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My usless SiL !!!!!

(45 Posts)
ninathenana Tue 08-Oct-13 10:54:12

DGS had his procedure done in London on Saturday and was sent home that evening. Sunday afternoon he was in distress and was rushed to local A&E by ambulance. Despite being a cardiac baby and having arrived by ambulance DD waited in A&E for 2hrs ( but that's another story).
I have had older DGS over since Friday afternoon. SiL collected him last night and is day off today and tomorrow so was due to take him to school. He has rung the school and told them child is sick. To say I'm fuming at the waste of space that is SiL is an understatement.
I do more than my fair share of child care but now DD has asked if I will be responsible for getting DGS to school and collecting whilst she is staying at hospital. Aaaaahhhgggggg!!!!!!

kittylester Tue 08-Oct-13 11:07:38

Oh, nina that's the giddy limit and you really have no option but to step into the breach. How is your other grandson? flowers

ninathenana Tue 08-Oct-13 11:18:04

He's over the crisis but refusing all fluids and food. Consultant at local hospital has e-mailed the surgeon in London to try and move things along.
Thanks for asking.

thatbags Tue 08-Oct-13 11:29:14

How old is the older child, nina? Is a couple of days off school really going to matter in the long term?

I wouldn't step into the breach there. I'd leave Dad and son to it. If you keep taking on the dad's responsibilities, he'll keep loading them onto you.

I hope the child in hospital makes a good recovery and is being well looked after flowers

kittylester Tue 08-Oct-13 11:34:39

I think there is enough upheaval going on in the poor boy's life at the moment without him missing school which is presumably part of his normal routine. I get the feeling from nina's post that the time wouldn't be very productively used if he had the day off school. sad

thatbags Tue 08-Oct-13 11:40:43

You could be right, kitty, but perhaps the dad feels that spending time with his older son is what's needed right now and not the usual school routine. It isn't really our place to judge. We may not know all the reasons for the dad's decision.

Nelliemoser Tue 08-Oct-13 12:11:27

How bad an idea keeping the older child off school is depends on how often his Dad is doing this If it's because Dad can't be arsed to get him there then it is not acceptable. Given *Nina's" comments on her SIL I suspect this might be the case. I hope all goes OK Nina.

annodomini Tue 08-Oct-13 13:06:50

Nina, I'm sorry to hear that the little one has had a bad time again and hope that things will clear up once the doctors have the right information. If it will set your DD's mind at rest perhaps you should go along with her wishes and take the older boy to school. Does he have a good relationship with his father?

ninathenana Tue 08-Oct-13 13:52:15

Older child is 4 so only started school last month. SiL did this when youngest was last in hospital but it was only nursery then.
Yes he's a daddy's boy. Stupid thing is SiL told DD it "ties him down, having to get him there and pick him up". If that's the case then he should relish 6 hours alone !!

I would love to leave SiL to it but DD has enough on her plate at the moment without worrying about this and the prospect of fines.

j08 Tue 08-Oct-13 13:57:45

Is it very difficult to get your little four year old grandson to school and back for a few days? Do you have to walk miles or something? confused

maxgran Tue 08-Oct-13 14:22:59

Ties him down? Its his responsibility to get the child to school!
Taking children to school ties every parent down!

If he is off work then whats the problem?!
How would he cope if he was alone with the children every day?

I would certainly help, if I were you - if your SiL was having to get to work but certainly not if he is there and available!

ninathenana Tue 08-Oct-13 14:33:13

jO8 picking him up is fine but the mornings are complicated by the fact DH needs taking to work in the other direction (non driver) at the same sort of time.
If SiL was working I would do it but I don't see why I should when he's available.

maxgran couldn't agree more

maxgran Tue 08-Oct-13 14:36:36


I also have a useless SiL.
My daughter used to ask me to look after her children when her husband had nothing better to do than watch sport on the TV.
I had them over at mine when it was not really convenient several times - only to find out their Dad was at home and watching football!

ninathenana Tue 08-Oct-13 14:49:42

DD has just rung. He came to visit them at the hospital and she's come home for few hours respite and left him with both boys. grin Good for her !!

whenim64 Tue 08-Oct-13 14:56:34

Life is difficult enough without having to think about him and his games, nina. I hope all is soon well flowers

thatbags Tue 08-Oct-13 15:19:46

Beats me why women put up with such behaviour from their partners, or vice versa if that should ever be the case. That, to my mind, is the real problem.

Good on your DD, nina. Hope the wee one is improving.

thatbags Tue 08-Oct-13 15:20:40

They should do a jingle, and "bawl them out" grin

grannyactivist Tue 08-Oct-13 15:29:00

nina so sorry to read that the little one is back in hospital. Hoping for a speedy recovery and that family upsets are quickly resolved. flowers
I'm with Bags on the matter of children being their parent's responsibility.

Greatnan Tue 08-Oct-13 15:34:51

It is irrelevant how far Nina has to walk - the child is not her responsibility. Time for his father to step up to the plate.
Best wishes to all of you, Nina.

j08 Tue 08-Oct-13 16:22:56

Can't you ever resist commenting on my posts Greatnan? Are you getting a bit obssessed?

I love being able to meet mine from school. Not that it happens very often due to distance. sad

thatbags Tue 08-Oct-13 16:32:38

Er... whoops, jings. 'Twas I who commented on a comment of thine. #specialrelationship (you said that too) [tongue sticky out emoticon] smile

j08 Tue 08-Oct-13 16:41:10

No. I asked about walking. GN said "it is irrelevant etc"

Never mind

j08 Tue 08-Oct-13 16:42:20

Oh I Wasn't thinking about the bawling them out thing

Gagagran Tue 08-Oct-13 16:56:15

Nil desperandum jings. Some of us knew what you meant. wink

thatbags Tue 08-Oct-13 17:05:57

Oh. Whoops, thatbags!