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Dummy Blind

(107 Posts)
lincolnimp Sat 09-Feb-19 17:21:07

Perhaps I am being unreasonable but I cannot understand why parents take, and share, photos of their children with a dummy stuck in their mouth.
Not only young babies either, some much older toddlers and pre schoolers
Even 'celebrities' don't seem to mind if their children are seen out in public, and therefore photographed with these appalling things stuck in their mouths.
I am not totally anti dummy , there are some young babies who need them to help with dropping off to sleep, or if there are long term illnesses, but so many parents seem to be Dummy Blind

MissAdventure Sat 09-Feb-19 23:05:25

My daughter gave up of her own accord.
I would watch her having to sit on her hands to make sure the fingers never crept into her mouth.
Sometimes they would, and she'd shake her head and wave her hand around.. smile

Farmor15 Sun 10-Feb-19 03:16:22

I’m another one who doesn’t like photos of babies/toddlers with dummies, (or sucking on a bottle) but as the title of this thread suggests, many parents are “dummy blind”. From the replies here, it would seem that lots of people have no issue with it, so everyone can have their own opinion🙂
My OH smokes, and I don’t like photos of him with a cigarette in his mouth and I don’t like photos of myself eating.
Even though things may be a part of everyday life, one may not like having them recorded in a photo.

sarahcyn Sun 10-Feb-19 09:53:51

Good tip for quietly ditching the dummy: make a little pinhole in the dummy. It changes the way it feels in the child's mouth and they soon lose interest.

According to the Lullaby Trust and the Infant Sleep unit at Durham University, research suggest use of a pacifier may reduce the risk of cot death. But the risk of cot death diminishes steadily after 4 months.

maryhoffman37 Sun 10-Feb-19 09:58:05

3 children, five grandchildren, no dummies. I hate seeing photos of beautiful babies with them in their mouths.

Urmstongran Sun 10-Feb-19 09:59:32

Thanks for that tip sarahcyn I will pass it on to DD2 whose 2y old baby loves her dummies! It seems an holistic way to curb the habit without upset. Brilliant!

GrannyBettie Sun 10-Feb-19 10:11:26

None of my grandchildren have had dummies and they all suck their thumbs. Not a good look on 12 year olds. My niece gave her daughter a dummy then told her that the 'dummy fair' would collect it (at a given time). It was handed over with no problem.

Esspee Sun 10-Feb-19 10:12:43

OP, with you 100% of the way.

I notice than children with dummies usually have parents glued to their phones.

Aepgirl Sun 10-Feb-19 10:22:42

I know that dummies are now safer than they used to be (bigger edge to stop the baby swallowing it) but they are so ugly and look as if the child is hermetically sealed. I sometimes wonder if they were removed, the child would take flight and whizz round the room, like a balloon that is let go.

I was a thumb-sucker, as was my daughter, but we both have perfect teeth.

4allweknow Sun 10-Feb-19 10:23:46

None of my children would accept a dummy, just spat them out. They did though take to finger and thumb sucking. If a child is inclined to need comfort from sucking a dummy that is much less harmful than a hard finger, causing much less damage to teeth.

mcem Sun 10-Feb-19 10:32:56

GS had a dummy but accepted that when he was a 'big boy' he and mummy would tie it to agree on the garden and the dummy fairy would take it away for a little baby.
His sister didn't have one and is still (8) sucking her thumb.
A sweeping disdainful generalisation about dummies/ parents/ phones!

Anniebach Sun 10-Feb-19 10:49:20

Didn’t give them to my children, if parents do it’s their choice , doesn’t mean they are bad parents .

Daisyboots Sun 10-Feb-19 10:50:24

I too was born sucking my thumb but there isn't a photo with me in it sucking my thumb. It was a comfort when I was tired or bored. It did help in infant and junior schools because if I was seen sucking my thumb in class I was given harder work to do as obviously I had finished what had been set. I carried on sucking my thumb at night but never during the day from the age of 10 or 11. It never affected the shape of my mouth or teeth and even now in my 70s people remark on my even teeth.
I have always thought dummies were a soother to help babies to sleep and some of my children wanted them and some didnt. I really don't think running around as a child with a dummy in their mouth is helpful. They talk with their dummies in their mouth which doesnt help their speech and in my wider family some have ended up with mishapen teeth.

