On Christmas Day I will......

But I do go on holiday on my own, usually to brother or sister or just exploring English cities. It annoys me that some people just choose to be horrible instead of happy. I usually go on holiday in the Spring. I've gone off the threads subject now.....sorry.

I can't because he,s old and also I signed over 35 per cent of my house in an effort to cheer him up. I must not moan.

Kick him out. Just keep the dog.

Ill be sort of alone because my so_called long-time partner will be in his bed until one o clock, then all grumpy when he gets up. I've got no children and my siblings are miles away. I have got a lovely lurcher dog though . I'm always glad when it's all over.

I am not a fan of Christmas and always dread it. I have many years of memories of Mum and Dad arguing when I was a child. Mum became a Jehovah's Witness which made Christmas very difficult and eventually they parted when I was sixteen.
I will be fine this year as we are going away - we are taking my mother-in-law to Singapore as it's her 80th birthday in December and she lived there twice when her husband was in the army. She has been back several times since but now she is on her own she wants to go one more time and I am more than happy for an excuse to get away at Christmas.

I really feel for those of you who find Christmas difficult for whatever reason. I know circumstances can suddenly change and any of us could find ourselves in this position. I pray you'll find some comfort on the day.
This year we'll be 12 for dinner and probably a few more in the evening. The Sunday before we have our big family Christmas at our house, my sisters and I and all the children & grandchildren 36 of us this year, barely controlled chaos - but I love it.
As a Christian I do try to remember that it's not all about parties and presents but I love them too - and the face of the driver delivering all the wine!!

Good post Anneliz

Good post auntbett. I certainly remember some grim Christmases as a child, surrounded by family.

Anything that is different from those days is great. Every Christmas is different, depending on circumstances. If it's to be celebrated at all, then make it your own - not what advertising or tradition dictates. It's not always easy, surrounded by such brouhaha, but deciding how it will be and making the best of it eases the day.

Best wishes for all those who wil celebrate a virtual Christmas on GN. Make it a day.

I occasionally read in this thread DH is not very sociable and this being a contributing factor to why you are not visiting people at Christmas. Is this a time to be a little more firm about this situation, even saying, I would love to go so I will go on my own if you don't want to come, or similar.

It reminds me of a film Housewife 49 starring Victotis Wood and taken from the book Nella Last's war. Well worth watching.

Oh and Mollie you are rewarding bad behaviour. Book yourself into a hotel this Christmas paid with all the money you save from not entertaining these ungrateful people. Imagine all the pleasure they will have moaning about you and hopefully they will never speak to you again.

gillybob

You don't say why you are alone but my remedy is as follows:
Plan the whole day as if you are not going to be alone.
Go out now and buy yourself some gifts, wrap them and put them aside for Christmas Day. Decorate your house for Christmas as you would if visitors were coming.
Shop for some foodie treats, including something more interesting than toast for breakfast.
Cook yourself a Christmas dinner with all the trimmings even if it's a turkey breast rather than a full size turkey.
Watch all the rubbish on TV.
Have a drink and some chocolates and open your gifts.
Treat yourself as an important Christmas guest.
Remember it's just a day.

I have had some very unhappy times at Christmas and not always because I've been alone! Sometimes, it can be very lonely even if you have company if it doesn't feel right and communication is poor. The emotional charge of the Christmas period and the highlight on families being together and everyone being happy and getting on is just plain unrealistic. Don't take any notice of adverts such as John Lewis or the supermarket happy families - they are just trying to sell you something!
I have reinvented my Christmas but have been widowed for over 20 years now and it was hard to start with. Will meet up with others if appropriate and enjoyable, but otherwise chill out with really nice food and a lovely glass of wine or even a good cup of tea and cake in my own home. I usually go with a friend to Midnight mass on Christmas Eve and that makes it all seem quite special and makes up for feelings of sadness or desolation. I'm not saying that it would be great to have a loving family, but that's not going to happen. As time goes on, it is easier to adapt to life changes. My friend is not a churchgoer but is very happy to attend such an unlifting service, especially as the church looks so beautiful with lovely greenery etc. She then goes off to her family and quite often moans about it for the next few weeks!

