Table manners

My DH complains that Im on my smartphone too often- and I have to say gransnet is one of the culprits! Also whatstapping with the family. But i do draw the line at the meal table or if we are out with friends (apart from sharing photos usually of grandchildren as someone else has said.) If the phone is with me i turn it to silent so Im not tempted. My DH hardly ever turns his on and tells me its for phoning full stop. He does emails etc on the pc at home. We still use a landline phone as there is no mobile signal here.

Even the family over christmas did not use phones at the table though there were occasions once irctwice when we were all in the same room doing what DH calls 'prodding at those damn machines'!

I was guilty of this until someone asked:

"Are your remote contacts more interesting or more important than the real people that you are with now ?"

Now I consciously keep my phone in my pocket when I am with friends
.

Couldn't agree with you more. On a recent holiday I spent every mealtime "alone" while my cousin, nephew and GF spent every minute on their phones. So very rude.

Banned from the table in our house .
I take mine when I go out and would answer a call as only my DDs tend to call me on it and that's rare so it would likely be important/urgent (but would ignore if anyone else As I do at home ....)
Texts etc I might pick up if I go to the loo....or my companion does .!Think it's extremely rude to ignore your real life company for them and I would have said so to your friends I'm afraid .I do have one friend who used to do it but she's got the message now.I and two other friends just teased her unmercifully and it worked

I was at our Manse for Christmas dinner a couple of years ago and a young man brought a girl with him. Not sure if she really wanted to be there.
We were all sitting chatting before the meal and she was just looking at her phone, I had had a glass of bubbly and asked her if she was waiting for a very important call.
She said no and I asked her to put the phone away. She did,not with good grace and was really surprised that we did not all have phones out including teenagers.
She is a very nice girl and it was nice to get to know her not just the top of her head.

Rude and f****ng ignorant. I would have spoken in a very loud and assertive manner letting them know what I felt about their behavior. And then got up and left.

Mobile phones have become like dummies - people can't go anywhere without them clamped to their ear, or held tightly in their hands - and they are STILL being used by drivers. When will the message get through that they are an 'added extra' not an essential? Why don't restaurants request that they are not used at the table (however, that would mean that some leave the table every few minutes 'just to check'!)

Also totally agree - I saw a joke somewhere recently, a chap sent out an invite asking people to come round for a drinks evening and stare at their phones.

We keep a phone and charger in the car in case of a breakdown, otherwise neither of us carries one. We tell each other where we are going and roughly when we are back. Everyone else can reach us on the house phone and I would and have commented when visitors come to visit and then keep looking at their phone. By not having phones we both have a lot to chat about when we come home.

I think it's disgustingly bad manners. If I go out for a meal with others, then I want to talk to them, not the heads bent down looking at their mobiles.

It's rudeness beyond belief. Are they also the sort of friends who are more interested in taking photos of each stage of their meal and posting it on Facebook to bore us all still further?

It is very rude. My DD is attached to hers. Although 47 now, she is not exempt from mother suggesting she puts it away!

To those who ask what we did without them...if ever the car was playing up on the M'way we trudged along the hardshoulder, in any kind of weather to one of the phones and then all the way back to the car to await recovery. Remember? Those days are gone fortunately, thanks to mobile phones.

It's a bad habit / addiction. I like the idea of saying that all phones should be banned from a restaurant table and if anyone picks one up then they pay the bill. I won't have phones at the table at our house. Only Trouble with people who are in business is that it might be a customer or business related call, as in my husbands case, but I make him get up and go outside, if it Vibrates in his pocket. He can excuse himself from the table, look to see who it is and then ring them back if necessary . OR NOT !! You don't need to answer a call then and there and The Ring tone can be turned off!! As to scrolling through your messages in company, that is downright rude and I would have to say something. Just say - " can we all turn our ring tones off and put our phones away before we sit down" next time- if there is a next time!! It used to be the same with the tv - trying to talk to people with their tv on . I always turn ours off if someone comes but other people don't and it's very distracting. The kids today have it on all day!! I fear for their social skills in the future.

It's very rude I have posted about this before I hate to see little ones being ignored while parents are on phone ,we went out in car yesterday for a short journey saw 4 people driving while on mobiles will they never learn !

Next time you are invited, I would say that I only accept invitation to share meals with people who ban mobile phones from the table.

I totally agree with you. There were 10 of us at our work Christmas dinner in a very nice restaurant. My OH and I were the only ones without our phones on the table throughout the whole meal. We should have just gone out together as our conversation would have been no different!!

It's poor manners, no question about it. The only exception to answering the phone during dinner would be if one is on-call for work, or to be in touch for a serious, life and death matter. Snapping photos of your food isn't life and death... and if it is, you shouldn't be eating at that particular restaurant! ;) Growing up, we were told it was poor manners to read at the table. All of us were bookworms, but books were forbidden. Same thing, really. Did anyone else have that childhood rule?

Wholeheartedly agree - unbelievable rudeness

Yes I think the majority of us find it rude and extremely irritating. Smartphones seem to have hypnotic powers over almost everyone I know, compounded by Facebook!

I tend to have my ringer 'off' and rely on vibrate/silent mode. I can't imagine having a conversation with someone else whilst out for lunch with a friend. And if going to friends for dinner, it's left at home.

I wouldn't give it up as somehow it's comforting to know I've got an easy method of communication in the event of a car breakdown etc.

Do public telephone boxes still exist?

My 25 year old son has often come home early from a night out because of this. He is as attached to his phone as the next person, but as he says, there is no point sitting with a group of friends and not interacting with them. He can stay at home and communicate with them via phone!

I am in agreement with paddyann. All phones placed face down in the centre of the table (or preferably out of sight) and the first person to check theirs picks up the bill.

I won't allow phones anywhere near the dinner table at home, either.

We brung him up good :D

I like the mobile phone being compared to a dummy Aepgirl. There's an article there somewhere

I refuse to have a smart phone; I do have a simple mobile phone for emergencies, normally kept in the car but then I forget about it and the battery runs out. My landline is still sufficient for all my phone needs.

People are amazed when I tell them I do not have a number to give them. I tell them I am amazed they expect me to do as they wish. Filling in forms can be funny especially when the box for mobile number is a 'mandatory'.

So in the circumstances of this OP my approach would be very clear. Please come to this lunch/dinner WITHOUT any mobile phone. If you are so attached to your phone that you cannot leave it alone for a couple of hours while we enjoy a meal together then do not come.

If you think that is rude then consider why you even want to have any meal where you end up feeling so annoyed about it. At least you get your message across beforehand so they cannot fail to understand your feelings.

I'm convinced that prioritising a phone over a human is a way some people who perceive themselves as insignificant ( even if subliminally) seek to make themselves feel important.

It's so sad many adults aren't prepared to lay down boundaries any more, where phones and devices are concerned. Schools have to answer for a lot too: most don't ban phones, even from the classroom (as long as they are not used in the class). The pier pressure to have a good phone is horrible for less well off families. Mobile phones are, it seems to me, spoiling childhood!
I wish the government and schools would intervene once and for all, for the sake of family life and the children's mental health.
Phones and childhood don't go together! And when adults get addicted to the point of ignoring their immediate environment, don't they really need to seek help. Parents in the park on their phones: you're missing out on your child, and they are your number on, never to come again, fans!