Gransnet forums

AIBU

Neighbours talking in garden til midnight

(69 Posts)
Atqui Sun 15-Jul-18 15:07:38

We have some new neighbours in the (rented) house next door. In this heat we have our bedroom window open wide , and can hear talking from the people in the garden next door . Understandably they want to sit outside in the evening, but AIBU to expect them to continue their loud conversations indoors after 11 pm. It went on until 12.15 last night and we had to close the window. (even then we could still hear them)

MawBroon Sun 15-Jul-18 15:30:22

Talking especially on a Saturday night is hardly unreasonable. These hot nights will not go on, so how about earplugs for the isolated incident?
If it were me I would probably find the complaints coming the other way as it seems I snore -like a train 🚂 !

Riverwalk Sun 15-Jul-18 15:31:57

Yes, you're being very unreasonable!

Unless you had to get up for work this morning, in which case you could have put your head out the window and said so.

Riverwalk Sun 15-Jul-18 15:33:24

We really are a bunch of miseries - a few weeks of good weather and the moaners are rampant!

Greenfinch Sun 15-Jul-18 17:00:31

Are you in a bungalow?If not,surely you can get to sleep against the background of talking even though the voices will carry. We live on a main road and with the windows open the traffic is very noisy even late at night but I can still sleep.Perhaps I am just lucky.

Melanieeastanglia Sun 15-Jul-18 17:26:30

Everyone is different but it doesn't bother me in the slightest when my neighbours have been coming home/talking outside late at night.

The summer won't last long and you'll be able to shut your windows again and not hear the noise.

I'd be wary of falling out with a neighbour over such a trifling matter.

Very heavy traffic goes past my home 24 hours a day and I find I just sleep through it. You'll perhaps get used to the noise of their voices.

FlexibleFriend Sun 15-Jul-18 17:30:46

As long as it's talking then yeah you are being unreasonable, if they're shouting and hollering then No. Try playing some music quietly in the bedroom to drown them out.

Bluegal Sun 15-Jul-18 17:33:09

And so it continues... more complaints! Just enjoy the good weather while it lasts and let your neighbors do the same!

If it gets totally out of hand stick your head out the window and join in the conversation- that will shut them up 🤣🤣.

Not sure why you added (rented) in. Almost like you feel superior or something? I am sure lots of people all over the country are making the most of being outdoors- I know I am.

Nonnie Sun 15-Jul-18 17:37:52

I agree with the others, it is only for a very short time while the weather is so good.

ginny Sun 15-Jul-18 17:49:53

Ditto.

Atqui Sun 15-Jul-18 17:50:07

I don't feel superior , but I probably added the word rental because the tenants come and go. When there is background traffic noise one doesn't notice shouting quite so much , but in a quiet rural area it is more noticeable. I realise now that I Should not have posted this , as it has prompted uneccessary rude replies - Riverwalk, your first response would have been sufficient. Anyway , since posting I have googled " nuisance noise" just out of interest, and most councils consider 11 pm to be a cut off point. I may add that I am not a total "misery" i can understand the occasional party, when considerate neighbours will give due warning. Anyway thank you all for your replies.At least I shan't feel guilty when the grandchildren make a noise in our garden.

BlueBelle Sun 15-Jul-18 17:53:59

Yes I agree too , crime of the century neighbours talking together in the warm night times
I m afraid it’s unreasonable Atqui don’t fall out with neighbours over such a benign thing of course people will stay out on these warm and barmy nights and they’re not going to just sit looking at each other, they will talk, put some ear plugs in, put a radio on very low, shut your window, change rooms, but don’t moan about it

MissAdventure Sun 15-Jul-18 17:54:02

We have some very loud neighbours who have moved into our area.
They are friendly, helpful, and actually really nice, but boy are they loud!
Its quite difficult to remember how nice they are when they're all whooping and laughing and screaming till all hours.
Whatever they're on, I'd like some!

sodapop Sun 15-Jul-18 19:00:15

Sorry Atqui another one who thinks you are being a bit unreasonable. I know this hot weather makes it difficult to sleep and makes me irritable. Combination of circumstances I think makes things seem worse than they are. Don't fall out with your neighbours over this.

