Am I being too sensitive

My SIL stopped getting a gift for my son when he turned 18. He didn’t know that she wasn’t getting him any more presents until the following year when she sent a card and said you’re too old now. He was a bit disappointed because the expectation of a gift was there. If she’d have told him on his 18th that’s it no more he would have accepted it without a problem. I made sure that when we gave gifts to others children we always made it known when giving a final gift this was the last one so that they wouldn’t expect anything. It wasn’t the value of the gift it was the way it was done that was upsetting.

i think it's a mistake to try to make others responsible for our actions.
we choose what we want to do.
and we can re-visit that choice.
just take ownership for your own decisions.
i doubt children will even notice who gives them what, or care.
they just want loads of things; it's about things not nuances of relationships.
so don't worry, just stop. nor do they care for cards.
maybe join a subscription service for singing and dancing celebratory emails.
they'll probably enjoy that more than cards.

I want to stop gifting to my great nieces and nephews, but feel guilty and wonder what they will think?

I simply do not understand why you should feel even a twinge of guilt let alone care a toss what they think.

It is your decision about what you want to do with your money. So if money is tight, stop doing it, it is clear that they feel no need to reciprocate your generousity. Do you ever get thank you letters from your great nieces and nephews. I suspect not.

Believe me, you are giving these presents because you want to do so, not because the recipients expect them or will be disappointed if they do not arrive. Deal with thinking out what drives you to cont1inue this one-sided generousity then concentrate on your own grandchild in the way your brother concentrates all his money on his.

I agree you should stop giving, as your finances are reduced.
Don't hold a grudge against your brother, tho.

I say this lovingly, because I truly feel for you, not meaning to sound mean - but you give out of choice because you're a generous and kind person. You shouldn't give if it's in the expectation of getting back, like for like, only give if it seems right and you actively want to.

In fact, I think it's past time for you to stop giving to his children/grandchildren and to him, himself.

Firstly, it no longer gives you pleasure to do so; it simply hurts you when your generosity is not reciprocated.

Secondly, your circumstances are much restricted from before you relied on a pension, and you will want to use what you can spare for your own child/ren and coming grandchild.

I wouldn't wory about what your great nieces and nephews will think - have a short word or write a wee note to your brother explaining very briefly that in your current circumstances you can no longer afford to give gifts to extended family, and ask him to explain it to his lot.

Best wishes and I hope you have great times with your coming grandchild.

Well I had a similar situation with my brother, I always bought his children nice presents, but he often wouldn’t bother at all with mine, or they would get some bit of rubbish three months later.
So one year, I got fed up and just stopped.
I regret it now though, it wasn’t their faults, I think I should have been the bigger person and carried on buying them nice things.
I don’t feel I behaved very well over it.

Just stop. Cards only from now on.