Gransnet forums

AIBU

Cut out of their lives 3

(1001 Posts)
D0LLIE Wed 19-Feb-14 19:04:28

Seems that no more posts can be added to cut out of their lives 2 ...

Yogagirl Wed 30-Apr-14 17:45:07

What a caring soul you are Celebgran me thinks you deserve some of these flowers & maybe wine but most def a peg shock

I went to see a clairvoyant on Monday, she was absolutely amazing!
Turns out she had the same prob as me (& you), cut off from her D & GC for 5yrs! & the S joined in, so she also didn't see his child either! She said that she & her H felt so alone & this was jealousy, she was told she had an unhealthy relationship with her GD - too close! She said she was blamed for everything & when her father died, at the funeral, she tried to make up, but they just said ''you haven't learnt yet'', but two months ago they phoned her to patch things up!!
Anyway back to my reading; She said my cards were very dark & troubled, then asked what was wrong, I told her [briefly]. She said I must stop thinking & talking about them all the time as otherwise she could see I would be very ill. She told me to take a glass of water to bed & just before going to sleep & first thing in the morning, I was to sip the water & say "Please God, help me to stop thinking of D&GC all the time, as my brain needs a rest from all this sorrow" She said Jenni is not happy, the marriage is an unhappy one, she doesn't love him & misses her mother's love, he is pushing her to his mother, but that is not working for Jenni. She said in about 18months my D will be back. She said s.i.l will not live a long life & there is going to be another big court case, but nothing to do or involving me! It will be s.i.l, possibly drugs. She dose not see my D with any drugs, but he controlling her mind. The clairvoyant also said there is a baby & said it is def not Jenni's as she will have no more. Also my S will be back very soon, he will see the 'light' & from then on will be a strong influence over the situation. Oh yes & she said that the spirit world kept coming through & it was my Dad for sure, my dad was the one that could always get through to Jenni when needed! I've put it in a nutshell, loads more....flowers

Ashmore32 Wed 30-Apr-14 19:04:37

Moving day tomorrow, the last week has been a whirlwind of activity. The rubbish that we could have been given notice for being asked for at the very last minute.... Hey ho all done now.

As soon as we have settled in I am going to sort out my complaint in readiness. My counsellor has given me a lot to think about.

I am going to join the local leisure centre and try and get fit. The last 18 months have taken over my life. I need to find some me time.

Still waiting for the incompetents to let me know the next step. Waiting permission to get the information for her memory box added.
Piss up and brewery spring to mind.

Trying to decide what heart attack carry out to get as we have nothing to cook with....fried rat, fat Donald's, pizza ...Chinese or Indian.....if OH and daughter were not filled with lurgy we would go out....

New chapter, hope We can work towards a less traumatic ending.
It sounds as if Smileless has had a great time down under!

Looks like celeb gran needs to borrow my apron and cap. Good job you were there! As for Yoga girls clairvoyant, I am not a sceptical as I would have been after my mums friend, who 'dabbles' in such things and says she speaks with the dead.... She saw me in a navy blue uniform wearing a medal. At the time I only wore green at work as an enrolled nurse. It would be another 6 years before I wore blue with a medal earned at Charing Cross in Fulham. A further 8 before I got my navy blue.....
I have considered going to a hypnotherapist to help me sleep, something that is getting worse of late. I can't count tonight of course but 3 or 4 hours is becoming the norm....any tips?

I am hoping for a sunny weekend so I can sit on my new patio! Failing that in my conservatory.... I am so Excited!

Hope everyone is well and Smile (less) is not too jet lagged when arriving home...

Yogagirl Thu 01-May-14 10:34:09

GOOD LUCK ASHMORE with your move tomorrow flowers
Try 'Kalms night' it helps me sleep after 1year of no sleep! I'd like to think the clairyovant is correct, something to hold onto, especially as I must turn the page to May and see my beloveds B/day's up, Laila is four next Thursday. The last b/day we celebrated was her 2nd. When I went round with card & presents, there was no buntin up, no cake, I was told she'll celebrate on Sunday with her little brother, it was then Tuesday! I of course went out and got a B/day cake.........hope they have not continued with this!!
I went to a clairyovant when I was about 19yrs, a favourite with the stars, and 5yrs on it all came true, so who knows hmm

celebgran Thu 01-May-14 16:43:55

Good luck from me also ashmore!

