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Awkward

(48 Posts)
Shinamae Mon 20-Jul-20 11:14:31

The postman has just delivered me a parcel and asked if he could use my toilet, I did hesitate but in the end I said I’m sorry no you can’t.....?

Oopsadaisy3 Mon 20-Jul-20 11:38:38

Oh dear, that’s awkward isn’t it ?
But I think I might have done the same, if it was my usual postie I might have let him use the loo that visitors are using, but only because I would have been taken by surprise.

TBH I’m surprised he asked you.

GagaJo Mon 20-Jul-20 11:43:24

Poor bloke. He was probably desperate for a poo. I hope for his sake you live in a remote countryside area so he could go behind a bush.

I don't really blame you for not wanting to, but I can imagine being in his position.

Namsnanny Mon 20-Jul-20 11:47:46

Yes he must ha e been desperate to even contemplate asking! blush
It was a difficult position you were in though.

annep1 Mon 20-Jul-20 11:54:08

What an awful predicament. I feel sorry for both of you.

Luckygirl Mon 20-Jul-20 12:02:37

Difficult - as someone with IBS I have blagged use of a toilet from all and sundry in the past. But slightly more problematical in the current circumstances. Poor chap!

Nortsat Mon 20-Jul-20 12:12:27

Oh dear.
I imagine you would want to say yes, but really you can’t.

I am shielding and would definitely need to say no.
But even in normal circumstances it’s not really a very good idea.
I think my partner would say yes, if I weren’t shielding. But in current circumstances it’s definitely no.

EllanVannin Mon 20-Jul-20 12:12:35

Indeed it was awkward. I can't honestly say what I'd have done.
Most likely I'd have quickly pointed out to where a man lived on his own.

Charleygirl5 Mon 20-Jul-20 12:14:46

He must have been desperate to ask- I would have said yes and cleaned everywhere afterwards.

B9exchange Mon 20-Jul-20 12:20:18

I would never turn down an urgent request like that, just wipe everything down well afterwards. I have been in a similar situation and as others have said, he must have been utterly desperate to have asked you.

Put yourself in his position, and think how you would feel? Sometimes we have to care for others at least as much as ourselves, and the risk really is minimal if you don't get close and clean after him. We have wipes, sanitiser, paper towels and bin ready in our loo and would never turn anyone away.

Oldwoman70 Mon 20-Jul-20 12:25:52

I have a cloakroom just a few steps from the front door so I would have said yes and then cleaned everything thoroughly but can understand those who would have refused.

annep1 Mon 20-Jul-20 12:33:33

Reading B9Exchanges response I think on balance I would have said yes too. But I do understand those who would say no.

GillT57 Mon 20-Jul-20 12:34:00

I would have said yes and then thoroughly cleaned the loo after he had gone. Poor bloke, how embarassing for him to have to ask. And, remember, it is not only you, the householder who is at risk, it is also the postie who is going into another household and is desperate enough to risk it

Shinamae Mon 20-Jul-20 12:48:05

If I had two toilets I would’ve said yes but only having one I could not take the risk...

Nonogran Mon 20-Jul-20 13:00:07

I agree with B9exchanges too. Poor chap. I hope he found another neighbour who was able to help.

PinkCakes Mon 20-Jul-20 13:04:31

Poor man. I would have let him use it then cleaned everywhere thoroughly.

Esspee Mon 20-Jul-20 13:21:49

I would never allow anyone who provided a service to me to have to worry about asking me to use my toilet. I cannot understand anyone being so precious that they wouldn’t provide basic amenities. How difficult is it to give your lavatory a quick clean afterwards?
Clearly he must have been in extreme distress to ask you.

Xander Mon 20-Jul-20 13:27:48

I would have said yes and just wiped down handles taps and surfaces afterwards. As others have said he must have been desperate.

merlotgran Mon 20-Jul-20 13:27:48

It's not being precious, Esspee, It's being careful. A postman comes into contact with a lot of people/surfaces etc.

In Shinamae's position I would have also regretfully said No.

GagaJo Mon 20-Jul-20 13:32:15

What was he supposed to do then, merlotgran? There is another thread on the site complaining about campers defecating in public.

SueDonim Mon 20-Jul-20 13:37:51

If my postie asked to use the loo I wouldn’t hesitate to say yes. He’s been our postie for 20+ years and I’d know he’d have to be desperate to ask.

I’m sure we all possess plenty of anti-Covid cleansing materials nowadays so what I’d do first is open the loo window, then once he’d gone, I would stay out of the area for an hour, so any droplets would have settled, then mask up and using gloves, give everything a good clean.

merlotgran Mon 20-Jul-20 13:48:07

I said, 'If I was in Shinamae's position, Gagajo

I'm not.

We have an outside toilet so I would be happy to let the postman use it. I would not be happy with anyone coming into the house.

Nobody should be made to feel bad for saying No. These are difficult times for us all.

merlotgran Mon 20-Jul-20 13:49:35

I have Flash with Bleach spray, Dettox and wipes in our outside loo. Anyone using it is expected to clean up after themselves.

annodomini Mon 20-Jul-20 14:17:55

I haven't even asked to use friends' loos when we've had a brew in their gardens and have arrived home in the dire condition, known as 'key in the lock' syndrome. My only loo is upstairs which is my greatest regret about buying an older house.

Shinamae Mon 20-Jul-20 15:27:49

Thank you for your support merlotgran.....