadays (see Falconbird's post above) when the reality is that more and more people are living on their own and more and more families are more or less estranged from each other? And then, of course, there are the politicians banging on about 'hard working families'.

onlyme we do have a "widowhood" thread if that is of any help to you, (it's not all doom and gloom by the way, we like to have a smile]but do try and support each other at the same time., as with all the other threads on GN

I've never liked Bank Holidays. I think expectations are too high around them and people imagine that everyone else is having a wonderful time with family and friends. The same applies to Christmas as well.

When I was a young working women there were fewer Bank Holidays and Christmas was just Christmas Day and Boxing Day. Because of this we valued them much more.

There are too many adverts on TV about extended families getting together around tables groaning with food, or having a wonderful time at Bar-b-cues.

This may be a reality for some people but I don't think it is for the majority of us.

Yes, I know what you mean when my husband was alive we rarely did a Sunday/Bank Holiday trip, but we would mess in the garden together or do DIY, knowing we could just nip to Homebase or B and Q if we wanted anything, ah me things always look so rosy looking back. Anyway, enjoy it while you can, pottering about together may not be high living but its great, enjoy and thanks for reading my blog, had to get it off my chest.[Smile]

Same here asNotTooOld Mr Roses won't set off anywhere on a Bank Holiday further than our nearest town, though TBH our family all lives close anyway so we can see them if they are about.Mostly we are content to just potter about at home and do things during the week when it's quiet.
not having a Sunday bus service is poor though, we are lucky in that respect but I know friends who don't have a service either.

onlymee123, glad you have some good suggestions to work on. Just a thought that might cheer you up - it is easy to assume everybody is having a wonderful time on Sundays and Bank Holidays but in reality there are lots of us, even with families, who live too far away to meet up and so spend the time on our own. My DH and I rarely go anywhere on Bank Hols as he says the traffic is too bad and we are better off at home.

good !! you go girl .