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Cannot get to sleep!!

(64 Posts)
whywhywhy Thu 26-Sep-19 02:27:55

I am getting worse as I get older. I just cannot get to sleep and it isn't made any better by the fact that my husband can just drop off in seconds. He says that I "talk" myself out of sleep!! I have tried Nytol without any success. Read till really late and kept off the computer. Knitted till my arms ached and even tried going to bed soon. Right now it is 2.25am and here I am on the computer wide awake. I don't sleep during the day either but I do feel like crap when I have a really bad night. Has anyone got any solutions. Maybe it is just me awake at this time in the morning and the rest of the world (northern hemisphere) are all awake. Help cos I think I am going mad!x

GabriellaG54 Tue 01-Oct-19 14:41:07

I haven't any medical solutions and I'm a woman who can sleep anywhere any time if I feel like a nap.
I'm often awake very early or late but never sleep deprived, however, I can honestly say that This Works Sleep Spray, when I do use it, works every time.
It was part of the M&S beauty advent calendar 2019 and a small spritz on my pillow meant that I absolutely couldn't stay awake...and believe me, I tried just to rubbish it's claims.
Only spritz once on the left and right sides of one side of your pillow which ensures that when you turn over, you will still breathe it in.
If you spritz in the middle, that is the part your head lies on and you won't be breathing it in.

NotSpaghetti Sun 29-Sep-19 16:39:54

Try this:

wildswan16 Sat 28-Sep-19 15:50:35

A mug of chamomile tea, then put the timer on an audio book for two hours - very rarely still awake when it switches off.

Make sure the book isn't too exciting - no "whodunnits". A nice family saga is best.

Listening to the story means you aren't thinking about life events that keep you awake.

lucky77 Sat 28-Sep-19 15:01:46

I use these Melatonin gummies link below take 30-60 minutes before your usual bedtime, I think as we get older our natural levels of melatonin drop, worth a try you only need one a night and there are 3 months supply in a container.

whywhywhy Sat 28-Sep-19 00:58:40

Thank you everyone for your replies. I will be trying some of them, especially telling myself just how tired I am before bedtime. I think a lot has to do with stuff I had to deal with in my past and when I get into bed my head just switches on. I start thinking over past scenarios and even trying to put a happy ending to them, which never happened. I have seen two counsellors in the past and they worked short term. Thank you.

Delila Fri 27-Sep-19 11:32:34

Lyndiloo, I so agree with advice you give in your first post on this thread. It's a method that has worked a miracle for me after extreme sleep difficulties for more than two years caused by peripheral neuropathy and restless legs. Not only could I not sleep, but most nights would find me walking around and doing exercises. Something changed psychologically for me about six weeks ago, very much along the lines of your suggestions, and I've slept well ever since.
Start your mental preparations well in advance of bedtime, Whywhywhy, by telling yourself how sleepy you are and how hard you're finding it to stay awake, stay with that way of thinking until you go to bed and then tell yourself how perfectly cosy and comfortable you are. Keep doing it - it will become a new habit. Good luck.

Lewie Fri 27-Sep-19 09:30:07

Nytol works for me too, but I always spray my pillow with organic lavender Sleep Therapy Pillow Spray. If all else fails, I visualise playing golf - hole by hole - it never fails.

craftyone Thu 26-Sep-19 19:05:47

cut right down on sugars and eat your last meal early and I mean by 5. It could be that you have silent gerd, which would wake you and/or stop you getting to sleep.

If I wake at 3, I do the loo break, put another pillow on top, nibble a small oatcake and lie back on the slope. That normally works as does talking radio, very low so I have to concentrate to hear what is said. It stops my whizzy mind and always sends me off to sleep. LBC is ok because it does not have music.

For getting off to sleep, say alexa sleep sounds, ocean works for me, I tell her to turn off in 20 minutes and never hear most waves

Merry16 Thu 26-Sep-19 19:05:28

Listen to someone speaking on the radio. The BBC World Service will send you to sleep. Try it!

Joplin Thu 26-Sep-19 18:49:22

Gave up a long time ago - having spent a lifetime of unfortunate events which meant it was better/safer to stay awake, I never go to bed until 4 - 4.30 am. But I still find it hard to sleep. Counting composers, going through the alphabet, eventually helps.

Grandmama Thu 26-Sep-19 18:45:56

Usually I go straight to sleep but for years I've woken up after three or four hours and then doze until it's time to get up. But after the alarm goes off I sometimes go back to sleep for half an hour. Maybe I feel that the pressure is off once it's time to get up. I sometimes doze during the late morning or afternoon for half an hour or so but not always.

