Time scale could be a week or 6 months+ how do l stay positive

Otherwise you have to go through it once, but worry about it a million times. SUCH WISE ADVICE. !!
And go on, treat yourself to some lovely Spring plant- you can ala
was enjoy them right nw in pots and take them with you when you go - as you say that could be age yet so don't live in limbo - just enjoy it as much as you can.

I am looking at downsizing knowing DHs health is limiting his life and we have discussed getting me settled before the inevitable. Bungalows are so expensive,no way can we buy. Anyone being offered one should snap it up no matter how long the wait. Spring, summer are on their way, look at what you haven't used overwinter and clear it out and if you are still waiting end if summer do the same again. Enjoy your garden while you can. If you know you will have some garden when you do move select plants you would like to take with you. On one move I did I filled 45 pots with plants I wanted to have in my new garden. It's actually exciting to think about. Fingers crossed for you.

I'm sorry I don't want to depress you, but 15 years ago I waited 3 years to move from a flat to a bungalow. If your waiting on the local authority you may have to wait a while more yet to be able to move. You need to have a lot of patience and cope as well as you can.

I downsized to a bungalow, just in it over a year now. I packed bits up every day when I sold my old townhouse, starting with crockery I wouldn't use, clothes, etc. Some stuff went to charity shops, friends, etc. It was a great help the nearer it got to moving day, I'd everything packed by then and my friends just had to help with furniture and all the boxes which I had coloured coded with pens to show which room they were for. Typical Virgo and control freak lol

SJV07, sadly its not that simple to get a stair lift- not with the council anyway! I asked in 2018, way before lockdowns& covid existed-after struggling 6 yrs with the stairs. a lady came to look a few months later, in summer 2019- i explained i was on a (very long) waiting list for double knee replacement op, but i could be waiting months yet,at least, and my knees, plus now all other joints, were getting worse, plus a heart valve problem which makes me tired& breathless, getting to top of my stairs each night is getting to be dreaded! (& im only 57!)Theres already the 'fittings' in where the previous tenants had stair lift in (why housing didn't just leave it is a mystery, as i was given house over 28 others, due to our disabilities)so i assumed occupational therapy lady would not see it a problem(it was inferred by council it was just a formality) but no! - said as hospitals these days like to get people moving more after joint replacements id 'better wait' as they will think it better to 'get up& down stairs'! 2 years later, after covid& pandemic hit the world, so NO OPERATIONS AT ALL, and NO chance of getting new knees, and NO chance of a stair lift still, here i am still struggling up/down the blooming hated stairs every day&night!.Also, NO bungalows on rehousing list that would be large enough (3bed) for me and my 2 disabled sons, still at home, to live in.As they assume everyone needing bungalows is an old person their own.I bet that it'd be ok with them if i wanted to pay for a stair lift myself though eh.Or had money to buy a 3bed bungalow.?

We have not long sold our house so the biggest piece of advice I can give is start early and get rid of anything you don't want or need. We thought we had done all this but it still turned out to be the most stressful (out of 16 house moves) that we have ever done.

Yes Janburry, start now with the items you don't need every day, pack a couple of boxes a day- mark them clearly, then if you're waiting longer & need stuff back out, you know where they are! As for garden, keep it tidy, buy only smaller potted plants, and maybe treat yourselves to a couple of new garden chairs (fold up ones if necessary) so you could use now or in new place.And try not to worry too much, at least you're nearer to one than many of us?

Take all these lovely messages as one giant hug from us all. It seems such a large task but one bag at a time, one small step...

Yet more lovely ideas to be thinking about and to be doing wish I'd written my first comment before l let myself get so down thank you

I'm so sorry! You are going through a really hard time and it must be very difficult to feel any motivation at all.
I've actually just been diagnosed with long Covid and am not feeling at my sparkling best. When I get off the sofa I wheeze and cough like someone on 60 Woodbines. Having been the one who took meals to sick folks, I am now on the receiving end! So I have had to think about what I can I do. Not gardening - and I'm missing it! But I have started going through my address book (and our church address book) and sending a cheerful card to people. Concentration is a challenge and I'm afraid all the sitting is going to result in a backside the size of Patagonia, but I'm ploughing on. Everyone likes a card through the post and it gives me some focus.

I see no reason why you can't at the very least, plant a couple of pots up with something flowering, that you can take with you.
Begin packing things that you don't use on a regular basis - as far as clothes go, perhaps halve the number of the ones in your wardrobe and pack, then you can wash and wear the remainder.
These days, the turn around for housing is often less than a month between allocation and moving, so even though it may not be happening for several months, whatever you can do between now and then will mean not such a rush when you do get the call especially if your husband is unable to help. Otherwise, make sure that you have time for the odd cup of tea or coffee and time to sit out in the sun on days like today.

