Thank you ladies, I now see that it isn't me , it's her. I did mention, that I wouldn't be going on the Thursday, and her reply was, that another friend older than us, (she has children our age, we are in our early 50s) was poorly she still went to see her, so she could nip out ( she was a carer for her mum, for seven years, ) and I felt that it was a slight dig, at "well she did it, so why can't you?" So I have decided I need to rest, I need me time, she never texts or rings, to see how I am , apart from to check if I am going round, the day before, One sided is right, so "Me time" here I come, Once again thank you, will let you know how I get on, xx