Making extra work

Elegran, there is much we both agree on in both our above posts. However, I feel that if anyone appreciates and genuinely feels for their husband or partner, they would not hold that person up to ridicule on a forum such as this, as some regularly do.

Thank you for taking the time out from clearing out your gutters to main splain how we women should treat our husbands and partners. However, I have to reiterate that a similar slur has been committed against women this time on "Clicky Groups" where David has made the sweeping statement that women are far more likely to form cliques and hostile ones at that If we are to achieve the egalitarian vision of the world that you so desire Grandad, I wondered whether you could put in an appearance on that thread and point out to David if he genuinely feels for his wife or partner he would not cast women in such a negative light, thus holding them up to ridicule on a public forum. So could I suggest you adjust your "Misandry and Equalities Peaked Cap" take a deep breath, inhale and exhale and make a statement to that effect over there.

Food for thought Grandad if you do not appear to have an even handed approach to such matters you may be removed from your post by the seemingly invisible groups who monitor such sites as Gransnet and Mumsnet for their blatant Misandry and to a much lesser degree Misogyny.

Equality for all we all want to live in a better world

I would be cross hatpev but then I haven't had a husband to annoy me for a long time and am not at all sorry about that!

Of course the next time you are expecting guests he needs to change the bed and prepare the room for their arrival or, if he thinks it okay for them to sleep in dirty sheets, you can chat about this together...

The same with the bathroom, which I know can take ages to clean depending on how thorough you want to be - tiles polished or not etc.

Ask him what he thinks. Its certainly not you Hatpev but if you're the only one who thinks guests need clean sheets?

How would we learn how we should behave without all this mansplaining Terribull?

I do think that, in general, women get the rough end of the deal, both in private and public life.

However, this tendency does not reflect the partnerships of every person and in a way I can understand why Grandad1943 takes exception to some of the posts that he sees as having a bit of a go at men. I have to admit that if I was aware that my husband had been on a site such as this complaining about me, stereotyping my behaviour or making fun of me I would be very hurt.

But then perhaps women are used to their opinions and feelings being laughed off or ignored, particularly in the workplace, whereas men are not so likely to have experienced it and are therefore more surprised when it happens to them.

wives who have posted in this thread love and appreciate their husbands immensely
Elegran; you could have fooled me!
How come "hubbies" are absent from most of these arguments? Surely they too are Netters, and therefore entitled to have a view on such serious matters as bathroom/bedroom etiquette. Or are they always being told to shut up and "go and clean come gutters!"?
And finally, nobody has shown the slightest concern of what poor little Moggy must feel like when banned from jumping into the bed, made or unmade!

Does anyone in this day and age actually call their DH "hubby"?

Mine wouldn't touch Gransnet with a bargepole.

I joke about DH on here but I would never ridicule him.

Soon three won't be anything light hearted on Gransnet. It's getting far too serious with posters constantly being jumped on.

Mine wouldn't touch it with a bargepole either.

It has been stated on this thread that "wives who have posted in this thread love and appreciate their husbands immensely."

If the above is the case, then why would anyone who loves their husband or partner immensely wish to hold them up to public ridicule on a forum such as this.

I believe that the posts that are made in such manner state far more about the person submitting the post than it does in regard to the person the post is targeted at.

Regarding those that seem to object to men participating on this forum, then they are obviously objecting to equality within the sexes. On a forum that has so many threads devoted to the equality of women, it would appear that some would not wish to see that as a two-way process which is to the benefit and understanding of everyone.

Mine wouldn't touch Gransnet with a bargepole
I thought someone would pick up that bit of bait! We've done "hubby' a while ago, along with "The Wife" , but why the bargepole? I smell rather nice after winning that jar of "Yankee Candle" in the hamper; it's the "pioneer of decadent aromas." Hubby should try some; you never know where it could lead.

Hubby should try some; you never know where it could lead.

A&E. Scented candles bring on his asthma.

I am arriving at the conclusion that to be on GN you have to park your sense of humour at the door.

What happened to laughing at ourselves, and the silly things that happen in daily family life.

GrannyGravy13, yes laugh and share with others events that you have made by your own actions, but do ridicule others especially when they are not on this forum to reply.

Yes, my husband is far too immersed in the real world to come on to a site like GN or MN, particularly to lecture women on so called misandry, he likes women far too much for that. Although he does appreciate some of the snippets I read out from both sites from time to time, in particular he appreciates the humour and is not -- so far up his own a***e that he would take offence-- likely to be overly distressed at a dig about specific characteristics that could apply to pretty much anyone, but in the thread in question they happen to be male.

Yes I echo your sentiments Jalima, oooh hope that doesn't make us cliquey, apparently as women we are prone to form them, cliques that is. We know that because it was mansplained to us on another thread. I did want to have a little cry when I first read that casual misogyny can be so very wounding, but I'm over it now, I've seen my therapist, we talked it through and I've moved on

Coincidently the thread just below this one is "things that annoy me" someone should redirect the contributors there to here I don't think it should be me though, apparently I'm prone to ranting. Jaaalima where are you? can you explain the difference between a rant and a mansplain, can the latter ever turn into a rant, clarification required

Another duel rant from TerriBull**

Never stops

Goodness me, if anyone could see those last two posts as a "duel rant" it has to be Grandad.

Gonegirl - I'm absolutely with you, the use of "hubby" as a way of naming my husband/life partner make me feel nauseous.

A friend of mine's DD refers to her DH as The Hubster.

I am whispering this post but if I have guests stay just one night then I leave the beds, because sons often stay over if we have been celebrating anything/drinking and for them I reverse the bottom sheets, flip the duvets over and ensure they get the pillows that weren't slept on. They aren't aware the bedding has been used, and are unlikely to do bed inspections before falling in! One job less to do!

If I have guests due, I tend to strip and wash/iron the bedding a few days before they arrive and then those doors stay shut. OH isn't likely to sleep on a freshly made guest bed. I'd be very cross if he did.

You are NOT being unreasonable Hatpev I find all the effort required in making up fresh beds quite tiring.

The very thought of visitors not having clean sheets makes me feel slightly sick.

Yes, me too. A few years ago, just that happened when we stayed with an acquaintance (friend of family) who kindly offered to put us up after a family wedding. The sheets and pillow cases were slightly grubby, there were pubes in the bed <vomit> and the dog had obviously been sleeping on it too.

She made us the most wonderful salmon and scrambled eggs breakfast though, with home made jam on the table and freshly baked bread.

"Although he does appreciate some of the snippets I read out ..." (quoting Terribull)

Yep. My old feller definitely pricked his ears up when I told him the majority of GNrs' husbands wash their hands after having a quick pee. Grubby so and so! Doubt if it will make any difference though.

thread post about a thread!

Yes. Day6. I find bed making tiring as well. Gone are the days when I could do it in minutes. I hate changing the sheets and duvet cover on our own bed let alone a stream of visitors.

We use our mobile home in our garden for visitors and if they're going to treat us like a holiday camp, I suggest they book in and request clean linen.

Or are they always being told to shut up and "go and clean some gutters!"?
Rufus I gave DH an order before I went out this morning - on no account was he to climb a ladder to inspect the gutters which were cleaned out by a professional yesterday. He would want to know if they did it properly as he was out when they did the job!

I blame their mothers for their toilet etiquette .
It took a long time to train a certain DH to put the lid down.