DH was 'volunteered' to cook crab at an event

They need to get in caterers as these (poor) crabs need to be prepared and cooked correctly. Just say no, you are not prepared to do it.

I think he should speak up and let them know that he is not doing it. Honestly it takes ages to dress crabs as we used to live near a fishing place and we often had them for tea. My dad used to cook them (which is a horrible job - cos they are still alive!) and my mam did the preparing. Dont let him be pushed into a corner on this one. Why can't they get someone from outside (professional) to come along and do it. That is just not fair on both of you and you have every right to be peeved - I would be. x

Boiling crabs alive is unbearably cruel.
Can’t they eat something else?

In charge of a 'bbq' I could accept. Cleaning out one crab let alone numerous ? NO.

Is it a joke?

Does your DH have some kind of expertise in preparing Crab?

50?!!!!! When you are supposed to be there as guests enjoying the occasion?

What kind of person is organising this?

Complete madness! Say NO!

Also, I would be unable to do it, so I would never expect anyone else to do it unless they were a Chef or a Fishmonger! I couldn't possibly kill a crab. I simply don't eat them because of the cruel way they are boiled alive.

He has been asked to cook them FOR the Friday night event, not AT the Friday night event.
I think they would need to be done in advance.
As whywhywhy says, they are put in the pot live. They then need cooking, cooling and picking.
Hopefully he will be part of a team who have previous experience.

You need to say no to doing the crabs as you could become liable if anyone had a reaction or feel ill. Stupid idea to have volunteers cooking and preparing crabs.

He could tell them he doesn't agree with the cruelty of cooking live crabs. I couldn't do it.

Living on the Canadian coast (which I assume the OP does) they are most likely all well versed in the preparation of all kinds of seafood.

But I think they should enlist single men only.

I agree with Nansnet. If there are a few of them working together it will be part of the reunion, and they can clean up or be a mess together. Otherwise it strikes me someone is 'playing on good nature'. It is his reunion too. Also you would not be the only 'spare lady' if the men made a little work party up, their guests would also be solo and you could mingle.

Or, you could skip the Friday do yourself and just go to the Sunday event.

You can't be certain that they are to be served hot. No one in their right minds would expect an amateur to cook, prepare and serve 50 hot crabs. If that is the case then the commercial fishermen should be doing it as they will no doubt be experienced at it (referencing here Rick Stein and Keith Floyd who often ate fish and crustaceans on the boat when they went fishing)

Presumably your DH is one of many on the list to prepare the crabs?
Even so, without an expert on hand to show how it’s done, it’s a health risk.
Horrible job anyway, and I would have refused it point blank.

I would also refuse to eat crab or lobster, come to that, when it’s an appalling way to kill a creature.

Kiki2 - AIBU is 'am I being unreasonable'. There are a lot of acronyms used on here and if you look at the top you will see a list and Acronyms is the last on it.

Update...

We do live on the north coast of BC, and many in town are familiar with cooking and cleaning crabs. In fact the organizers (part of the original graduating class) know that my hubby and a few others have propane crab cookers for cooking outside, and the crabs are donated by a fisherman classmate.

However the mess and time is very impractical for serving hot freshly cooked crab at a golf clubhouse. DH has contacted the other volunteer, the crab will arrive early at either our or someone else's house. The boys can cook the crab while socializing, clean them, and bring them cold over ice to the event. If people want crab at the event, they can pick/crack them there.

One of his classmates came over for a visit yesterday, and it seems there is a bit of disorganization for this event. But for a small town, they are expecting over 50 graduates, plus guests so over 100 people.

He is happy to assist knowing it can be done in advance, so we can go to the event dressed nicely and ready to socialize. We did pay for the event, which includes a Friday cocktail meet and greet, Saturday dinner/dance and Sunday BBQ.

I personally find crab a big mess. We do occasionally get them, hubby cooks and cleans them outside , then picks the meat after I lay a large cloth in the kitchen. I thought it was pretty cheeky for the planners to ask, and would have thought the caterers at the event could be asked to cook them, but apparently they don't have the capability in the smaller kitchen of the golf course club house.