Bluegal Sun 15-Jul-18 19:00:23

Not at all Atqui. You posted asking a question AIBU. Most people felt, in these circumstances, you were. Don’t think anyone meant to be rude.

I hear what you say about noise abatement but tbh I don’t think any council would bother themselves with a little extended “noise” in such circumstances. They would be fighting a losing battle anyway. Once the weather changes - problem solved! The 11 pm guideline is for ongoing problems such as construction, continuous loud music and such like.

As you say your grandchildren may annoy your neighbours if they are having a lie-in! Live and let live I say. Don’t take offence though.

travelsafar Sun 15-Jul-18 19:13:04

Everysummer we have this from neighbours around us but as GN posters say it is such a rarity, i just let it go.How often do we get an evening that you can sit out till that time of night.I find the fire works more annoying in the lead up to Halloween, bonfire night, xmas and NYE.

Grandma70s Sun 15-Jul-18 19:14:39

I don't think it's at all unreasonable to be annoyed by audible talking late at night. I would be. I wouldn’t complain, though, because it is important to have a friendly relationship with neighbours if possible.

grannyactivist Sun 15-Jul-18 19:17:47

Atqui I don't think you're being unreasonable, but neither do I think your neighbours are. I'm sure it's frustrating being kept awake after 11pm, but at the same time there is no malice in your neighbours wanting to sit out and enjoy the balmy nights. I'm afraid it's one of those situations where perhaps you need to just accept you'll get to sleep a little later than normal, but hopefully catch up by sleeping later in the mornings. Anyone who's camped knows that noises at night carry much further, but I expect your neighbours have no idea they are disturbing you.

MeltingMacaron Sun 15-Jul-18 19:28:53

The kind of thing shift workers encounter all the time. They will be trying to sleep in the daytime when it's even hotter.

I recommend Boots Muffles earplugs. Brilliant little cotton/wax plugs which mould to the shape of the ear. They do soften more quickly in hot weather so keep a spare pair on the bedside cabinet.

petra Sun 15-Jul-18 19:39:56

I love to hear people out in their gardens late at night.
We spend too many months with our doors and curtains shut.
I lived in a hot country for some years and that was what I loved, life didn't stop when you had the evening meal.
My next door neighbours had their garden lit in such a way that it was normal to see them gardening at midnight.

HildaW Sun 15-Jul-18 20:09:39

Such a situation can get annoying and when we are all having trouble getting decent sleep our tolerance for all things annoying decreases.
We've had a similar problem and it was also with tenants who practically camped out of doors all day....they had made the house a complete tip so it was inevitable.
There can be a difference between the neighbourliness of tenants who come an go and have no vested interest in laying down good relationships (needless to say many are lovely!) and those who are staying a long time and are usually buyers. Its not a snob thing....just a fact - tenancies are for fixed terms. We had two lovely young couples followed by two less than!
Its not unreasonable to feel some people are showing little consideration for others.....unfortunately when its not immoral or illegal you just have to learn to tune it out!

oldbatty Sun 15-Jul-18 20:15:44

there is no need to be quite so rude to the OP is there?

it was a reasonable enquiry and its like the bloody Gods have spoken from some people.

Atqui Sun 15-Jul-18 20:25:27

Thank you Hilda and old batty. I am not thinking of complaining unless it's a regular thing; I don't want to fall out with them. I only googled environmental sites out of curiosity to see if anyone else agreed that 11 pm was a reasonable time. When my GC are here- a infrequent event due to distance, I will not let them go,into the garden until 9 at the weekend as I know how precious a lie in is when you are working. Yes ,live and let live , but have a bit of consideration I say.

Atqui Sun 15-Jul-18 20:27:12

Anyway, it seems that the consensus is that I am being unreasonable, and Imdid ask!!

oldbatty Sun 15-Jul-18 20:37:07

I know you didn't ask for suggestions but I would just have a chat with them . I think they are unaware of how noise travels.

For what its worth, we are " entertained" be screaming children on trampolines morning ,noon and night!!