Birthday flowers

I agree that it's unfortunate that all three sent flowers, especially now that there are so many different online gift choices that can be sent directly, already gift-wrapped - and I don't just mean through Amazon. I've received Moonpig and Funky Pigeon cards and gifts of various values - but none as expensive as an Interflora bouquet! And also a lovely gift of gourmet coffee beans! Flowers are just a bit unimaginative these days, I think

Good idea HomeAgain. You have thoughtful AC to remember you and I guess they have busy lives too. Like annodomini I love flowers even though I have hay fever. Most flowers I can have somewhere I can see them and even lilies look lovely in a pot in the garden. OH loves chocs so I get plenty of help. I do wonder about these ‘thoughtful’ gifts we say we buy others, do they really like them? I have to admit I have received some very thoughtful gifts based on my interests but some experiences were not used in time or some gifts are still gathering dust in the house. My fault I know, but ‘disposable’ gifts are better for me. I hope you enjoyed the rest of your birthday.

My younger son is very thoughtful and gave his father a sundial with a lovely inscription on his 70th and we also had a cushion with a family tree printed on it. His brother always curses that he has topped his presents everytime! We love both of them and their gifts equally of course!

I can see it from both sides. My older brother is excellent at buying thoughtful and appropriate gifts. He has a real knack for it. Every Birthday and Christmas he buys something linked to my interests and I always appreciate the effort that has gone into his choice. However, I know I am difficult to buy for. Said brother also used to buy me fudge when he went on holiday. I never wanted to hurt his feelings and appreciated that he had thought of me, but I can’t abide fudge. Eventually, I decided to tell him as diplomatically as possible that I didn’t actually like fudge.

Do your children know how you feel about flowers? A few people have suggested wish lists etc. As I know I am difficult to buy for I often give loved ones a list of ten things I would like so that they can choose something from my list and I still get a surprise -
Win Win! ?

Wow I'm lucky if I even get a text message! But I am the first person everyone thinks of if they have a problem, so I know I do have some value for them

I understand it might look as though they haven't given their presents much thought, but it's hard to know what's in other people's minds - even our nearest and dearest. If you've generally got a good relationship with your kids you maybe just need to put the gift buying to one side, have a wry chuckle about it, make a point of buying yourself something you really want, and/or find a tactful way to change things. We agreed a few years ago to focus on the grandkids at Christmas and, although we usually give the adult children with kids restaurant vouchers, ask them not to buy us anything. I ask the adult children and the grandchildren to put a list of things they'd like on Amazon for birthdays (and Christmas for GC). Items can be bought elsewhere and you can ( invisibly to them) remove the item from their Amazon gift list if you prefer to shop locally or find it cheaper elsewhere.
Maybe you could suggest everyone uses gift lists or you could indicate in advance of your birthday if you have a charity you'd like them to donate to instead of giving you a present. Whatever approach you choose, try not to let this one issue cause resentment or a fall out - there's too much to lose.

At least you still have them in your life, and they did remember you.
I do hear you, but honestly, it could be so much worse.
Please don't push them away with ingratitude. Some people don't put huge amounts of thoughts into gift buying, it's simply not their priority but it doesn't mean they don't love you. Remember there are different languages of love and gifts may not be high on their radar.
Unless they never use show you any love in any way, in which case it's really not about the gifts per se. I hope that's not the case.

They had to think of you to do anything at all. Everyone has much on their minds at present. Sounds like you’re feeling sorry for yourself at the moment as are many. I’m sure next year will be better x

Accept them in the spirit they were given, if you really don't want the chocolates, you can send them to me (we didn't get any with our shop this morning)
Can't understand you not liking cut flowers. They bring a lot of colour, and perfume into the home

Oh dear, it isn't just a click on a button. They had to choose which flowers to send and they are not cheap alternative. As we get older we have most things so they may be having problem deciding. If they haven't sent flowers before they obviously have thought about it and it is one present you can usually rely on to be delivered on the birthday. Try to be more positive about the presents. It's my birthday in 2 weeks and I must admit just a card would be lovely. Happy belated birthday.

Well at least you got something. I have 3 sons and not one of them bought my anything for Christmas.

Oh no chocolates and flowers oh how unfair life is.
I once sent flowers to an elderly relative she told me they were yellow and that is a sign of hatred. I never sent her another gift ever. Just tell your children how unwelcome their gifts are and hopefully next year they will remember.

At least you got something!
It is difficult at the moment to shop for anything other than essentials . If it is ordered online, there is no guarantee that it will even be delivered!
I would guess as well that AC , like I used to with my parents, find it increasingly hard to buy a gift that they think you will like or enjoy - there is only so many sets of toiletries, new jumpers/blouses/cardigans etc you can give anyone and gift cards and vouchers are increasingly difficult to even use with so many retail businesses going bust or bought out - but maybe that wouldn't have suited either!

I have 2 adult sons both with wives and children. I have told them since the children came along to save their money, a lovely card is all I look forward to for birthday and Christmas but they cant even manage that.
My MIL wouldn't have got anything if it wasn't for me as DH never bothered with it.
I have always longed for a Grandma birthday or Christmas card too but it never happens.
I did complain one year and one DIL told me my son never does birthdays .. I said the sons I raised always did in the past.
I also share a birthday with one of my grandchildren!
I've become used to the fact that I have served my purpose as a parent and dont matter anymore

I would love to receive flowers, my OH has never bought me flowers or birthday presents. Enjoy them a click of a button is worth more than no click.

My children are all grown and I have never had a card or gift for my birthday. I don’t think they even know when my birthday is. If I was to ask them, they give me the date of their dad’s birthday! ?

My mother hated being given toiletries, especially soap "Don't they think I'm clean?" but as she grew older it became more and more difficult to find anything that would light up her face except flowers!

You are so ungrateful

Have you considered that lockdown and the disruption to all our lives is pretty overwhelming? It's not all about you. I had a fabulous recent birthday but I realise lots of people haven't had the same experience. There's going to be lots of time in the future to spend time with our loved ones and have "normal" celebrations. It's my SIL's birthday on Saturday. I've ordered a special card and a gift voucher but we'll miss not all being together. But, we're all in the same boat.

I prefer plants to cut flowers but if anyone sent me flowers, I'd love the thought behind the present and enjoy them. Sent flowers are expensive. Just enjoy them and don't overthink.

My Ds keeps buying me bottles of expensive Champagne. It's hell! But I persevere in polishing it all off.

I’ve broken my foot so I’m housebound just now. My elderly parents just sent me beautiful flowers plus a box of chocolates. I thought my dad was going to die laughing when we sent him a photo of their lovely gift. It was the tiniest box of chocolates ever and only included 3 sweeties! Not even one for each of us.... I think you should thank your family but mention that you’re not keen on flowers. It’s hard to buy gifts during lockdown though!

I am going to be 80 on the 20th and if my children send me anything at all I will be very grateful. So many people never get anything at all. I hope my daughter will send me flowers or
chocolate and my son who enjoys cooking/baking might make me a cake...

Imagine how you would feel if they didn’t bother to acknowledge your birthday
As we get older we are more difficult to buy for as we have what we want
I’ve solved this problem by asking my daughter for a Bueaty salon voucher for all occasions so she doesn’t have the worry of thinking what to buy me and I love it

Happy Birthday Willow and Congratulations for your Golden Wedding tomorrow

My children live abroad so we don’t do presents but they will send a bottle of gin or wine every so often, money for a takeaway or scent. I send money for the grandchildren at random times. Can’t you ask each other what you want? Failing that, buy a voucher. I always love John Lewis or Amazon!