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AIBU

Wedding presents

(28 Posts)
gracesmum Fri 07-Sep-12 15:25:00

Where I was brought up in Scotland (and I dare say we were far from unique) it was the norm to give a wedding present to the daughter or son of a good friend, whether or not one was invited to the wedding. Either something from the list if there was one, or perhaps a pair or set of towels, a salad bowl, servers etc
I have always done this as well as a card and it gives me pleasure to do so. When eldest DD was married 3 years ago, a few local friends gave her a present although they did not know her very well, but when littlest got married 2 weeks ago, I was slightly surprised that close friends and neighbours who have known her since childhood made no move that way!! Even our former next door neighbour whose youngest is the same age and wo used to mind DD after school when I went back to work did not acknowledge her wedding in any way. Maybe this is because it was in London and not locally but while DD and SIL are the least materialistic people in the world and would not have expected anything, AIBU to feel a bit miffed on their behalf?

maxgran Tue 11-Sep-12 16:17:48

I don't think anyone should expect a wedding gift from anyone, not even from relatives. Of course most people attending a wedding will buy a gift even if they cannot afford it.
It seems these days that people seem to expect expensive gifts. I have even heard couples moaning about gifts that were 'cheap'

When I got married many many years ago - I just wanted people I loved to share our day. I coudln't have cared less about getting gifts.

grandmac Fri 14-Sep-12 09:42:49

My son married just a year after my husband died so instead of having a gift list he made a 'Just Giving' page for people to donate to a charity in memory of his Father. People were most generous in their donations and also surprisingly most also insisted on giving a gift too. Personally I would always send a small gift to the children of old friends even if not invited to the wedding.