Still not met three week old grandson.

I still don’t think the “hour cuddle” should be taken literally . Much as you would say “I’ll pop in for an hour” doesn’t mean you will be there exactly 60 minutes does it ? Such a shame that the OP hasn’t even been offered a peep of her grandchild .

She’s had videos and photos.
So she has had a “peep”.

Just unfortunately not in the way she hoped.

Hopefully she’s met him in person now.

I meant a real life peep not bloomin’ video Summerlove Although you probably knew that anyway .

I think this thread is a prime example of " I used to get along with my ILs (if applies to this case) till had a baby"

Exactly, Billybob

It is a dangerous road we are in. A peep without touching the baby? Holding the baby? Kissing baby? Bottlefeeding? Changing diaper? Taking pics?

What is what grandma wants to do vs what parents want?

What frequency and length of visits would she expect in the future?

A slippery slope for sure that starts with the first visit to meet baby

I fear we shall never know how this story ended. Perhaps time to stop all the speculation and move on?

Oh crikey yes Hithere a “slippery slope” indeed . I mean who knows what that first little visit/peep/cuddle could lead to ? An abduction perhaps ?

Or perhaps the reality is that the mother of the baby does not want the fathers family involved in their child’s life at all .

I think some of this thread is terribly sad and some of the comments are almost unbelievable .

Oh, the slippery slope! Beware of that! I went down the slippery slope with one of my grandchildren and it led to me eating the baby, it was so delicious! Its parents weren’t best pleased but it was their own fault for not putting boundaries in place.

Exactly SueDonim one can never be too careful.

madgran it’s just a few above, on this page

Oh yes ...I did miss it!

Oh dear. Every time I see that there's been a new post on this thread, I come on hoping it's from the OP and she's seen her GC.

I do hope this happens soon Happygran and you'll let us know.

You are really milking this thread for all it’s worth, aren’t you Hithere?

Let’s imagine the worst possible scenarios and then insinuate that poor Happygran is guilty of them. Charming

Madgran77, I hold my hands up high, it was I who made the reference to the 'major issue', but only because it had been mentioned previously by someone suggesting that maybe the new mother may have some problems that the paternal grandparents were unaware of. I, too, agree that medical issues are a private matter, and no one wants to broadcast them to the world. But let's get real here, we're talking about parents, and within most normal families, if there are any serious problems, we tend to tell those close to us, who love and care about us. I guess there are many people here who don't have that kind of relationship with their parents or in-laws ... how sad.

Anyway, I think we may have gone off on a tangent here, because none of us know what the reasons are why the OP has not been allowed to meet her grandchild.

Nansnet Yes, in many families it would be shared, I agree. Equally if someone chooses not to fine. Either way it's not a reason to not allow a GP to see their new grandchild is it, and I know we both agree on that

I hold my hands up high, it was I who made the reference to the 'major issue', but only because it had been mentioned previously by someone suggesting that maybe the new mother may have some problems that the paternal grandparents were unaware of. I, too, agree that medical issues are a private matter, and no one wants to broadcast them to the world. But let's get real here, we're talking about parents, and within most normal families, if there are any serious problems, we tend to tell those close to us, who love and care about us. I guess there are many people here who don't have that kind of relationship with their parents or in-laws ... how sad.

Not to be funny or crude Nansnet, but this DIL could of literally tore from Vagina to arsehole and back up again.
She could have severe 4th degree tear for all we know and 'feeding problems' might of been the easiest way to explain not to mention she might be able to keep some dignity.

gillybob here is one of my reference Yes I’ve spent a fortune on Moonpig already lol and bought the pram, not even a thank you except from my son.

Why is it not enough that her son thanks her?

Then this I think by now it would be fine to allow us to spend half an hour with the baby. He is actually bottle fed now and mum expresses as much as she can as well.

Things changed? OP thinks she could do with a half hour, I hope soon.

March could have severe 4th degree tear for all we know and 'feeding problems' might of been the easiest way to explain not to mention she might be able to keep some dignity.

This is a reasonable assumption, we just don't know, nor does OP.

March crude and uncalled for. And total conjecture.

That's the point.

It happens, it's an actual injury that most women have when giving birth.
She could very well have that.
I cringed typing it out, imagine saying it out loud to your Mum about your Wife.

Equally she could have a high level of anxiety about everything right now.

She could be seeing her dr about it or not, and she could be unwilling to share that information.

Or perhaps she’s just trying to cut MIL out. We just don’t know.

It’s unkind to just assume the worst of her though. So many expect DIL to be generous to OP. Where is the grace for her?

March I'm a retired midwife. I'm perfectly aware of what a 4th degree tear is, and I can tell you that it is very rare and is NOT an injury "that most women have when giving birth" Neither is it a reasonable assumption.

I'm sorry but I just don't get it. Whether the mother is ill/tired/doesn't like her in laws, or is just point scoring, it shouldn't mean that one set of grandparents get to see the new baby and not the other. The baby has two parents; if the mother is indisposed or just doesn't want to see her in laws, then the father should sort a visit out. It is the most natural thing in the world to want to be introduced to a new grandchild, as the OP's daughter in law will find out for herself when she becomes a grandparent!

I can’t believe this is still going! It must be four weeks by now. Hopefully, the OP has seen him by now.

It happens, it's an actual injury that most women have when giving birth.

What nonsense. Most women do not have such horrendous injuries after giving birth. Some of the posts on this thread are unbelievable and very nasty.

Separating a mother from her newborn is what’s cruel. Especially to meet the whims of extended family.