Can imagine hard sleep with all that has happened, have you tried few drops Lavendar oil in warm bath. I also try quiet life tablets and glass milk.

Soothing relaxing music or tapes good idea but I am not great at taking time for that!

Yogagirl how are classes going?

Holiday coming up fast now only week time will be in sunny (I hope) crete!

Packing scheduled for Sunday!
Swam 14 lengths again after acquacise but oh dear feel tired thursday afternoons! Popping out for curry tonight so no cooking.

Knees more painful than ever elderly neibor recommended bee supplements health food thing so trying them!
Found out from uni friend of Tor that she has come off Facebook so no more photos !

celebgran Thu 01-May-14 16:44:42

Yogagirl forgot to say that clairvoyant sounds so good! I saw a spiritualist couple years ago wild like to do so again but is scarey!

Yogagirl Fri 02-May-14 08:21:52

Morning Girls
Hope your move went well Ashmore Goodluck in your new home, I hope you find some happiness there and get some good news about your GD. I must also say very well done on getting your medal flowers
Thanks for asking Celebgran yoga classes going well. Last Tuesday I did 5, I was driving from one to the other, I had a new 1-2-1 and then sods law a colleague of mine that I'd promised I'd be on stand by to cover her classes if her dog went into labour, called! Then Saturday I had 3 & then my Hafla in the evening where I did 6dances, it was a great night & my week was just so full, so really glad to have today off to get some much needed jobs done. I wouldn't do so many classes but need the income, lovely work but you need to do a hell of a lot of classes to earn enough to pay the bills shock
Hope your still having a good time in Oz Smileless
About the spiritualist Celebgran When the clairyovant said there was a spirit coming through, I asked if it was my dad's dad as he was a spiritualist, but I never meet him and I now feel so sad that I didn't, my dad & his brothers fell out with him before I was born & back then if you lost touch that was it. When growing up I thought you could only have one nannie & grandad, so when my friends would say about their other nannie & grandad, I would say "but you can only have one" I didn't understand it. He lived into his 80's so how very sad he never meet any of his GC, strangely just before he died my m&d bumped into him in Woolworth, but I was living in Africa then, so still didn't get to meet him. I think of him a lot now sad

Yogagirl Fri 02-May-14 17:22:59

Hello me again grin just listening to Corrine bailey Rae, lovely soft blues.
I've just been a naughty girl and put an advert in the paper for Laila & Jacks Birthdays next week, I thought 'why shouldn't I, I'm their Grandmother'
It has a lovely picture of them both with a red boarder & balloons.
It reads;
To: My Grandchildren LAILA & JACK
Happy 4th & 3rd Birthday My Beloveds
Your stepfamily cannot part us forever
Love with all my heart
Nannie D.....

So I think I'm about to die, as when my s.i.l sees this ad, which is going into the local paper, the evening paper & on line for a week, he will go ballistic shock

Just waiting for my ND to arrive for dinner, me thinks I may need a glass of wine & maybe one more glass of wine grin

celebgran Fri 02-May-14 19:33:51

Yogagirl my dear how brave! I would never ever have thought of that!

Do hope no unpleasant repercussions!

Is soooo cold here today !

Guess what when arrived at my friends her husband was there so they asked I'd Gra like joins us and Roy went back get him that was lovley.

Smileless2012 Sat 03-May-14 01:47:56

What a relief. I tried off an and on all day Tuesday to get on GN but to no avail, which was a real pain the bum as I was getting myself in to a real state preparing to say goodbye to DS and it would have been such a help to have been able to share it with you all.

Monday and Tuesday were difficult as DS and d.i.l. were back at work so we were left to our own devices and trying not to think about Tuesday evening and saying goodbye, which was of course more awful than words can say sad as it could be a year or more before we see them again.

