Hello everyone. I have been bottling my feelings up for a long time and don't know what to do.
Mine and DH's relationship with our only son has been strained for some time, he moved away from our rural hometown where most of the family live to a city two hours away, but refused to give us his address. He married in early 2014 and we were initially not invited, although eventually were after others in the family protested. However, we were sat far away from the couple and felt unwanted. We have not heard from them since and have no contact details for them, apart from an email address which is never answered.
In the summer, a friend of the family called and said she had spoken to him and met his new baby. A boy, around 12 weeks old. We had no idea DIL was pregnant and neither did anyone else in our family!
DH and I discussed this long into the night and the following day decided to visit DIL's parents house, where we assumed they would be staying. When we arrived there was a children's party in the garden and a strange man (seemed to be a server/staff) questioned why we were there. I said "I want to see my son, *****". He said "Mr [DIL's surname] is busy this afternoon, it's his daughter's birthday party". This man didn't believe that we were DS's parents and asked us to leave, it was very pompous for a child's party.
I am heartbroken that my only son would cut me out and pretend that I don't exist! He changed his surname to DIL's, like he is ashamed of us. He has TWO children (that we know about!!!) that he hasn't told the family about and we discovered the daughter is 4, so they kept her a secret from us at their wedding! How dare they keep our grandchildren from us. My father is ill and I think it is right for my son to know, but he obviously doesn't care. I don't understand what I have done to deserve this from my child.
What gives you a warm feeling? 🥰