Anniebach Sun 10-Feb-19 10:50:55

I have a cousin in her sixties, she still sucks her thumb, not in public and not in photographs

Annaram1 Sun 10-Feb-19 10:55:44

My daughter had difficulty sleeping and the doctor suggested we gave her a dummy, She used them until the age of 3 when she gave up by herself. My son spat it out when we tried to give him one. Both have lovely teeth.
On board a ferry once I spotted a 6ft man asleep on deck with his thumb in his mouth! Gross!

TerriBull Sun 10-Feb-19 10:57:29

I echo mcm, GD didn't have a dummy, just turned 9 now she still sucks her thumb when she's tired. GS had one, he's 4, several years ago the dummy was discarded. Once upon a time I didn't like them and now when I see them on other babies and tots, I think of my GS when he was a baby and toddler and think aaah they've got their "plug" in, I have to admit I've changed my point of view on them. Mine didn't have dummies but they sucked their thumbs for a very long time.

Happysexagenarian Sun 10-Feb-19 11:03:42

Our children had dummies but I always removed it before taking a photo, they usually didn't mind. They can be a sanity saver for parents, but we have often received photos of GC with dummies which have rather spoiled an otherwise lovely picture.

alibongo23 Sun 10-Feb-19 11:04:21

Quite agree Tangerine : each to their own. My friends daughter clung onto her dummy until my friend ‘misplaced’ it. Her daughter then chewed the corner of her quilt cover and took it everywhere with her eventually without the quilt inside, then a corner cut off to leave a scrap of material! It was horrible and chewed but eventually forgotten at 3 years old smile

trendygran Sun 10-Feb-19 11:06:19

I have always hated dummies and my children didn’t have them at all. I find it hard to believe how many 2 to 3 year olds seem to still have them when I see them in town. My younger daughter did suck her thumb for quite a long time,but it didn’t seem to do any harm ,thankfully.

TerriBull Sun 10-Feb-19 11:10:11

Just remembered the other week when I was sorting out some pjs for my grandson, he was with me when we were going through his drawer, we came across a dummy still in it's packaging, when he saw it he said "why have you still got a dodo, I don't need one anymore, I'm a big boy now" I think children often reach that sort of opinion themselves. Maybe not so with thumb sucking because it's often done unconsciously.

redheadh Sun 10-Feb-19 11:20:24

I really dislike seeing toddlers and even some older children with them. It interferes with their speech and can affect their teeth.

quizqueen Sun 10-Feb-19 11:22:07

I never used a dummies or bottles and my daughters have followed suit with their children.

missdeke Sun 10-Feb-19 11:24:29

Why do people fret about things that don't concern them? Use dummies if you want to, don't use them if you don't, no-one else's business.

GoldenAge Sun 10-Feb-19 11:29:26

The problem with dummies is that they are addictive - the sucking reflex is very powerful and for a baby, the more satisfaction from sucking it can get, the better - the upshot is that dummies are used to put the baby/child in a state of satisfaction BUT the child’s satisfaction is only being achieved in the service of the parent/childminder for whom the child is taking a back seat. And whilst the mouth is shut the child can not be interacting verbally nor can it be encouraged to develop speech. So dummies actually retard children’s development but make life easier for the parent/childminder - it’s a atraightforward equation ... oh and by the way, who said the child must be satisfied all the time? I see lots of threads about children these days wanting immediate gratification and maybe there’s a connection between having a dummy until one is three years old and having a temper tantrum at six because of having to share a toy.

madmum38 Sun 10-Feb-19 11:32:31

My four children all had to go into special care when they were born as were early but would go in to see them and stay every day til late but the nurses had always given them a test stuffed with cotton wool and then asked me to buy dummies because they each cried a lot. The 3rd one was born 8 weeks early and she needed one to strengthen her sucking motion because she couldn’t do it and was having to be tube fed, dummies definitely have their used

madmum38 Sun 10-Feb-19 11:32:55