Am I selfish, a bad neighbour or just plain spiteful?

Queing is part of life just now and we're all having to do it. I'm shopping and so are lots of other people to keep the online slots free for those who can't go out. You've got rather cheeky neighbours to expect you to add their shopping to yours.

Oldwoman70 you are my role model from this moment on.

I would have said no too. They are taking advantage of your kind nature.

Not a bad neighbour at all you did the right thing. Too many people in their own bubble and like you I would help anyone but it is rarely reciprocated

Not a bad neighbour at all. You did the right thing. If anyone’s a bad neighbour it’s them. You did the right thing.

Do you have a twenty five seater sofa? I'm with you - what a thoughtless bunch! As they can't be bothered to go and get what they need they have decided you can sort it out for them. I don't think so!!

You are quite right. If they asked again you could just say "Sorry I really don't feel very comfortable with that idea".

I think you’re quite right. I have an online shop and am only allowed 80 items anyway - I’m currently adding items for elderly neighbours and it soon adds up so you probably wouldn’t have the capacity to do this anyway. I sometimes find myself taking some of my items off so they can get theirs. I don’t mind this though as I offered to help and I can always go out myself and top up.

I’m with you oldwoman70, what a cheek. Some people are selfish and only see their own point of view.

Made me laugh

Typical passive agressive strategy on the part of the neighbour. I will agress you by asking something totally unreasonable, then moan and criticize when you don't comply, making you feel guilty. Very cheeky of her and I am VERY glad you said no.

I have always been the same,do anything for anyone but when I need help it’s never there.
I am in the shielding group because of health reasons but never been able to get a slot with one of the supermarkets for delivery or click and collect but thankfully have done with Iceland. They do so much more than just frozen food and been so grateful for them putting extra slots in at 11am each day.
Definitely don’t think you have done anything wrong though

Yeah, no. You don't need to feel guilty. I wouldn't add anybody's shopping to mine unless it was a close friend or relative. Too many opportunities for miscommunication and it's too tedious and too much money changing hands. Forget those people. How can they accuse you of being a bad neighbour? THEY are presumptuous by even asking.

Your a good neighbour hope you have a mega sofa to hide behind and to keep the blinds down to stop her peering in

I really admire your courage to stand up for yourself!!! Bravo!!! It’s never too late to stop being a doormat. Pffff!!!!

I would have done exactly the same, Dont feel guilty.
I once took a parcel in for a neighbour and despite R.M. leaving a card to say we had it they left it here for over a week. I ended up taking it round myself. I dont take parcels in any more.

I think you are a brilliant neighbour and I would take no notice of them.

Well done ! I would have wanted to say no, but wouldn't have had the courage. I find it hard to be so assertive, so would have done it.
And then not answered the door next time.

Hope it’s a big sofa - I will be joining you too ! You are quite right.

I wonder if they would have paid you for the groceries. Don't feel.guilty. It's not your problem.

I'll help almost anyone and rarely ask for help myself. For now I can do my bit and if it helps society so much the better. Most people are nice we should forgive them if they are not perfect.

I do not forgive litter dropping, lawlessness, ante-social behaviour or politicians who promote policies that harm more people than they help.

I have a delivery coming tomorrow and I would never ask to add my shopping to theirs after the juggle I have to do to keep within my 85 items!

They are being very thoughtless!

I did this for a friend during the first couple of weeks of lockdown - I’m on Sainsburys vulnerable list and was able to get a weekly delivery at a time when slots were difficult to book. Only did it once and have refused ever since, because there were quite a few unexpected substitutions and omissions due to panic buying at that time. It caused a difficult situation, as obviously my friend could not be present to say yes or no at the delivery point. I know online grocery availability has improved since then, but I’d still say don’t do it unless it’s just a few items and you agree substitutions beforehand.

Thank you for all the supportive comments. Like most people I try to be helpful and as I have said always been a people pleaser.

I am not normally that brave but I was having a bad day and had been thinking how no neighbour had offered help or even asked how I was coping.

I have no doubt they have forgotten the incident - I was the one thinking about it - and they will have no problem asking next time they need a favour!

Come out from behind the sofa, you did the right thing, in my mind you were being used.We arent locked down here but restrictions for the over 70,s our neighbours are sixty seven and sixty five, not once have they asked if we need anything, in fact when we do the odd shopping when the shops are quiet, we have asked them, one day I couldnt resist saying "this is the other way round, we oldies shopping for you youngsters" they havent taken the hint maybe it was too subtle!