wanting to spend Christmas on my own

Mapleleaf

Daisychain do what you want to do and not what others think you should do, especially during this Covid crisis. ?

Do your family rely on you for cooking, washup or childminding duties when you visit? If so, maybe that's why they are being so insistent which is rather selfish of them to be honest!

Daisychain do what you want to do and not what others think you should do, especially during this Covid crisis. ?

I put my thought down a few years ago re Christmas on my own. I planned my whole day. It was wonderful. Far better than being out on the road and not being able to have a glass of wine with my meal. I did it last year as well. Do as you want and not what they want. Hope you have a lovely day.

My daughter's friend had Covid and lost her unborn baby. At the hospital, she was told it's happened to six other expectant mums there. It's so upsetting.
Those poor babies and their families. Heartbreaking.

Daiseychain, just. say. no.
if you can't do what you like at your time of life, when can you.
i bet you spent their early years always putting them first. well it's your turn now. so put yourself first.
do what you want. because you want to. no further explanation needed. don't try to persuade or get their agreement. you can disagree without being disagreeable, if you see what i mean. hold fast.
many of us will be on here xmas day; we can all wave to each other, in splendid isolation.

Daisychain, I like company too, but it's just one Christmas out of my life, so I'd rather make plans for summer meetups.

My daughter's friend had Covid and lost her unborn baby. At the hospital, she was told it's happened to six other expectant mums there. It's so upsetting.

Of course, pregnant and breastfeeding mums can't have the vaccine. We all have a responsibility to avoid spreading this virus.

thank you all.
I am hoping that the weather will do it for me, as I have to cross over on a ferry, and winds over 55 the ferry doesn't normally sale. I like company and people around me,
OH the luxury of doing what you want when you want.

I hope to spend it alone. We have been told that the 3 households can be a bubble but we would be 4 and one of my sons is mixing with his in laws which adds contact with 2 more households . Not only would that break the rules but it adds too many people who have been mixing all over the place!

cornishpatsy, I suggested (at first) a Christmas Eve visit, as a compromise - yet still, when I thought on, felt unhappy about that.

I've been very careful since February, so I don't want to ruin it now. I want to avoid the virus and survive!

Now, I've insisted that a family walk, in the fresh air, is the only way we'll be meeting up.

I've told my daughter that she's being unreasonable, and selfish, in expecting me to visit (and risk my life).

Daisychain, if you (and others) don't want to face the confrontations and arguments, you could arrange to 'feel rather unwell', perhaps with a tummy upset, on the day.

Daisychain, you have made a very sensible and valid choice (as have many of us). Stick to your guns and tell them that you'd feel very uncomfortable and vulnerable mixing at this time.

We're very much of the opinion that even though Christmas get-togethers might be allowed, they're not compulsory.

We're planning to see our two sons, our daughter, her partner and our granddaughter for a Christmas morning picnic brunch: bacon rolls, sausage baps, mince pies, mulled wine and coffee.
No going indoors and minimal mixing.
Our daughter is asthmatic and also pregnant so we feel more comfortable with this arrangement.

Daisychain I hope you can agree a plan that you're happy with.

I really feel for you Daisychain.
You should be able to spend Christmas as you wish. It amazes me just how many people do things because they feel that they ought to.
Do you feel this way because of the current climate regarding the virus, or would you have wanted to spend Christmas alone under normal circumstances?
I hope that you manage to sort this out.

It does annoy me when people think we all want to do the same as them and if we dont we are lying for some reason.

I would speak to them again, telling them you are looking forward to doing exactly what you want to do for once, explaining your menu and plans finishing with I will visit Christmas eve or boxing day instead.

Not unreasonable, but I expect your family find it hard to understand. I don't. My neighbour is planning to spend Christmas alone. I'm sure her family - who live a distance away - will phone her, as will we.

We're staying home alone, just the 2 of us, and our family - who also live several hours away - are doing the same.

We all feel that it's appropriate this year to avoid potentially trundling the virus around the country.

exactly I tried to explain, but was met with, I was being difficult. which didn't make me feel very good.
as it stands I am having to spend it with my youngest daughter.
she has a lovely family, but I did fantasied spending Christmas on my own.

No absolutely it’s perfectly reasonable in my book. I may have the same problem when my grown up GC find out my plans. I’m invited to my daughters and she understands my thoughts about it and left it up to me we just haven’t told any of the younger family members yet. All you can do is try and explain your reasoning and hope they understand.