Mums feeding their babies but not holding the baby in their arms !

My Mum told me that I was fed from a bottle propped up in the pram. She had three others under five so I suppose I should be grateful for whatever nourishment I could get!

Hetty58 yawn. Old statistics. Fed is best, ask any children’s medical
Professional.

People like you spouting poison and judgement are the last thing any child needs anything from.

Oh for goodness sake Hetty! There are many reasons why a baby cannot be breastfed:
Baby unable to latch on
Some women have insufficient glandular tissue to enable them to breast feed - it's physically impossible for them, no matter how much they may want to.
Some women just don't lactate, no matter how much they want to or what medical intervention is tried
Some babies just don't thrive on breast milk alone and formula milk is necessary to keep the child alive.

Of course "breast is best", but bottle feeding is better than no feed at all. --you should know this---already

Hetty58

Babyshark, Oh but they do! Bottle fed babies have poorer health and shorter lives than breast fed ones - fact!

Than which breast fed ones? Is a bottle fed baby who is loved, wanted, fed regularly and carefully likely to have better health and a longer life than one who is an accidental conception that her mother can't afford, or is unloved, or is neglected, or abused, or just very sick, but breast fed.

I think you need a fact check, really.

It's really amusing when, having pointed out that something is less than ideal, people reply with 'worst case scenarios' of starvation and neglect.

The vast majority of women can breast feed. Here in the UK, so many choose not to, for reasons of convenience. It's very sad.

What’s really sad is the number of new mums who avoid going out, don’t access services and delay asking for help because Of fear of judgement.

Iv never lost sleep over a baby being bottle fed for any reason by a mum that loves them. Iv lost a fair few nights sleep for some children and I wish to god it was over something as ridiculous as how they were fed as babies.

If women choose not to breast feed that is their choice, and this should not be used as a stick to beat them. Women should not carry any guilt if they choose not to.

Women need support, not criticism and I like what Babyshark said “fed is best”.

You're views are not amusing Hetty. They're outdated, old fashioned and, if voiced in the wrong company, i,e. amongst your nursing mothers; potentially upsetting and guilt laden.

Greeneyedgirl, it's not that simple.

Most women really do want to breast feed, but, for various cultural reasons, their 'choice' is soon influenced.

There's a severe lack of support in workplaces, in public and even in families. The result is that we have the lowest rate of feeding in the entire world by the time a child is one year old.

Mothers feel very guilty about bottle feeding. They feel that they've 'failed' - which explains the strong reactions in comments here.

Nevertheless, bottle feeding contributes to childhood obesity and cancer statistics. It's a public health crisis.

My baby grandchildren, twins, were bottle fed. They were bottle fed with their own mother’s breast milk. It was too difficult for my daughter to breast feed two at the same time and keep them to the same routine, so for several months we helped out, up there at every feed time unless her husband was at home. When her third child was born, she fed him herself, breast fed him that is. I was so happy for her that she had that lovely experience of feeding her own baby.
Maybe some people watched us when we were out and about and she and I were feeding the babies with bottles, maybe they thought that the poor babies were being fed formula (not that it would have harmed them) but the truth was that they were drinking their own mother’s milk, just in a more convenient way, since there were two of them.

Hetty58 - that is a statement that could cause worry and distress to women who for whatever reason have not breastfed their children; can you provide a reference for your assertion that bottle fed babies have shorter lives?

Mothers feel very guilty about bottle feeding. They feel that they've 'failed'

And is it any wonder when people like you, Hetty are piling the guilt on them and referring to their babies as a poor baby being bottle fed.

I thought this was a site for older people, not people with small children. Personally I'm past thinking about much babies and how to treat them and more into things that affect those in later life.

My babies were bottle fed for reasons I won't go into on here, but rest assured I was not coerced in any way.

I was disappointed, but pleased they were alive, but will never forget the first NCT party I was at after the birth of my first, when I overheard the class facilitator say that if her baby died of a cot death, at least she would know that it wasn't her fault, as she had breastfed him.

Admittedly my hormones were all over the place, but I was devastated. I loved my baby as much as any mother can, and the thought that if anything happened to her would be considered my fault for not being able to breastfeed was appalling to me. I never felt the same again about NCT, and have always defended women who bottle feed, as how they feed their babies is none of anyone else's business.

Incidentally, my babies survived the bottle feeding, and are happy and healthy adults. FACT.

LadyBella then scroll past this thread? You don’t have to read and comment on those that no longer interest you.

@Doodledog that is awful. I often think that people like that facilitator are wracked with insecurity and say those things because of a need for validation. But it’s comments like that that cause untold harm to mothers and them indirectly babies.

It helps to consider the original post if people stop seeing the issue as one full of personal attack.

Actually Hetty is factually correct :

qz.com/1744017/why-the-uk-has-one-of-the-lowest-breastfeeding-rates-in-the-world/

qz.com/1744017/why-the-uk-has-one-of-the-lowest-breastfeeding-rates-in-the-world/

Looking at the bigger question of low breast feeding rates in the UK brings up some interesting aspects such as women who have to return to work earlier than they'd prefer, lack of facilities, lack of support and lack of public health support. Especially in the early weeks, breast feeding gives children important protection via the mother's milk from common childhood illnesses and infections.

It's impressive to see how many young mothers breast feed in public now, good for them. The bigger issues I worry about are what seems an English obsession with breasts as primarily sexual objects and the awkwardness of the average English person with touch. These things are important in raising emotionally healthy children. I think the OP has touched a nerve but no one is blaming individuals, it's a bigger issue than that.

Yes you are being unreasonable, so many young mums out there doing their best who would benefit from a bit of support.... Judgement helps no one

Also it is possible to express milk into a bottle. Some breastfeeding women do that out and about so they don't have to face judgement for doing that in public too

I am shocked by Hetty’s comments.

Me too Lucca. As if young mums don't have enough to worry about in the early days of motherhood, without having grannies guilt tripping them for their perceived "failures and inadequacies".

@Luckyoldbeethoven. But when posters say they feel “sad” and “angry” at what amounts to mothers choices for their own babies it is a personal attack, because what they are in effect saying, is that these mothers are harming their babies. They don’t use those words but the emotions they say they feel very much imply it.

It doesn't get much more personal, really.

Hetty58

Babyshark, Oh but they do! Bottle fed babies have poorer health and shorter lives than breast fed ones - fact!

No. Just no.

Lucca

I am shocked by Hetty’s comments.

You and me both

I breastfeed my babies through choice but I am one of four siblings all bottle fed we are all pretty healthy and in our seventies !