Pride and Fury

Alina, and Greyduster - what you say makes sense.
Someone came on supply to a school I worked at. A colleague who already knew her said that her son was the soldier had recently been in the media for a courageous act while serving in Afghanistan. He'd put his life at risk and saved several fellow soldiers.
His mother is a very down to earth person, I think her son would be the same. She said her son had just acted automatically in the situation.

Wing Commander is a rank, Tweedle

elenkalubletan, caterers are in the front line feeding the fighting troops. Wing Commander is a sort of management title.
All disciplines and trades have their part to play in conflict.

I understand your point, granny. But isn't this the reality of being in the military or being the spouse or child of someone who is? The risk is always there if they're in a war, even if they've "played safe."

You can't help how you feel, but please don't show the negative part to him. If his dw has an issue with it, she'll let him know. If she has accepted it, then no point in your expressing your "fury."

Congratulations to your very brave relative!

Elenkalubelton, Ranks in the armed forces apply to all personnel regardless of their role.

You don't have to fly a plane to be a wing commander. The catering corps is a separate branch as it would be in the Royal Navy and the Army.

Congratulations to your relative ga. The world would be a poorer place without those who put the needs of others before themselves. The obvious and recent examples that we are all aware of are the fire, police, paramedic and health workers who ran to help when most ordinary people were running for their lives.

I do understand your feelings ga - a sort of paradox.

This is the whole dilemma about military service isn't it. It's wonderful that these heroic people exist but at the same time you would dearly want your own relatives to be safely at home.

Reading the posts made me think of an elderly neighbour who used to visit me years ago,his title in the Royal Air Force was wing commander.So interested in his past career I asked him what action he'd seen flying etc.He told me he was in charge of the catering in the canteen.Being only 25 at the time I scoffed at this and could not and still can't understand why such a title was bestowed upon someone who had never flown a plane.He was quite upset about this and brought to show me a plan of his responsibilities when he was in service.I apologise beforehand, can someone explain?

I agree Kim thank God for all the services who help and protect us. I can understand the mixed emotions but pride and love must be paramount with their families

Interesting topic this. I recently had a conversation with a young lady who hoped a fireman was thinking of his family as he ventured into the unknown but undoubtedly hazardous and scary. I said quite the reverse in that I hoped his mind was totally on his job and training. If we all put family first at all times I rather suspect no heroic events would ever take place. I often think circumstances dictate involuntary action rather than thought and I sometimes wonder if awards are ever relevant. I am nonetheless I'm impressed and moved by some apparently heroic action that has been reported in detail from time to time and usually find the 'hero' to be some gentle, quiet and unassuming person. Thank God for them.

Our forces personnel have a " calling" to do what they do, the same as Dr's, nurses etc It does evoke many mixed feelings tho. I have cried with heartfelt pride seeing our forces return from war torn lands, then cried tears of distress when some are so severely disabled etc But as a mother, I cannot help but feel relief that it's not a career that any of my children chose. We are all human and at times all are various emotions are naturally at odds with each other.

I really can't see why you should be feeling 'fury' in this situation. Rejoice in his courage - what a fine fellow he must be. No doubt his wife has come to terms with the fact that his is a dangerous occupation and with great risks. The world would be in a sorry state if our heroes stopped to think of the consequences of their actions, in fact there would be no heroes. Save your fury for evil, cowardly people.

I come from a service family -father, grandfathers and uncles. I did 5 years in the RAF myself.
I do understand the conflicted feelings but, I am afraid that comes with Service life.
He did something outstanding to get the MC. Be proud of him and grateful that he survived to get back to his family.

People going to fight the enemy have one thing in mind to protect their family and others against the aggressors Foremost in their minds is their family Are they not protecting them by their brave actions.
So should they too play safe sit back and let others make sacrifices for them.You and I and thousands of others are alive today because of these brave persons.
I was never to know my grandfather as he went to fight the enemy leaving behind my future grandmother with her six year and four year old children.

I have to disagree. The awarding of military honours at this level is anything but arbitrary.

My gut feeling is that heroism is within all of us when called for but, fortunately, for most of us the occasion doesn't arise. Also, without denigrating whatever this soldier did, the award of military honours can be quite arbritary.

Maybe a family man shouldn't choose a career in soldiering. That's the real issue.

My father was given the Military Cross during the war. Family history says it was just after his first wife had died unexpectedly leaving a three month old. He apparently went on an RAF mission with no care as to what could happen to him. He is no longer with us, but I have his medal and the letter from his commanding officer about it

As has already been said, you must feel very proud of what he did and very grateful that it ended well. Many congratulations to your family member

GA Such mixed emotions I'm sure but obviously so well deserved and you must be so proud.
for you hoping they find you and your family well.

I can only underline what has already been said.
In the overall picture it is the greater good.
Hard when it is so close to home.
But if it had been your family member that had required such a courageous act you would be for ever grateful.

So *grannyactivist" maybe a big hug and a wee punch .

And a big from me!

Treasure him and treasure the medal too. It breaks my heart when I see medals up for sale on Flog It - someone's incredible courage reduced to an auction. I still have my great Grandad's medals rom the Boer War - my son isn't terribly interested so I will give them to a military museum rather than let them just rot.

ga it is understandable that you should feel conflicted by this. At the end of the day, soldiers will do what they are trained to do without a thought for themselves and, yes, for their families, when the chips are down. I'm sure you are rightly proud of your relative - it is a definitive honour to receive. Congratulations to him.

An understandable reaction, ga, he's safe though so let your pride in him shine through, He wouldn't be the person he is if his actions had been different. My congratulations to him.

Congratulations to your relative ga, very brave.