Outrageous ageism at the toddler singalong!!

Answers to points raised:

There were no actions to this verse, absent

I don't feel hassled, Faye.

It is perfectly possible to laugh at something, without feeling personally offended, and yet be simulataneously taken aback and recognise tactlessness...can't see why that's contradictory, merlotgran.

I have no objection at all to hearing people's opinions about what I should have done, what I should do now, what other people would have done...

I know all about AIBU, so no need to sigh, GrannyTwice ....I am a Mumsnet veteran under a different username. I posted here to share this incident, knowing I was absolutely not being unreasonable in finding it unacceptable. Sometimes, AIBU is used in this way, to affirm one's reactions, and yes, I was interested to see if others would have reacted differently. Many of you, it seems, would have done something more interventionist, and that's fine. I jocularly invited those people to 'shoot me' for being passive and wimpy.

Hope that's all crystal clear now

It was slightly funny as a joke between adults, but not acceptable to put such an idea into the minds of children - they latch on to lavatorial humour very fast of their own accord, they don't need to have it suggested to them. The role of adults is to be mildly disapproving of such jokes so that children can revel in being daring.

This young man was being a child again to shock the adults - or he was being arch in appealing to the adults over the heads of the children, like the exchanges in pantomimes. Either way it wasn't on. I would like to think that I would have cornered him afterwards and pointed this out - not that i was incredibly shocked by it, but that it was immature of him, and he was teaching them to mock their grandparents, who would be mortified at smelling of wee - wouldn't he, if someone sang that while drunk he had peed down the front of his trousers? I am not sure whether I would have had the brass neck, though.

elena I thought it was quite funny. Maybe because my friends and I have various jokes amongst ourselves about "Tenaladies" and related problems. Of course he shouldn't have done it but he might just have been stuck without any ideas and have regretted it since. I wouldn't have said anything, takes me all my time to cope with a toddler without having to think about carefully worded complaints.

I was incredibly shocked by it Elegran. For obvious reasons.

Elegran, he was not a young man

He was late 40s, and old enough to know better. Yes, your pantomime comparison was about right, I think.

I do wonder if he has regretted it since, trisher....I think it's prob safe to say he is not a Gransnetter, but he might just have thought to himself 'blimey, I was lucky to get away with that!'

jingl Telling him that you were incredibly shocked might just have made his day - a result! Telling him that he was being irresponsible and unprofessional in his capacity as leader of that toddler sing-song could have had more effect.

Of course, he might have been unwillingly drafted in for one singsong, have no idea of how to lead toddlers and never ever do it again.

Late 40s? Singing a song like that with small children?

I think I'd be very worried about him.

#unsavoury

I didn't say I would have told him that Elegran. I have said I would have got up and walked out. Taking little'un with me of course.

I have to say I am appalled at this. If it was just grannies laughing together then that's one thing (on the basis that poking fun at yourself can be very different) but to be doing this in front of parents and especially young children is just not on.

Don't we older people face enough prejudice as it is without tiny children being given the idea that if you are a grannie you smell of wee? Because these things stick and children of that age are certainly not equipped to understand that this is a 'joke'.

Grey hair all too often seems to allow you to become the butt of other people's jokes and I for one am upset by this. I may be grey but I have my faculties. I volunteer. I look after my grandchildren. I have interests and a social life. I can use a computer and a smart phone and an ipad. And my personal hygiene is faultless. I'm just a normal person who happens to be a bit older. there is nothing funny about this whatsoever.

Very true.

Hear, hear

Dear Ladies
I am very shocked to hear this story. Funny! I don't think so and if we bystand are we not being the same as the person who is being ageist?
like any prejudice if we do nothing and say nothing then we are joining in and by smiling or laughing we are actually agreeing with the sentiment.
I would have been incensed and stood up there and then to object. Children would have seen you object and that would have been good modelling.
Who is this person and let me at em!
I used to sing this to my granddaughters and I do not know of any verse that includes 'grannies on the bus.
I always remember 'Little Britain' on the telly and they did an impression of a granny peeing her knickers in the supermarket. Up to that scene I loved it and then after I stopped watching.

laverne exactly right!