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AIBU

Noise

(55 Posts)
Oldwoman70 Thu 19-Apr-18 07:48:17

I am fairly easy going and get on well with my neighbours. However, I am a light sleeper and I am getting more and more annoyed by one family. The son, in his 20s, has recently bought a very noisy sports car. When he comes home after a night out he roars up the road, revs the engine and then slams the car doors, it seems several times. During the week it is usually around midnight but at weekends it can be anywhere between 1.00 and 3.00 a.m. His parents both work and leave home around 7.30 a.m. and are also door slammers - first the garage door and then the doors of both cars. I know this sounds petty but between the son being noisy when he comes home and the parents being noisy when they leave I am getting very little sleep.

absent Thu 19-Apr-18 07:54:25

Have you thought about mentioning this to them without being aggressive? Perhaps they simply haven't realised.

Situpstraight Thu 19-Apr-18 07:56:19

Oldwoman it isn’t petty it’s annoying, but I guess when we are retired we stop being the annoying people who leave home early and slam car doors!
My friend has the same problem and she wears ear plugs, small squishy things, it took her a while to get used to them, but it saved her from falling out with her neighbours.
To be honest there is no way that the whole family can prevent you from hearing them leave home for work, but a friendly word about the sons car might be useful.

Oldwoman70 Thu 19-Apr-18 08:06:47

I have mentioned it to them - made a joke about having to replace their doors at some point! They are good neighbours in every other sense and I certainly wouldn't want to fall out with them. Their son is also an otherwise pleasant young man so I will try to have a friendly word with him. I was disturbed last night and again this morning so I think I just wanted to vent!!

Panache Thu 19-Apr-18 09:16:28

It is sadly almost a universal problem and when interrupting your sleep it really is too much.However rather than fall foul of this family which in other respects do not seem troublesome I think ear plugs are the route to follow.

We lived in a lane leading to both the coastal footpath and beach so were subjected to random parking and families both off loading for their day out,and then returning to reload their vehicle ............and we swore every car had a dozen doors and these people carried all but the kitchen sink on their days out at the sea side!!
Very frustrating.
However they being strangers one could never really approach them because it changed daily.So at least I fully understand and I sympathise.

rentawitch Thu 19-Apr-18 09:34:20

Earplugs or white noise headphones.

chelseababy Thu 19-Apr-18 09:36:39

I often give oh a lift between 4 and 5 am. However much we try it is impossible to shut the car doors without making a loud noise. If you pull them to intending to slam them further up the street, a load beeping noise sounds.

Susan56 Thu 19-Apr-18 09:36:53

Our neighbour’s son is exactly the same🙄he also likes to sit in his car and rev the engine just for fun on his days off🙄Annoying as my husband works nights and it is none stop some days.One neighbour has complained,his mother has apologised to everyone in our little road and has spoken to her son but it doesn’t stop him.Hopefully the novelty of his new toy will soon wear off!🤞🏻

BBbevan Thu 19-Apr-18 09:39:37

We lived near a very 'sporty' family. It was not unusual for them all, 3children plus Mum and Dad, to be bouncing on their enormous trampoline , well into the early hours. Plus they had enormous lights for the garden. Everyone muttered about it but I think nothing was ever said .

inishowen Thu 19-Apr-18 09:40:01

I don't see how your neighbours can avoid slamming car doors. It's the only way they'll close! Most of our neighbours go to work and we hear them leave in the mornings. We have good double glazing, which helps.

lovebeigecardigans1955 Thu 19-Apr-18 09:40:51

Horrible, isn't it? In one of our previous houses the young man used to go out to the coal bunker at around midnight. You could clearly hear the shovel on the coal, then the slam of bunker lid, then slam of the door as he went back to the house which happened every night without fail. We didn't get off to sleep until after this little ritual.
This couple had terrible fights too (usually after drinks on Friday nights) and once it sounded as though they were throwing each other against the walls. Frightening. We moved away - the coward's way out perhaps but we couldn't stand it any longer. Your neighbours sound more reasonable though.

Persistentdonor Thu 19-Apr-18 09:44:14

Being a light sleeper myself I have every sympathy with you, and I hope ear plugs might help you.

The thing that I find most conducive to falling back asleep instantly is not to allow myself to become annoyed.

If something wakes me and I leap out of bed ready to scream and yell there is no chance of going back to sleep quickly, but if I just think to myself, "oh good, he's home safe," which doesn't cause a cortisol rush round my body, then I have every chance of slipping back into sleep.