Taxi was picking us up 3.30 am Wednesday morning for the airport and when we arrived to check in, horror of horrors, we'd got there on the wrong day, we weren't supposed to leave until Thursday blush. Couldn't believe we'd deprived ourselves of one more precious evening with DS angrysad. Taxi had of course left and lovely lady suggested we book on to that day's flight as there was room and no extra charge, so that's what we did. Couldn't face going back and going through all of those farewell's again. She suggested a Hotel for that one night which was amasing, as of course we couldn't check in here until Thursday, so at least we got an extra day in Singapore, which has to be seen to be believed.

Broke down completely when the plane took off and couldn't stop crying; quite literally cried my self to sleep. Felt as if my heart was breaking; that I was leaving my boy behind, as if I some how had a choice.

Enough of that, I'll tell you much more over the next few days when I'm back home, we fly tomorrow and land Monday at 7.00 am. Of course it's been wonderful, but there's also a lot of sadness which I should keep a lid on until we're home.

Good to here all of your news ladies. Wow Yogagirl you have been a busy little bee and rather a naughty one too grin. Good for you, why shouldn't you send bday wishes, and if they wont pass on cards and pressies a public announcement is the only way to go. flowers for your courage; I hope you don't get any nastiness. I'd thought, some time ago about having a lot of flyers printed with a pic of my gs, as a baby of course as they're the only ones we have, with the words 'Has any one seen my gs, because we haven't' and fastening them to all of the lamp posts in the village grin. Poor hubby nearly had a fit when I suggested it, still no harm in dreaming is there.

What a great post Celebgran, going to print that out, or rather get hubby to do it as I'm still a technophobe. When do you go on holiday? You must be really looking forward to it. Hope you have a wonderfully relaxing time.

Phew Ashmore I expect you're glad that's all over and can now enjoy your lovely new home and what I hope will be a new and happier chapter in your life. flowers as a small house warming pressie.

We're staying at the Marina Bay Sands Hotel (David Beckham was here last week). It has the highest infinity pool in the world, on the 57th floor and quite simply blows your mind; of course seeing David Beckham would have totally blown my mind; you'd think he'd have hung on for a few days wouldn't you.

So good to be able to get in touch with you all once again; makes the thought of going home a little easier. Best wishes to you all and have great week end.

celebgran Sat 03-May-14 09:03:43

Smileless wonderful to hear from you! Early welcome home tho realise you still In Transit.

You are not a technophobe! I will be off air for our holiday to give dear husband break! Thought taking iPad as free wi fi but I spend too long on it!

So sorry about flight.mix up but sound amazing overnight stay!

Yes looking forward to holiday and Danika party Monday tinged with sadness we never saw our little mollie on her first. Or indeed any birthday and she will be 6 on 8 June.

We don't got til wed so will be In touch !

Happy weekend to us all.
Ps I couldn't get on here tuesday for long while must been gransnet problem.

Yogagirl Sun 04-May-14 08:40:58

Happy Sunday Girls, bright & sunny smile
Thank you Celebgran, I must say I am getting a bit windy re reprecussions from adconfused, enjoy Danikas B/day & your uncoming hols.flowers
Well I believe you are in transet now Smileless, what a shame you got the day wrong for your return (my neighbour did the same & came home again) but sounds like you did well with your extra night in Singapore smile, Be brave, leaving your DS in Oz, maybe he will 'pop' home for a visit before then & then there is skype. Have a good flight back to ole` Blighty flowers

Smileless2012 Tue 06-May-14 21:57:18

Hi ladies, I'm home and it's good to be back grin. Yes I know, back to all the crap but when there's crap going on home is where I want to be.

Singapore was amasing, will certainly go back if we go back to Oz. So Yogagirl I'm assuming there haven't been any repercussions from your ad yet. Perhaps you've managed to stun them in to silence hmm. Thanks for the flowers, that was lovely to come home too. Good to know we're not the only ones getting our dates mixed up.

Hope you have a great holiday Celebgran. Enjoy your time together and RELAX, after all that's what holidays are for.

Hope you're settling in to your new home Ashmore.

It was my bday yesterday OMG 53, keep thinking I'm 54 confused. Lovely card and pressie from DS; nothing of course from the other one. Another opportunity missed, there's been so many I'm losing count, and as I seem to be having a problem remembering how old I am, may be I should stop trying to keep a track of all those missed opportunities.

