Warts and all

It's almost like post code snobbery, isn't it? I sometimes think people make such remarks to make themselves feel better about the choices they've made for themselves. Maybe your son isn't as happy as he claims to be about where he lives.

My brother used to live in a high rise flat in a not very nice area. We have a small semi in an ordinary area. He used to constantly criticise our area, house, garden etc. Now he lives in a house in a nicer area, he is much more complimentary about where we live. I think the green eyed monster was at work before.

DS was bullied at school and was glad to get away from the village/town we lived in. He settled in the city, and then a nearby village because he wanted his son to grow up in a village (!), he went to university in. He sometimes made derogatory comments about his "hometown" which upset me because I felt he was criticising US, his parents, rather than the place. I told him this and he was horrified and the comments stopped. I know he wouldn't want to come back here to live but he comes to see, and support, his parents as often as he can. I know your son didn't grow up where you now live but maybe a little word to your DS would have the same result - I really hope so.

I think the next time he makes a comment of that nature say how happy for him you are that his place is "so much nicer". Do not continue accepting the criticism - walk away.

It's strange isn't it.. we moved to a beautiful small town/village so the children could live in the countryside.. when they grew up They moved into a City saying they preferred all the hustle/bustle and to be near shops/museums/theatres...you thought you are doing your best... mind they were never rude.. now I live miles away.
Each to their own... but wouldn't like them to "diss" where I live..I would never do that to them (even though secretly I would hate to live in a big town). Perhaps he doesn't realise how upset you are - try telling him I bet he doesn't realise.

My brother in law was always derogatory about the North London suburb which is our home. He died 8 years ago and my sister moved to be near us. She has built a new life for herself and loves it here. It always makes me smile when I think of the things he said.
It's nobody's business but your's where you live

Thank you all. I think a serious dose of GNs' opinions on the matter would do him good! I'm sure the hour and a half he battled on a stuffy tube put him in a diabolical mood, but I was upset he turned it round on us who are happy to accept the busy location we chose as a part of our lives.
As suggested, think it's a maturity thing, but because it was rude and upsetting, I shall be better prepared with some of your comments another time. Otherwise it will become like a dripping tap, mainly because he knows he can score points on this issue.
Oh well, off to enjoy catching the sardine express!

I agree with radical nan good post. It doesn't matter one bit what he likes its your life and choice. Tell him to butt out and show you some respect.

SOS
I can't get on to GN via pad or phone
I have accessed this thread via GN Facebook
But when click active it goes on to tom cat and pages of numbers
Is it just me??
I note that this post states today 20.39.
Will stay on this thread in hope of some info

Apologies for interrupting thread OP

Not just you Cherry tree I have had the same problem on and off since this afternoon.
Sorry everyone.

Children (of whatever age) can be very conservative creatures and I suspect that your son simply doesn't like the idea of your upping sticks and moving away from a place which represents security for him. One of my children still hankers after the house she was brought up in, despite having moved away 30 years ago.

As for your son's continual derogatory remarks, simply say (with a smile if possible) "Look, I know you don't approve of our moving, but we like it here - it's our choice so there's no point in continually moaning. End of." He just might get the message.

None of his business. Even if he doesn't like the place you choose to live he has no right to disrespect your choice. Is he a snob? I just ask because I have a cousin who refuses to visit her mother. Her mother has to take a coach to where she lives and stay with her. She was born and raised on a council estate in the house where her mother still lives. When she went to uni she seemed to become ashamed of where she was brought up. Now she doesn't want anyone to know she's off an estate.

Lillie, Just show him the attached.

When our house was repossessed and DH and I moved into a council house my mother went to great lengths to hide the "shame" from her neighbours. Unfortunately it turned out that her newsagent's son was now living a few doors away from us so it didn't stay secret for long. The fact that we didn't care who knew didn't help her either