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Mum taken into hospital

(118 Posts)
Katyj Sat 03-Oct-20 17:22:00

This morning mum had a fall, ambulance came and checked her over, her bp was very high and has been for a week So they’ve taken her in. The dr rang and said three hours later she was ready for home ! Couldn’t believe my ears, I have refused to care for her as she suggested I should. The dr relented, said she’d keep her in and put the phone down. AIBU

craftyone Sat 03-Oct-20 17:25:31

once upon a time she cared for you

PinkCakes Sat 03-Oct-20 17:28:09

Other than the fall and hypertension, is she usually well? Has her blood pressure medication been changed/increased now?

If she's otherwise in decent health, she shouldn't really be taking up a hospital bed.

GagaJo Sat 03-Oct-20 17:28:24

No, not if she really needs either hospital care or nursing.

It sounds as if they're nervous because of Covid. And obviously, your mum hasn't got any real idea of how much work is involved in caring for an elderly patient.

Katyj Sat 03-Oct-20 17:31:23

Very true. I do a lot for my mum as well as work part time, and care for grandchildren. But the fact is they haven’t increased her medication so she still has a high bp as the paramedic said she is at a very high risk of having a stroke or heart attack she’s 89.
I can’t get her different medication today as I would have to ring 111 where upon they would send an ambulance again with such high readings .

Smileless2012 Sat 03-Oct-20 17:32:10

If you're concerned about your mum falling again and/or you being unable to give her the care you need then no, you are not being unreasonable.

Several years ago my mum, who lived with my brother, fell on the stairs and broke her collar bone. SS were supposed to be installing some features to create a safer environment and the hospital wanted to discharge mum before those had been put in place.

I refused to have her sent some so she went to a nursing home for recuperation and to give time for SS's to do what was needed.

She was in for 3 weeks; 2 weeks after SS's had been because after just one week there, she wasn't fit enough to go home. There we was no way the hospital should have tried to discharge her, and send her home when they wanted too.

Oopsminty Sat 03-Oct-20 17:32:23

I'd not be wanting any loved one of mine in hospital at the moment unless they really needed to be there.

Hospitals are hotbeds for infection and with Covid around I'm sure the doctor was doing the best for your mother.

welbeck Sat 03-Oct-20 17:33:03

were you caring for her before she fell.
what are her needs.
why don't you want to do it.

Katyj Sat 03-Oct-20 17:33:38

Pink she has angina, atrial fibrillation and poor mobility.

Judy54 Sat 03-Oct-20 17:34:30

Hello Katyj there are a number of factors here: What age is your Mum, how is she normally cared for, does she live with you or alone, what care is required. Find out from the hospital what her diagnosis is, what treatment if any she needs and why they feel that she is ready to be discharged and what this will mean for you. I do hope that everything works out for both you and your Mum.

Katyj Sat 03-Oct-20 17:38:13

Normally she doesn’t need 24 hour care she has a carer once a day it’s just been these last two weeks she has fallen 4 times because of dizzy spells. One dr and two nurses have been to see her in that time and agreed her bp is dangerously high but have failed to call either her or me I finally have a phone consultation on Monday.

Katyj Sat 03-Oct-20 17:40:32

Thank you Judy I will be asking those question tomorrow when their likely to try to send her home again without treatment.

Oopsadaisy4 Sat 03-Oct-20 17:45:02

It seems that you will either have to arrange carers to call in more frequently during the day or speak to your Mum about going into a home.
It doesn’t sound as though she is safe to be on her own any more and something will have to be done, sooner rather than later.
I would imagine that the poor thing must be very stressed and anxious about her future.

biba70 Sat 03-Oct-20 17:45:17

Impossible to respond without knowing full facts- does she live with you? Do you normally care for her? Do you work?

Certainly would NOT wish any relative of mine to stay one second more than necessary in hospital at the moment.

Daughter was in an orthppeadic ward after an operation recently. She was the only 'young one' (47) there- and all the other ladies had had their hip pinned after a fall, and all had Alzheimers. She was so upset about it and said she finally understood what I meant about future plans, in case ...

Katyj Sat 03-Oct-20 17:50:32

Biba, yes I work, she lives on her own with a carer once a day. She’s normally quite well, just recently began falling and dizzy spells. In the short term I’m going to ask the carers to visit more often, hopefully get her medication adjusted and try and keep her independent a while longer.

welbeck Sat 03-Oct-20 18:05:35

maybe the hosp feel it is for the GP to deal with her ongoing medication.
has she seen a cardiologist while in the hosp.
what do they propose re high BP.

welbeck Sat 03-Oct-20 18:07:04

people's care needs change. maybe she needs to have people around her, for safety, at least until BP is under control.
that number of falls is concerning.

anna7 Sat 03-Oct-20 18:07:43

My mil has fallen several times and the hospital have sent her home after a few hours once they have checked her over and are satisfied she hasn't any serious injury. I wouldn't expect them to keep her in for no good reason.

grannyqueenie Sat 03-Oct-20 18:09:25

You’re wise, Katyj to want to know there's a plan in place to control her high blood pressure before she is discharged. She’d probably end up being in hospital much longer if she had a serious stroke or heart attack, as well as the long term implications of both of those for her and you. Hope you get some satisfactory reassurance from the medics soon.

Katyj Sat 03-Oct-20 18:10:13

Welbeck hi yes they said the medication is the gps responsibility which is fine ,only it will be Wednesday next week by the time I could get some for her, then it needs to take worried about her having a fall or a heart attack or stroke before then.

Hithere Sat 03-Oct-20 18:19:49

You are in your right to refuse to care for her

Looks like she needs more care than she thinks she needs - that is a battle that is very taxing on you, as it is showing right now.

BlueBelle Sat 03-Oct-20 18:31:39

Of course you’re in your right to refuse to have her home but do you want her staying in hospital at this time
I realise you do a lot for her and can’t have her with you and she’s normally ok at home but could you have her for a few days until she gets the needed meds and to see her over this blip

Katyj Sat 03-Oct-20 18:50:48

Bluebelle no I wish she wasn’t in there but it feels like the devil and the deep blue sea. She has mobility problems, broke her hip last year so wouldn’t be able to stay with us.

MrsRochester Sat 03-Oct-20 19:56:11


once upon a time she cared for you“

That’s a bit harsh. Not everyone has the ability to be a cater, for all sorts of genuine reasons.

MrsRochester Sat 03-Oct-20 19:56:46

Carer. Predictive text!