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I don’t want to go to the wedding

(34 Posts)
mande Sun 14-Apr-19 09:41:45

My friend’s daughter is getting married next month and I am invited to the wedding as I expected. I have decided not to go. I will be on my own and I will hate it. Our other friends will be with their husbands and I will be the usual gooseberry. I have been to other weddings in their family and I have always felt like the odd one out.
I should say that I have recently discovered that I am on the autism spectrum so that probably accounts for why I find these big events so difficult. It is also the reason why I think that this time I am not going to force myself to suffer the day. I want to do what I want this time.
I would actually love to be the sort of person who could enjoy herself at these events and I am sad that I can’t. Am I being unreasonable to put myself first this time.
Please don’t be harsh!

Spinnaker Thu 27-May-21 23:17:30

Are today's responses relevant two years on confused ?

PinkCakes Fri 28-May-21 08:14:41

Perhaps buy a gift or put a voucher in a Congratulations card, and explain to your friend you don't feel up to going. If she's a true friend she'll understand.

PinkCakes Fri 28-May-21 08:15:14

Oh I've only just noticed when the OP put this on here.....

alchemilla Sun 20-Jun-21 21:31:07

Zombie thread, but worth a think.

jeanie99 Sat 26-Jun-21 00:46:15

It's your life, please don't suffer an evening of feeling totally uncomfortable.
All you need to do is ring the couple explain you would love to come and see them married but can't cope with the evening do.
Of course they won't pressure you into going, at least I hope not.
Send on the present.

Blencathra Sat 26-Jun-21 07:53:43

If you want to discuss being a guest at a wedding start a thread yourself. OP had this dilemma 2 years ago! Not only did she come to a decision but the wedding is long over!
It is hardly relevant at the moment when weddings are either postponed or so small that a guest that is a friend of the mother is unlikely to be asked anyway.

aggie Sat 26-Jun-21 08:07:21

How do these old threads get resurrected? ? ? ?

aggie Sat 26-Jun-21 08:08:02

There does seem a rash of old threads at the moment. !