Have a good night every one.

celebgran Tue 06-May-14 23:14:41

Oh smileless many happy returns belated! You are just a youngster!
So good have you back even if I am doing disappearing act now!

Take care all of you yogagirl, smileless, ashmore. Dollie and librachick wherever you are!

Tired now this packing lark has frazzled our nerves !

Off bed. God bless and speak in 10 days! Xx

Yogagirl Wed 07-May-14 07:52:25

Happy Birthday for Monday Smileless & welcome back.
My ad went on line yesterday and then in the Echo today & then the Standard for the week of the 9th. You can take a look on Echo news online (Southend-on-sea) announcements. I changed the wording & put 'miss you both so very much', as I was getting afraid of the repercussions! I started visualizing my house burning & my little dog dead when I returned home on Thursday shock, but they will still be annoyed when they see the ad. Going to write out my dear Laila's b/day card now (what to put confused, which will be ripped up as soon as it arrives, I have a replica to put in her gift bag though.
Hope your enjoying your hols Celebgran here's some wine for tonight smile

celebgran Wed 07-May-14 09:05:28

Oh yogagirl that's so hard Laila birthday will be me next month mollie, Gra and Lynn her godmother have date for rebook of visit that did not happen.

I am n building up any hopes. I try take photos of cards presents and put them on mollie blog also things like Easter eggs. Good idea to have box of duplicates I not done that.

Keep strong flowers yogagirl hope no repercussions to advert,

wine toast to smileless must get off her sad taking Rosie to kennels x
Done list t remind them what she likes !

Yogagirl Thu 08-May-14 08:09:18

Laila's Birthday today, thought I would be ok, but I'm really very sad, can't even phone to say happy b/day, how sad & cruel is that. Did think about phoning but... no! The ad in the papers is just v.plesant, so I shouldn't have repercussions, I'm going to put a 'happy birthday' message on FB with a pic, they wont like that either, but I'm going to anyway, and then put some money in her savings acc I opened for her, need to do all that on my PC.
When I put on FB last year about 'one year cut out......' there was a hell of a fuss made, thats when my S turned on me, I took it straight off again, but I hav'nt heard from my S this year, he even spent Xmas with them & didn't even pop in, just 5mins away, so sod them, I am going to put messages on every year for b/days & the ann of being 'cut out of their lives', it's the only thing I have! Wrote out little Laila's b/day card & sent it, just nice words, saying wish I could be with her...love hugs & kisses-wish they could be for real, and I put 'looking forward to telling you stories about your grtgrndma (my mum) & your grt,grt,grndma (my nannie) & even your grt,grt,grtgrndma who was still alive when I was a child! So just trying to hi-light the family generation thing, which can only come from me, her step-familys history is not Laila's, & my D wouldn't know that far back either.
I've made sure I'm extra busy today, to try & take my mind off things, having a coffee with a friend after my midday class as it's her b/day too today & then after my late class maybe having a quick drink with my friend who's husband left her after 24yrs.
Wish you all a good day.

Smileless2012 Thu 08-May-14 20:43:31

flowers for you dear Yogagirl. A difficult and heart breaking day sad. You have so much love and goodness to share with your dear grand children and please God, one day you'll have the opportunity to do so; one day we all will. Have a large wine from me. I'll have one too, to toast Laila's birthday. God bless.

Yogagirl Sat 10-May-14 10:16:49

Thank you Smileless & Celebgran, yes I did have a couple of glasses of wine when I got back at about 9.30 after a very busy day, & I normally never drink midweek. My friend came round last night instead of Thursday, so we had a nice meal & glass of wine together.
I was surprised when I got back Thursday evening to find no ripped up b/day card!! It's terrible to think I sent that lovely card to my dear GD but she wouldn't have even been shown the front of the card & it was her card afterall! I wrote her name in big letters on the front, so I wonder if she did actually pick it up and see it was for her, I'll never know sad
Hope your hubby is ok now Smileless & will be thinking of you Celebgran when it's your little Mollie's b/day next month, it's a hard day to get through sad flowers

Smileless2012 Mon 12-May-14 20:46:40

Well dear Yogagirl, there's one thing you do know, and that's the most important thing of all. You sent her a card. On her birthday a card arrived from her grand mother, she may be didn't receive it, but you sent it to her.