Problem resolved, but I won't be eating crab at the event!

Simply say NO ,,,stating that he has never cooked crab and has no idea how to do it so as not to kill anybody with food poisoning …..make it sound like a definitive remark and not just being crabby (sorry) BUT I never eat them or lobster, or anything else that would need cooking alive …..it is horrible ,,,poor things ...but I am just squeamish I guess ….

I would seriously consider saying no! For a few reasons but the most important one being health and safety and food hygiene regulations . Is your husband trained in any way to do the job?
If anyone gets sick after the meal they will always blame the food and your husband could be in the firing line for all of it.
I would be livid being volunteered for such a job.

As for objections to cooking live crab, I also don't like the idea. Crab can be killed quickly, just like lobster, with a knife then gutted and cooked. This way they cooking in cleaner water, and the process is more humane.

CanadianGran I think you are being very kind to just say it is "pretty cheeky for the planners to ask". I think it is a terrible imposition. Frankly I would refuse, but as your husband has experience with crab cooking he no doubt will feel confident. But what a chore! Like you, I think it is a messy thing to eat as well. I do not eat it now but my last experience, many years ago, was lobster in the States and it was a special Lobster Restaurant. We were all given plastic aprons and ate from the table, which was covered in a plastic cloth. At the end our aprons were places with the bits on the table and everything was gathered up in the tablecloth and thrown away. Very well organised! But to me, it seemed the best way to eat either lobster or crab. The chef kindly came and taught us Brits how to eat our lobster so that we got all the meat out!

I do hope some fun is had during this arduous job. I hope that the whole weekend goes well and that the organisers haven't made any other strange requests of people. I certainly wouldn't eat the crab - no offence to your husband, but it would be messy anyway!

CanadianGran.
How memory works! You have made me remember something from my childhood.
My mother was born on and lived on the Square of a pretty village. It has been in several films, just by the way. Anyway, on the corner was a fishmonger, fruiterer and greengrocers. When mum had grown up, married and moved to the next, not pretty and not famous village, the old man at this shop had a stroke. My mum decided to go and help him out. Little did she know, he needed her to kill the crab! It was not often they had them and only on order. The fishmonger used to do it with a steel skewer straight into the brain so the creature knew nothing. Done swiftly it was humane. As my mum married a farmer she had to be strong and get on with it! I have to say, I would not be able to do it. I am in fact vegetarian!

Are you sure its not a prank theyre playing on you

Talking about 'disorganisation' of the military kind this time. I went with a party of Air Force Cadets to Vancouver one year as guests of the Ogopogo Squadron.

Canada is such a beautiful country and my father once seriously thought of emigrating there.

It was a very long flight and when we landed, we'd been awake and in the air well in excess of 39 hours.

We landed, glassy-eyed but our hosts (or rather the organisers, all in their 60's and ex-military men) gave us no time at all to rest or even have food and drink but took us to a lengthy official reception (lots of speeches from dignitaries, no refreshments) then we went to look at a gravel pit. Yes, you read that right.

Exhausted and jet lagged, the cadets nevertheless rose at 5am next day hoping to go across the border to Seattle, to an air base and famous air museum.
This was to be the highlight of the whole trip.

En route the elderly bus broke down but instead of re-arranging the trip with private cars as was suggested, they took us instead to several other boring places the teenagers didn't want to see.

It was, as far as our whole squadron was concerned, a total fiasco for which we paid many thousands of dollars.

The only good thing was the Ogopogo cadets and their parents who were lovely and very interested in Maori culture.
My son taught them a haka and why its done. When we were leaving, the boys broke into a spontaneous haka in the airport, brought it to a complete standstill and were cheered to the rafter at the end.

When we got home, a reporter asked a young girl cadet if she could encapsulate the experience.

She said, "I learned what SNAFU means."

{grin]