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AIBU

We are NOT ‘you guys’

(156 Posts)
GinJeannie Wed 07-Aug-19 15:08:09

AIBU in absolutely hating being referred to as ‘you guys’? DH and myself really resent being called this. It’s bad enough when staff in shops, hotels, etc use this awful phrase but now I’ve had a text from DD using it. We are her parents, Mum and Dad, a family nickname even, all highly preferable to this. I replied with a request to please not use that phrase for us and did at least get a thumbs up emoji by return! Be interested to hear what other GN feel!

Sealover Thu 08-Aug-19 12:12:22

Hurrah, I'm not a freak! I cannot stand being called "you guys", thought I might be being a bit picky until I read these posts.

Barmeyoldbat Thu 08-Aug-19 12:16:01

I really don't mind, you can call e guys, Mrs or by my first name but not sweetheart, sweetie, or dear. In Asia I am mamma and Mr Barmey is papa

oldgaijin Thu 08-Aug-19 12:20:36

I dislike it intensely...when did I have the sex change?

absthame Thu 08-Aug-19 12:27:42

I also hate it on two levels: it is slovenly and lazy speak and also guy is a masculine term and my wife is simply not an adjunct to me, she is a person in her own right and should be addressed as such.

Musicgirl Thu 08-Aug-19 12:31:33

I am not a man nor is my friend so when we were addressed as you guys in a shop it did seem somewhat odd. Like many others l do not like Ms and l really do not like all these first name terms we are supposed to use. Mr, Mrs, Miss or Dr are fine by me. In my bank everyone has a badge with their first names on only. They are not our friends and l cannot see anything wrong with a badge saying Mr J. Smith or Mrs A. Brown. If l could actually ever get to see my bank manager l can just imagine the reaction if l said "Hi, John" rather than "good morning Mr. Smith." I suppose everyone is encouraged to be very casual these days but is a little bit of formality so very wrong?

Worthingpatchworker Thu 08-Aug-19 12:45:40

I don’t like the term. It’s too chummy and best left for young people in classrooms. If you wouldn’t use it to address the Queen and family by use it for strangers?

CleoPanda Thu 08-Aug-19 12:53:05

How odd! I really like the term “you guys”. Many younger people use the term with their friends/ colleagues etc, so it feels as if we’re not being left out or treated as too old for that term. I never cared for “folks” which is definitely an Americanism and reminds me of “old folks”. My only real dislike is “Hun” which somehow irritates, belittles and offends me simultaneously!!

MissAdventure Thu 08-Aug-19 13:01:05

We'll all be speaking like robots to each other soon, for fear of offending.

grandtanteJE65 Thu 08-Aug-19 13:06:32

To me guys are adolescent boys, who could just as well be addressed as lads.

I too am annoyed at being addressed or spoken of as a guy. I am after all a woman.

I have no objection at all to madam, it is after all a term of respect.

midgey, if a chiropodist or anyone else addressed me as "sweetie" I would jokingly point out that I certainly am not their sweetie!

kircubbin2000 Thu 08-Aug-19 13:06:35

I don't like being called dear.Sounds like little old lady.

Jan66 Thu 08-Aug-19 13:12:43

Doesn't bother me. Its used quite often in conversation. Never thought of it as being offensive as there are more things to be offended about.

Retired65 Thu 08-Aug-19 13:14:05

I agree, I hate the term 'guys' being used for women. the term apparently is now acceptable as a gender-neutral address. I consider it to be 'slang'. It is even used by teachers at the school I work at to address the children. The deputy head uses the term a lot.

Interestingly we are not suppose to use the term 'love', which I have no problems with. (I live in West Yorkshire)

See www.theguardian.com/world/shortcuts/2018/aug/01/hi-guys-whats-wrong-with-this-greeting

Nanny41 Thu 08-Aug-19 13:15:51

Doesnt worry me,its better than "you people"

Riggie Thu 08-Aug-19 13:24:42

Not a term I like. Whenever it's been used towards me, the use of "you" by itself would have worked. I dont expect madam unless in a very formal setting. Most of the time theres no need to add anything. I was "madam-ed all over the place by an assistant in a cafe the other day and it wasnt necessary. Maybe I should have "sir-ed" the assistant??

Nanny41 Thu 08-Aug-19 13:26:25

I am from the North West too and I know I am home when people say "love"

Nanny41 Thu 08-Aug-19 13:30:25

We have people begging outside our shops here, and one day a lady sitting on the pavement said "hello Mother",I couldnt believe the cheek,apart from the fact I could be her grandmother,maybe it was meant to be a compliment!

Bijou Thu 08-Aug-19 13:39:40

Just because I am old and disabled I don’t like people calling me dear as though I am mental. Also I object to being called by my forename by strangers over the phone.
When I was young neighbours were called Mr and Mrs. Never knew their forenames. Now I know all their forenames and not their surnames..

Shirls52000 Thu 08-Aug-19 13:45:09

I really don’t mind because it shows that people are being friendly and we could do with a lot more of that in this world ?

Saggi Thu 08-Aug-19 13:45:15

You have too little real stuff to worry about!......as long as I’m called in time for me dinner ..I dont mind what I’m called. Oy you..usually covers it!

PernillaVanilla Thu 08-Aug-19 13:53:03

I hate it too. At university our professor used to call us "Chaps and Chapesses" which always made me smile

Melanie123 Thu 08-Aug-19 13:56:03

I hate it too. I’m not a guy!

Patreesh Thu 08-Aug-19 14:05:51

I'm certainly not a guy but really have no problem with this term of phrase.

leeds22 Thu 08-Aug-19 14:36:45

Quite like 'you guys', just as well as DH uses it a lot. Dislike Madam but ma'am is OK. And I really object to phone callers using my first name, probably because I really dislike my first name!

cornergran Thu 08-Aug-19 14:56:02

We’re all different and irritated by different things which fascinates me. I’m another who doesn’t want to be called a guy. Really can’t see why someone greeting anyone else can’t just say ‘good morning’ rather than ‘good morning guys’ or when asking if a group is ready to order to ask just that, the ‘guys’ isn’t needed. A friend deals with it by smiling and saying quietly ‘I am not and have never been a guy’. She then simply doesn’t respond if addressed again as a guy. Me? I let it pass over me but no, I don’t like it. Having said that the radiographer who called me ‘dearie’ three times in three minutes had a serious glare and a request to use my name.

Legs55 Thu 08-Aug-19 15:05:11

Hate "you guys" & being addressed by my first name by strangers, I've always been known by my middle name & ask health professionals to do so where appropriate. I do answer to my first name for medical appointments etc.

I hate Ms, I'm Mrs & have been for 42 years Married 3 times, Divorced twice & now Widowedangry

I call everybody "love" as I'm a Yorkshire girl, now I'm in the West Country it's my lovely or my lover which is less common now, my lovely I like, makes me smilesmile

Hun I've got used to & even buddy which is very Devon. As long as it's respectful not rude you can call me anything, whether I choose to respond....hmm