I do hope you manage to resolve your problem - bad sleep can wreck your days, and that would be a pity. flowers

Coconut Thu 19-Apr-18 09:45:58

Years ago I had an issue with next doors teenagers, just after I had put babies to bed. The parents were unconcerned, so I spoke to the boys and explained sleepless nights etc and they were fine after that. My ex MIL had issues with a young couple playing loud rap music till 2 or 3 am: So ... when she got up at 6am to go and do her horse, they got Vivaldi at full throttle !!

Theoddbird Thu 19-Apr-18 09:46:16

Ear plugs...simple smile

jenwren Thu 19-Apr-18 09:46:21

You just can,t win, even living in a retirement complex banging doors are the 'norm' grooooaaaan

GabriellaG Thu 19-Apr-18 09:47:50

Last summer, I had a frequent 'visitor' to the layby outside my holiday flat on the coast. He used to park, get a coffee, return and have the engine running and music playing whilst texting on his mobile.
I got a bit cheesed off when it happened at 7-7.30am so I filled a large jug with water the night before and, hearing the car door slam, I leaned out and threw most of it onto the drivers seat and it was A LOT. I might add that it was a BMW convertible and the hood was always down.
When he returned I called down and said that if he insisted on making a racket he'd get the same treatment. I never saw him again. 😁

Gillcro Thu 19-Apr-18 09:50:28

I had to speak to my neighbour a couple of months ago as they used to have there tv on really loudly(II'm think they are going a little deaf) but it was drowning out our tv, and although we get on well with our neighbour I was quite worried about saying something, but I plucked up the courage and knocked and although they seemed quite surprised, they understood, and a fewdays later the tv noise stopped, so I was glad I spoke to them, and we still get on well.

SussexGirl60 Thu 19-Apr-18 09:51:22

I feel for you. Some people are noisy and some are quiet. I fall into the latter category unfortunately. Sounds like you do too. I don’t think there’s an easy answer.

allule Thu 19-Apr-18 09:55:43

Could they not find a quieter way for car doors to close? Cars are so hi tech these days, it must be possible.
Slamming metal doors always makes me nervous anyway....particularly around children's hands.

tonibolt Thu 19-Apr-18 09:56:30

Other people’s noise is nearly always intrusive, and difficult to deal with. My parents live opposite a small layby, and are disturbed, particularly on summer nights, by groups who have parked there to use the local pub. It isn’t so much the doors shutting, as the interminable “well, goodnight then” “bye!” which seems to go on forever. It doesn’t happen in the winter, as it’s too cold for people to hang about chatting!

Camelotclub Thu 19-Apr-18 10:01:02

Creep out very early and let the air out of his tyres!

Minerva Thu 19-Apr-18 10:04:59

Gracious. I see 7 to 7.30 as being quite late to get up. In Greater London people are chatting on the phone as they run for the train from 6 am and up and down the road looking for parking places within walking distance from the train. Parcel deliveries start at 7 am and workmen are in full swing by 8 am. As for the evening, doors slam, particularly at weekends at any time of night and what sounded like a big row in the street at 2 am turned out to be one man shouting at someone on his phone while sat on my garden wall🙄 Urban foxes too are no respecters of people’s desire to sleep.

Oldwoman70 Thu 19-Apr-18 10:15:48

Minerva Having had to get up very early when working (I used to walk to work by the way so didn't disturb neighbours with slamming car doors grin) I am now loving being able to stay in bed until much later!

juneski Thu 19-Apr-18 10:18:59

I used to leave for work at around 6am and I was always conscious of how much noise I was making in our quiet little cul-de-sac. Unfortunately there is nothing you can do about the sound of a car door. Better one firm slam rather than trying (and failing) several times to close it quietly and then the warning beep go off because it's not closed properly. It was always worse in winter when I either had to scrape off ice or sit with the engine running to clear the windows. Short of parking up the road and annoying someone else, there's very little you can do. It might be worth having a polite word with the son though if he is repeatedly closing doors late at night.

Jaycee5 Thu 19-Apr-18 10:19:01

It isn't petty. My nightmare neighbour was a door slammer. The council got her family more involved to try to reduce the problem but they were all door slammers too. Since she has been gone it has been wonderfully peaceful and quiet. Unfortunately there were builders in her flat on Monday and so we are worried that she will be back but it is not a minor problem and is easily avoidable. Doors can be adjusted so that they don't slam but so many people either seem to be oblivious to the disturbance they cause to others or they actually enjoy it.
I don't think that there is much to gain from remaining friendly with people who do this as they won't take it seriously if there are no consequences for them. Neighbours being a bit cold with them is a fairly mild consequence.