On Christmas Day I will......

I have looked at MN A I Being Unreasonable, there is a tongue in cheek posting about spending Christmas with friends not family. Very witty!

x

We always host Christmas Day, in fact we would like someone else in the family to host it for a change , and numbers vary from year to year, this year will be just us and DD2 , husband and DGS.However we will see the others either the day before or after,probably at their houses. I always find Christmas tiring to be honest, but have sympathy for those who would prefer it to be busy and tiring, especially if they are on their own.I think the whole holiday goes on for far too long.

I was looking forward to having Christmas dinner cooked for me when DD got married. It never happened they either had his parents over from Germany or they were there.
We had to make do with the Sunday before, at mine of course !

When I was getting divorced I faced the prospect of Christmas on my own but a very good friend insisted that I join in her family day and I have never forgotten her kindness. She now has Alzheimers and I am doing my best to be a good friend to her.
My youngest daughter reckons that Christmas Day is 'pay back' time for the help my second husband and I give during the year. We have a lovely dinner, play with the children and have a couple of glasses of wine in the evening then stay for the night.
We do not take this for granted but say to her that if she wants to do something different, just give us some notice and we will go abroad for Christmas.

Well I would tell 'em jings I'm not scared..... but I've never been a member. sound like a load of neurotic, know-it-all bullies anyway

That is exactly what I would tell them on Mumsnet gillybob. If I was still a member. And brave enough.

We are having our "family Christmas" on days other than Christmas Day this year. The Day itself will be much like a Sunday but with no buses or shops.
I firmly believe that we should only have Christmas every 4 years like the Olympics as it is too much for many of us as an annual event.

We have all of them or none of them as they like to get together (here!!) but have to do 'the other side' on alternate years. So this year it will be DH, DS1 and me! But they will all descend on 28th! Our girls (particularly) have a strong sense of family - they boys less so.

I'm not going to look at Mumsnet.

Perhaps we can nick borrow an off duty fairy godmother from the local panto and get said chickens turned into reindeer bohemian

I think what makes it hard for Grans who will be on their own is the fact that they were once the lynch pin of family Christmases and the contrast is hard to assimilate. I endorse jing's comment - how thoughtless some people can be.

ninathenana Reindeer and horses are in rather short supply in this house - (maybe someone else out there can oblige?). However, I have been eyeing up next doors chickens - they look as if they could do with a bit of exercise

Well I'm sorry but I can't imagine even trying to enjoy Christmas knowing my mum, dad, sister, whoever, were sitting alone. I know my view may not be popular but some families are just so bloody selfish . There I've said it .

And what's that 8Jingle*?

Thank you Charleygirl :-)

I feel like going over to Mumsnet and telling the lot of 'em what I think of them.

bohemian you have my sympathy. To know that family is close and your still alone must be awful. Will there be reindeer or horses for the sleigh ? I may well pop along
Mum always stayed with us from Christmas Eve until the 28th even though she was only a 10 min drive away.
This year we will miss the DGC as they are now with their father and DD is 500miles away. So it will be just us and resident DS we have no other family and as someone said it will be like a Sunday with different food

Mollie I think that I will stay as I am, on my own with my cat. I could not bear what you go put up with each year. Come here for a relaxing drink, put your feet up and I promise I will not mention ailments.

I can hardly bear to read this - I truly am so sorry for those of you for whom Christmas will be a lonely time. I know of no way that I can help or support in this situation, except to say that I will be on here on the day to wish you all well.

Life throws some tough stuff at us, and all we can do is stick together.

I do not know exactly what we will be doing at Christmas, but I do know that the girls will make sure we have company, see the GC and are part of the celebrations. We are fortunate that our DDs have a very strong sense of family - they keep us in the loop and share happy times as a "sisterhood." Reading this thread makes me realise how very fortunate we are to feel secure in that. We have done nothing to deserve it and realise that finding oneself alone in this way is just a throw of the dice. We have been lucky with the throw, but I will be thinking of those who are in a different boat. (Sorry about the mixed metaphors!)

I hate Christmas because it assumes that everyone loves a big family gathering and that's simply not the case. I know it is hard if you don't have family or are excluded from family gatherings - how can you not imagine the rest of the world is having a wonderful time without you? - but it's just as hard on those of us who would really like to spend a very quiet Christmas but feel obliged/obligated to cater for, or visit, family that they'd much rather avoid? I have family members who expect to be picked up, entertained, treated like royalty without making any effort to help, and spend all the blasted time complaining about their life and pushing food around the plate and making comments about not being able to eat or drink this or that because of whichever ailment/medication is the current focus of attention. They complain about the heat, or lack of, about the noise or the overly bright lights or the TV programme that's on... I hate Christmas because it's not happy and cheerful but torture and how I'd love to say 'no' but then that will give certain family members more to complain about to anyone who stands still long enough to listen! Sorry if this sounds a bit bitter and twisted but those of you on your own you can at least do something to make your day better. Short of leaving the country or mass family murder I'm stuck with my lot!

My Christmas has diminished with the passing of the older generation. My mother used to host the family boxing day party, where relatives from all over the country would arrive at our house. We could have 20 people of assorted ages for tea. It was wonderful. When my sisters and I married and had our families we took over, taking it in turns to host the party. Sadly this no longer happens. This year it will be DH, DS and me. I will still make the goose etc., but it isn't the same.

Tegan That's the hardest bit for me too - knowing that my family are all close by but somehow can't find the time to pop in and see me..

Someone that I worked with once said, at a works Christmas meal [something else I miss now] that Christmas is the one day in the year when you make an effort to spend it with family; a comment that haunts me at this time of year.

aggie Join us GN'rs in a wonderful, hilarious (judging by previous GN viral get-togethers) sleigh ride - it'll be fun!

I think I could cope more with Christmas if my family were a long way away but they're not; they just choose to spend Christmas with DS's family or, in the case of DD they have a simple Christmas but then go to their fathers family on Boxing Day. As the in laws were, for many years my only family, it hurts terribly that I'm not with them. They used to make up for it at New Year [which is my birthday] and we used to have a meal then but their village throws a huge party and they go to that now. I guess the problem is that I put on a brave face and don't let on how hurt I feel sometimes. We even seem to be excluded from pre Christmas family trips to various events. I did actually cancel Christmas last year, but will make an effort this time.

I love company and usually have all 6 children with their OH s and children , but OH isn't fit this year and 5 mins of a boisterous GC leads to a fraught afternoon , so all been talking and decided to avoid us , had offers of a sitter for lunch , but that would mean them missing out so opted for staying put and a doggie bag . I have bribed them , bought them off with promise of doing my Christmas pud and sharing it out I am ok with it all , not bothered at all . OH was never the sociable type

annodomini No, I don't think you're being smug. After such a traumatic childhood experience, you certainly deserve to have the most wonderful family Christmas