Janburry - the uncertainty is the problem as this gives you choices - the choice to pack, the choice to garden, the choice to remain fed up and low. My advice is to categorise the packing into things you won't need until next winter and get them packed immediately because as you think you definitely won't spend another winter in your current place you won't need them. Make sure that you put detailed information on the sides of the boxes as to what's in and which cupboard, set of drawers the contents came from, an even what room they were in.

When you've done that stick with the thought that you might be where you are for six months - as a gardener you know that a lot happens to a garden in six months and you must get pleasure out of looking at it so continue with the garden - of course it's worth it, it's not the fact that you might leave a pretty garden for someone else to look it that should be on your mind, but rather providing yourself with something uplifting to look at for the new few months while you're waiting and dealing with the uncertainty. Good luck.

Have you tried offering any of your garden items on Freecycle and/or Freegle?

Many people would be extremely grateful for anything that you no longer want or need for your new home.

What about your current neighbours? You could put a table by your garden gate with a notice to tell people to 'Please Help Yourself!'

What always worries me about bungalows in hot weather is how you are able to have windows open at night? In summer I sometimes worry about having upstairs windows wide open never mind on the ground floor. It wasn’t a problem for my late mother as she was always cold (heating turned up to 30c in winter!). I don’t think I could cope though.

Any allotments where you are intending to go? You need other people in your life besides a spouse, you sound a real gardener, passionate and lovely! Make enquiries now and you could starting some cuttings and a cheeky transplant here and there!!

Janburry if you are waiting for a council bungalow don’t pack yet! You could have to undo them. I do agree with the decluttering though, get all your papers sorted. You could even sort out the photographs! The very best of luck, it will come eventually.

I’m feeling the same as you at the moment. We are moving Tuesday to a new home I haven’t even seen due to lockdown. We wanted a bungalow but unfortunately there are none available we can afford so I have in mind if the worst comes to worst we can have a stairlift. But...please think about starting to pack now, we’ve been at it all week and didn’t realise we had so much clutter that’s just not necessary. I wished I’d gone through things sooner as next week when we’ve moved I’ve got to unpack it all and find homes for it all, it is truly exhausting. I realise we all live with too much ‘stuff’ , if we go on holiday to stay in a cottage we manage fine on far less so I’m trying my best to be ruthless this time. Good luck and if you start packing and decluttering now I’m sure you’re new bungalow will follow shortly

If its a Housing Association Bungalow you are on the list for...you will be on the list for alot longer than 6 - 12 months believe me. Think about a couple of years...do you jnow how bad the housing lists are now....especially for Bugalows???

Agree with JaneR185 about keeping in weekly contact with the housing office, and try to build a relationship with someone there, so you don’t get forgotten. If you’re at a physical standstill then browse and plan for a few new things, maybe cushion covers or curtains to make the new place look bright. You could also build up a ‘contact’ tick list of who needs to be informed when you move, utilities, post office, bank, Benefits office, and bear in mind those who only write once a year, insurance, membership renewal etc. Also prepare cards or letters with envelopes ready to print out and go to family and friends, with the new address blank for now. You or one of your family could print it out when the time comes. A bit of advance thinking will save time and effort when you’ll be so busy anyway. In the meantime try to plan little treats for both of you so your life isn’t on hold as someone said earlier.

Just wondering if you are getting all you are entitled to.. If over pension age apply for Attendance Allowance. If under pension age apply for Personal Independent Payment. In both cases defo apply for Carers Allowance as you are DH carer

I would start packing what you don’t use everyday, just leave the essentials so if you suddenly get somewhere you don’t have a terrific rush.

I am in a H A sheltered flat. Flat and building OK BUT I am unable to leave the building if I am alone. There are 6 very heavy fire doors which I cannot hold open and get my wheelchair through, because of shielding I do not have any visitors so cannot get out. I havent been out in over a year. I have joined the council housing list and have been on it for over 3 years, nothing suitable, and the properties I have requested I have not been chosen. I will also have the problem of effecting the move if and when I am lucky enough to find somewhere. there is absolutely no way I can pack and unpack for myself, I will need curtains taking down, light fittings, pictures removed and then need it all putting up in the new place. Nightmare.

SooozedaFlooze

Just wondering if you are getting all you are entitled to.. If over pension age apply for Attendance Allowance. If under pension age apply for Personal Independent Payment. In both cases defo apply for Carers Allowance as you are DH carer

OP has said she is a pensioner, so she will not be able to claim carer's allowance.

Op as others have said, it my be be a long wait.
does it have to be a bungalow, or would you consider a flat in a sheltered scheme. they often have a garden area that you might be able to cultivate if that is your interest.
there is more availability in flats, council, housing assn, almshouses/charities.
good luck.

I an in the process of moving in the next few weeks.there are cardboard boxes everywhere. And one that says charity shop items.I been told to put everything away that I don't really use and I have.all that's left is the living room stuff and some kitchen stuff.all is packed away.how do you know that won't gave a garden with a bungalowbungalow?