No Christmas anymore for Selfish Adult Sons ?

Sadly due to your amazingly good and kind nature you have created your own two monsters in my opinion. You treating them like you are there to serve and cater to them has instilled in them the belief that you have no needs of your own. It does not give anyone the right to exploit good natured people but sadly in my experience mothers who bring up their children without telling said children that you are not there solely for there requirements end up with adult children who go on treating their mothers as yours are treating you. I know your good nature will prevent you from blowing a gasket as I would but try and think of yourself and your health and needs. They want as my mother would say ‘a hard clip round the ear’. And they do!

The only unreasonable aspect is that you haven't said this to your sons years ago!

Dear lady, you have enough on your plate!

Stick to your guns about next Christmas. If your sons attempt to change your mind, tell them that they can come if the buy and cook all the food, wash up, wash their used bed-linen before they leave and leave their various electronic devices at home, as you want to talk to them while they are visiting,

and also ask if they could not use the main TV for their games all the time.

No, don't ask, them, tell them that you will watch your TV in your living room, if they don't like it tough, next year they can make alternative arrangements.

I guess your sons are well meaning but ignorant.

Tell them, especially son number one you love him and exactly what help you require . Do you require time off from daughter care for a summer holiday?

Next Xmas you can still welcome sons , tell the adolescent men you love them, and provide Indian takeaways or frozen fish and chips.

Some people just behave very badly at Christmas - they seem to find it an excuse to do so.

I just heard today that my DMiL used to hate when our DC never helped with clearing tables or washing up when she hosted Christmas day, years ago!
I was thanking her for all those years when she slaved to give us a wonderful time. I had no idea that she resented it.
Anyway it was my turn today and still the DC don't leap into action.

Having bought up 3 males, my one bit of advice to you is to be very clear about what you want them to do. Some (most) men seem to be unable to take the initiative, read the signs or empathise until the facts are pointed out to them.
Give it to them straight and kindly. It's not unreasonable to point out that you and your husband are not in the best of health, are getting on a bit, and are exhausted from caring for your daughter, and what would be great is if they took over Christmas, the shopping, cooking and clearing up over the 3 days they come, to give you and their dear old Pa a break... I'd be tempted to point out wryly that the time comes when the child has to look after the parent that looked after them. That time is now.
They may just not be aware of how selfish they are being, and do what all offspring do when they go home, revert back to children.
Good luck!