McGilchrist41 Thu 26-Sep-19 18:24:36

So many older people have trouble sleeping. I and many of my friends are the same. Lots of different advice but nothing seems to work.

LondonGranny Thu 26-Sep-19 17:26:37

A friend of mine got referred to a sleep of the big London teaching hospitals...Barts or Guys, I think. They had to spend a night there, head wired up with electrodes to measure brain activity or something and are on medication (dunno what exactly, but not sleeping pills) which had to be monitered and tweaked. Anyway after a lifetime of debilitating insomnia they're sleeping reasonably well. Find out if there's somewhere near you and get your GP to refer you.

Hetty58 Thu 26-Sep-19 17:22:14

I walk for an hour every day and sleep like a log. If I miss my two walks (even one of them) I have trouble staying asleep for long enough.

bikergran Thu 26-Sep-19 16:52:52

No help getting to sleep but! has anyone tried the App where you record your nights sleep on your phone.

Quite interesting (especially for those that "talk" in their sleep)

Bit long winded listening back to it but you can pick out the highs n lows without listening to the whole shebang.

Mazamet07 Thu 26-Sep-19 14:56:23

Rub Lush 'Sleepy' into the soles of your feet, then do a gentle ten minutes or so of bedtime yoga, (Youtube search to find one you like) - works every time for me.

Shortlegs Thu 26-Sep-19 14:07:47

So, at 02:25 you are on your computer (despite what you said earlier in the post) stimulating your brain and wondering why you can't sleep?


Joelise Thu 26-Sep-19 13:34:46

Try melatonin to reset your sleep pattern . Also helpful, is to eat a large ripe kiwi fruit one hour before bed , it’s rich in seratonin (spelling ? ) which also helps sleep . Magnesium is also something you could try . Do hope that this helps . My friend, who has terrible problems with sleep listens to talking books on her iPod when she can’t sleep .

crazyH Thu 26-Sep-19 13:27:00

They also say, never go to bed on an empty stomach......suits me, but only makes me fatter😂

crazyH Thu 26-Sep-19 13:25:32

I think, (this is just my take), sensitive people are less likely to fall asleep easily, because they take all the worries of the world (family mainly) on their shoulders. They over think. My friend, nice enough though she is, never worries about anything. Her children's problems are not hers, she says. I have shared holiday rooms with her , and as soon as lights are off, I can hear her snoring. I really envy her.

Saggi Thu 26-Sep-19 13:13:32

...also , my doc advised I try sleeping pills after I retired as he thought the insomnia was linked to my having to get up so early...I tried them , first one per night...then 2 per night. Not so much as made me drowsy .

Saggi Thu 26-Sep-19 13:10:12

You need to give in to insomnia..... I’ve not had more than 4 hours sleep a night in the past 23 years. I was working up till the last four years as well..... and had to get up at 5 am. My husband is s night owl and watches tv till 1 am.... he used to wake me up coming ticked, abdctgat was th start if it all. I threw him out of the bedroom and things improved for a while but I’m now back to 4 hours at most! And that four hours isn’t consistent. I hour asleep ...45 mins awake...half hour asleep....hour awake! In the end nothing would improve my situation so I just gave in to sleeplessness. Now I’m fine I’m no more tired than anybody else my age that I know... I swim, cycle, walk ...I don’t drive anywhere! I go to my room about 8 pm , watch what I like on my own tv... read or write ...then about 10 I try to settle . Then the hour on and half hour off arrives and I keep that up till about 5.15 when I am awake for going back. Stop fighting it and just give in to it...not half as bad as you imagine...

HannahLoisLuke Thu 26-Sep-19 12:24:39

All the sleep experts say don't use computers, phones etc for at least two hours before bed as the blue light disrupts your circadian rythums and yet you ladies are staring at the screen in the small hours.

I'm not a great sleeper either but I don't go near a screen.
I'd love a recording of seaside sounds but that would mean having something glowing in the room so I need to research the best way of doing it.

Yvon Thu 26-Sep-19 12:06:21

I put on an audio book quietly beside my pillow and set it to turn off after 45 mins. Rarely hear more than 15 mins.
Our library lends them for free. The annoying bit is having to rewind to the point when you fell asleep!

Diggingdoris Thu 26-Sep-19 11:53:11

I've realised that certain foods and drinks keep me awake. I dare not have cheese at evening meal or anything with even a trace of chocolate after 4pm. Also a cup of tea after 7pm will have me still awake at 3am. Any type of cola is a no no as well.
So chamomile tea helps me go off, though it tends to give me a dry mouth, but it's worth it.