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AIBU

Feeling a little uncomfortable about all this virtue signalling

(90 Posts)
grannyactivist Thu 28-Dec-17 14:45:56

Just to put another point of view across; I have two friends whose lives are reflected by their FB posts. If they go for a walk they post the photographs, if family visit I see the photo's, if they're eating in or eating out - up go the photo's. Their lives are like an ongoing documentary and they both have huge followings so each post generates a lot of traffic - and if they were doing something for others it would be up there for all to see - and yes, would generate lots of 'well done hun' type responses. Maybe the people mentioned here are similar.

merlotgran Thu 28-Dec-17 14:33:58

This year I've seen quite a few people announcing on fb that as of next year they will no longer be sending cards but will make a donation to charity instead.

If it's 'like for like,' unless they have a very long Christmas card list I doubt it will be a very generous donation and is more likely an excuse for CBA.

Chewbacca Thu 28-Dec-17 14:30:52

Completely agree with you OP. Our village has its own Facebook page and on Christmas Day there were 2 posts of similar ilk. One actually posted a photograph of the joint of ham "marinated in cider and honey and slow roasted", and asked for details of "where the homeless people are so I can take it to them". They could have taken it straight to the food bank and said nothing but then no one would have known about their good deed, would they?

Iam64 Thu 28-Dec-17 14:24:34

Thanks BlueBelle. I joined facebook after I retired and found it's been great for keeping up with relatives who live out of the Uk. I've discovered some cousins and their adult children and been surprised and pleased to find we have interests in common. I've picked up various buggies and toys for our grandchildren free or cheap, donated all kinds of things which local folks have been pleased to collect. I don't have friends who say 'well done hun' though I do have friends who take part in various fund raising runs/walks which I may or may not donate to.

BlueBelle Thu 28-Dec-17 14:21:08

Fb has been good for me I have organised a reunion and met many many school friends through it I would have had no chance of ever finding them without FB ....I buy and sell the grandkids surplus toys books etc without fees and I ring my son and family in NZ every weekend totally free thanks to fb Of course it depends what friends you have on your account and what pages or groups you belong to
I certainly agree with the original post but I don’t think’ that just happens on fb and I have seen all the sycophantic ‘well done hun’ posts and I m not comfortable with them either but they are only a small part unless you visit lots of loc al groups away from your friends and relatives

MawBroon Thu 28-Dec-17 14:05:52

confused?

westendgirl Thu 28-Dec-17 13:36:44

My travel insurance expired after a birthday and now I am looking for a new one which will not charge an arm or a leg and will not expect me to jump through their hoops just because I am getting older. I am not likely to dive from balconies, nor need hospital treatment because I swam after drinking too much.

Nannylovesshopping Thu 28-Dec-17 13:35:17

I think Facebook is only about bloody showing off all the time!!

janeainsworth Thu 28-Dec-17 13:19:23

Totally agree gill re taking cooked food directly to the homeless & the inappropriateness of the 8 year old mother’s behaviour.

But.... there is an argument for raising awareness via social media.
If you donate to a charity via Justgiving, eg someone you know is running a marathon in aid of something, at the end of the process you’ll be asked to share it on FB and/or Twitter, on the grounds that statistically, every shared story results in a 50% increase in donations, or something like that.
Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. If I do, I tend to get told off by MrA for ‘virtue signalling’ confused

NannyTee Thu 28-Dec-17 13:07:28

Yes. To put it on fb is glory hunting.

Grandma70s Thu 28-Dec-17 13:03:32

I know at least two people who make sure I know what they give to or do for charity. I always wonder why they don’t just do it and keep quiet.

MissAdventure Thu 28-Dec-17 12:56:13

I can't stand that sort of thing..

grumppa Thu 28-Dec-17 12:55:46

Well said.

OldMeg Thu 28-Dec-17 12:51:04

I totally agree Gill and it’s not just on FB either.

GillT57 Thu 28-Dec-17 12:47:46

It could be me, being a bit pah humbug, but......on our local Facebook page, just before Christmas, there were many posts from people announcing that they had just cooked a big roast dinner which they were going take out and give to the homeless people living in our town. One woman was saying that she felt her daughter (8) was acting in a selfish manner and so she planned on taking her out to see all these poor people living in shop doorways to illustrate how lucky her daughter is, and they were going to be taking food and drink with them. These announcements were followed by the usual 'well done, hun' and 'oh, how kind' etc, etc. My thoughts are that the woman with the daughter was totally out of order; the people living on the streets are not characters in some Victorian morality play to be used to illustrate how fortunate some are. Also, why announce to the FB world that you are going to cook an enormous Xmas dinner and take it out on the streets? There are charities working away, quietly, and efficiently, every night of the week,every week of the year, not just at Christmas helping those who need it, and surely that last thing they need is people turning up with tons of ready cooked food which will likely end up being binned? Surely it is better to quietly donate to those charities who know who needs what and when, charities who don't want a lot of people taking photos of themselves being lady bountiful? I don't know if this makes me a grumpy old woman, but it really annoyed me.