Hope you're feeling a bit better now. Hope all of you lovely ladies are doing OK and that Celebgran is enjoying her holiday.

celebgran Mon 19-May-14 08:32:13

Hi I am back! Can't wait go pick up Rosie. We had free wi fi. But I messed up! Got logged out Facebook could not remember any passwords!

Not before I saw picture of Rosie our kennels got son running it now and are on Facebook!

We had lovely lovely time maybe bit too much time discuss then sadness but it bought us closer. Hate package flights they get worse!

Hotel and staff were so lovely. We had gorgeous sea view sat on balcony to soothing sound waves!

Got my interview at school tomorrow trying fill Gra daughter shaped hole!

Smileless hope you ok now you back home.
flowers yogagirl so hard! I already bought card for mollie! going to Danika 1st birthday was lovley and helped heal us bit, just wish will all my heart could see my own.

Better get washing out first load! Foot hurting we needed up wrong terminal at Gatwick so much walking and our cases heavy and struggled pull them!

Love to you all xx

celebgran Mon 19-May-14 08:33:39

Sorry yogagirl meant to say well done for sending lovely card, glad no repercussions from advert, do hope it triggers something in your daughter to respond

Yogagirl Mon 19-May-14 10:22:55

Welcome back Celebgran glad you had a lovely time in the sun by the sea, you must have brought the sun back with you! lovely day again today. I went to Hadleigh Castle with my ND & her friend & baby Joshua yesterday, he is so cute & lifted my spirits, sitting on my lap. It's his 1st Birthday in a few weeks time, I'm going to his party, just a couple of hours before my Yoga class. Joshua dosen't have any GP in his life as Helen's mum died last year after years of suffering with Dementia & the other GP on his father's side don't want to know as they already have two!! so I'm like a surrogate nan! (a tiny bit) he loved sitting on my lap though & getting all of my attention smile
I've now got to write out my GS b/day card, it's his b/day tomorrow & he will be 3yrs, older now than when I last saw my Laila, terrible thought sad. I'm so sad as I just don't think I will every see any of them again sad

Smileless2012 Tue 20-May-14 15:19:00

Glad you're back Celebgransmile missed you and so pleased you enjoyed your holiday. It is 'good to talk' and it's great that your time away has bought you and your hubby closer together. In spite of all the heart ache and the many and long evenings we've spent going over and over it all, we too feel that we are closer now than we've ever been.

Hope your interview went well and that you've got your washing done. There's nothing like a several loads of dirty holiday clothes to be washed and ironed to leave you in no doubt that the holiday is over grin. Sounds like you had a lovely room; hope you had plenty of time to relax.

Well Yogagirl, little Joshua couldn't do any better than you for a surrogate nan. I hope you're OK, having to cope with the bday of another gc that you're not allowed to see or have any contact with, and so soon after Laila's and Jack's;flowers and hugs for you.

celebgran Tue 20-May-14 16:57:40

Oh thank s smileless lovely welcome from you and yogagirl! Wi fi was not good at hotel even if free!

Had client yesterday and today shattered still not finished unpacking but have done all washing and little ironing!

Yogagirl so sorry hard for you another birthday.

Agree with smileless that little Joshua's is lucky to have you as surrogate gran.

Quick rest now before picking husband up and doing dinner!

Yogagirl Wed 21-May-14 09:18:08

Morning Girls
It was Jack's B/day yesterday, only the two grandchildren, brother & Sister, only 12days between their B/days. I sent a lovely card & put a nice "Happy Birthday" message on FB with some nice pics. I put the ad in the paper for them both as their B/day's are so close & it cost me 50pounds for the ad!
Off to my ND's f.i.l funeral today sad. I locked myself out of the house yesterday from 8.30 till 11am, I had to cancel app.angry
Hope your interview went well Celebgran don't over do it now, stop for a brew.
Thanks Smileless hope alls well with you, for you too brew
Must dash....

This discussion thread has reached a 1000 message limit, and so cannot accept new messages.
Start a new discussion