Do you think "they" realise Luckygirl that one day "they" might be the person that no-one wants to spend time with at Christmas? or any other time for that matter

Scary isn't it Luckygirl...and they're all someone's Little Darling

I peeked at the "other side" and was amazed at the vituperation and foul language - they do not seem a happy lot.

Yes, and a lot of ( real) mince pies! Yum.

Blimey! My OP certainly has taken off in a direction I wasn't expecting . What a fascinating uplifting, sad, amusing, heartbreaking but mainly supportive hotchpotch of views there has been (including those from 'the Other Side'). So much support has been given for those of us that will be on their own, from those that will be surrounded by loved ones (but are not necessarily happier, and still possibly alone).

My emotion on writing the post was a positive one. No one needs to sit in the corner looking at the rain and feeling lonely, because there is escape offered in virally getting together - sharing our resources and having a bloody bloomin' good bellyaching Ho-Ho-Holiday!

For all those who can afford to go away on holiday at that time of year,obviously it makes life pleasanter and easier,but a lot of older people do not have enough savings to do that ,and where money is tight, life becomes restricting.

I'll be "all at sea""

I'll be getting up early to go to my church. The city have said in previous years that there will be no buses but drivers will still be fined for overstaying two hour parking. That's English Christmas Spirit!

Two years ago I went to the Salvation Army Christmas dinner. Last year to something similar at a community centre. I don't know what's available this year yet. After that I will go home and chat online to friends and contacts who are also alone.

I'm OK with this, but I do sometimes think of my children who are ignoring me.

It is going to be the first Christmas in 35 years without my beloved DH who died in May. I had planned to hide under the duvet all day until it passed, but as ex-son in law is coming over from the States to spend time with DGD, I shall have to make an effort for him.

I wish I could have all the lonely gransnetters join us - if anyone fancies a holiday in Malta, you would be more than welcome on Christmas Day

My mother couldn't bear a quiet Christmas and always invited in 'waifs and strays' to share the day with us. One Christmas Day, when I was a teenager, it was clear that there would just be three of us at the table so she contacted age concern and 'adopted' a couple for Christmas who's family lived abroad and felt alone in the festive season. We all had a great time and it was excellent role modelling for me. Now I'm a grandmother my family moan that im just the same.
I think that it does no harm to reach out.

Well after expecting the usual "non event" type of Christmas we've had in recent years, I've just heard that my eldest son is coming home for a visit from down under, and will be with us for Christmas. First time in 6 years, so I will really make the most of it. Not seen him for 4 years. Must find his stocking! Other son will come Boxing Day as works as paramedic on Christmas Day.

I truly do feel for all those alone, could be any of us at some point. Hope you all manage to work out a OK way to get through it. Too early for holly!

You don't have to stay with DC, a room in a hotel won't break the bank for one night surely.
I take my family out for Christmas lunch and then we go back to DS's house so that GC can play with their toys. I prepare and take a complete buffet meal with me, I even include paper plates and throw away platters. When DIL only has a couple of days off work I would not expect her to spend Christmas day in the kitchen.
If my family said they wanted to spend Christmas elsewhere that would be fine with me too, I don't need to live in their pockets.

For the past few years I've been on my own at Christmas. I didn't mind as I love my own company and I follow the same Christmas day pattern as I used to.

For several years one of my friends who was on her own and I "teamed up" and spent Christmas together but then her daughter moved in after her marriage broke up and that was that.

I didn't mind as, when I was on my own, I could do what I wanted, when I wanted and had no arguments about what to eat, what to watch on the tele.

This year I've got a house full - my daughter and her two daughters moved in with me in May when she left her husband. So I've got a busy Christmas day.

I love Christmas and the decorations go up around 12 December and don't come down until 5 January. There are all sorts of baking and making [I make my own sweets - the granddaughters love to help].

I've never felt alone when spending Christmas day on my own - maybe it's because I love Christmas and it doesn't matter if my family are here or not.

I'm sorry if people are on their own and not liking it - I hope they will find some way of having a good Christmas in their own way.

May I be the first to wish everyone a Merry Christmas!!