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AIBU

AIBU to feel really offended by this?

(67 Posts)
sazz1 Tue 21-Sep-21 17:07:25

I read an interview with an Afghanistan refugee who worked as a CEO for the former government. His family has been brought to England for safety and put in a hotel awaiting housing. That's fine I am pleased we are caring for refugees.
But he had several complaints.
He's being rehoused in Scotland and wanted London to help him getting a job in an executive position.
His documents will take a few months before he can open a bank account, get a car, look for a job etc.
A colleague of his was sent to Germany where he's only a pizza delivery driver now. Etc etc.
He said he's worried about friends still in danger in Afghanistan.
My point is he's safe here, neighbours are friendly invited his family to meals, barbeques etc.
We have people using food banks, sleeping on the streets, children going without meals. He's being well cared for but expects the same standard of living he had previously.
I'm very offended by that. At least he's safe from the Taliban as is his friend in Germany. Surely he should be counting his blessings that his family are all safe, have food, a roof over their heads and friendly neighbours not moaning about being rehoused in Scotland.
What do others think?

Esspee Tue 21-Sep-21 17:23:15

It must be very difficult for him. I hope his family do well here.

Ilovecheese Tue 21-Sep-21 17:37:43

He may be suffering some sort of trauma, and will be easy to manipulate into saying things that journalists know will stoke up anger, because it makes good copy.
He also may not know about the levels of poverty in this country.

Riverwalk Tue 21-Sep-21 17:38:49

Can you please give a link to the interview so I can read it before commenting.

I have read about doctors, engineers and other professionals who are frustrated that they are not allowed to work/undertake training for years whilst paperwork is sorted out. They didn't want to be on benefits. Maybe this person was thinking along these lines?

NotSpaghetti Tue 21-Sep-21 17:39:00

I think when we have put people at risk we have a wider responsibility than just housing and feeding them.

I'm sure he's relieved to be out and knows what could have happened (especially following the dangerous data breach). I think he is counting his blessings! Who wouldn't - but I also think he's ok for him to have misgivings about his lack of choices.

We got him out because it was our duty. We should now expend some energy helping him establish himself here.

Hetty58 Tue 21-Sep-21 17:42:22

Why are you offended? Does he have to be eternally grateful for what he's got?

NotSpaghetti Tue 21-Sep-21 17:43:45

I expect it is THIS article:

www.google.com/amp/s/www.standard.co.uk/insider/diary-afghan-refugee-uk-government-support-b954064.html%3famp

NotSpaghetti Tue 21-Sep-21 17:48:01

Here's an article with a list of ways to help:

www.standard.co.uk/insider/how-you-can-support-afghan-refugee-families-in-the-uk-b954426.html

Lincslass Tue 21-Sep-21 17:51:29

Another side to the delivery driver story, if this is what he is referring too, a previous Government Minister, now pleased to be residing in Germany, infoglitz.com/indonesiaeng/the-story-of-the-former-minister-of-afghanistan-working-as-a-food-delivery-driver-in-germany/
.

Lucca Tue 21-Sep-21 17:52:59

Having read the article I’d say yes you are being unreasonable. He is just pointing out difficulties. He expresses gratitude as well.

Lincslass Tue 21-Sep-21 17:58:26

Riverwalk

Can you please give a link to the interview so I can read it before commenting.

I have read about doctors, engineers and other professionals who are frustrated that they are not allowed to work/undertake training for years whilst paperwork is sorted out. They didn't want to be on benefits. Maybe this person was thinking along these lines?

These things take time though. A friend emigrated to Australia, no I know it’s not the same, but further exams to see if she was fit to practice, and get her papers registered. We just cannot accept a qualification on a say so, we cannot magic places in London, unfortunately this is all they seem to want, there are better and other places that maybe need good business heads, his qualifications would not be accepted by any other country without proof of same. There are good programmes to obtain credentials, to be able to work as a Dr etc in the UK.

sazz1 Tue 21-Sep-21 18:08:49

Notspaghetti has the link to the article above.
I don't expect him to be eternally grateful but people are dying in Afghanistan so surely he shouldn't be moaning about his life and presumed prospects here after just a few weeks. If I was in his position I would be very happy in a hotel as opposed to refugees in tent camps in other countries.

welbeck Tue 21-Sep-21 18:09:30

it is natural to want to go where other fellow nationals are living.
wouldn't you want the same if you had to suddenly flee to an unfamiliar country.

NotSpaghetti Tue 21-Sep-21 18:11:23

I think the idea that he gets 4 months help but his papers will probably take 4 months is not very clever. Personally.

Lucca Tue 21-Sep-21 18:28:34

sazz1

Notspaghetti has the link to the article above.
I don't expect him to be eternally grateful but people are dying in Afghanistan so surely he shouldn't be moaning about his life and presumed prospects here after just a few weeks. If I was in his position I would be very happy in a hotel as opposed to refugees in tent camps in other countries.

He is not, in my opinion, moaning .

Riverwalk Tue 21-Sep-21 18:47:48

These things take time though

Indeed they do Lincslass , as they should, but from what I've read it takes an inordinate amount of time to process refugees, and in that time they are not even supposed to take on any work.

Such a waste of talent and resources that we could do with!

lemongrove Tue 21-Sep-21 18:52:00

sazz1

Notspaghetti has the link to the article above.
I don't expect him to be eternally grateful but people are dying in Afghanistan so surely he shouldn't be moaning about his life and presumed prospects here after just a few weeks. If I was in his position I would be very happy in a hotel as opposed to refugees in tent camps in other countries.

Actually I agree with you, it’s such early days and you don’t expect carping in that situation.

Lincslass Tue 21-Sep-21 20:11:05

Riverwalk

^These things take time though^

Indeed they do Lincslass , as they should, but from what I've read it takes an inordinate amount of time to process refugees, and in that time they are not even supposed to take on any work.

Such a waste of talent and resources that we could do with!

Yes I agree, they should be allowed to do some work, but not sure how it would work. Looking at how other countries handle this, as their is no obligation under the Refugee Convention to allow asylum seekers to work according to this
www.migrationwatchuk.org/briefing-paper/4.24?back=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com%2Fsearch%3Fclient%3Dsafari%26as_qdr%3Dall%26as_occt%3Dany%26safe%3Dactive%26as_q%3DWhich+country+allows+asylum+seekers+to+work+while+their+papers+are+being+processed%26channel%3Daplab%26source%3Da-app1%26hl%3Den

Callistemon Tue 21-Sep-21 20:26:26

sazz1 it is not just refugees who are not allowed to work in the professions in which they qualified.
A relative who came here from Australia was unable to work here as a medical professional without taking a further degree and passing an examination in the English language (all at her own expense).

MayBeMaw Tue 21-Sep-21 20:36:54

Sounds like a case of “damned if they do and damned if the don’t ”
If they can’t work , if skills and qualifications are ignored, they are in danger of being accused of sponging off the society which took them in. The sooner they can work/earn/support their families/pay their taxes/contribute to the economy, the sooner they can integrate and show their gratitude for their asylum in this country in a meaningful way.
There is a huge difference between political refugees and economic refugees who seek a better standard of living and are unlikely to be highly qualified.
The Afghan refugees may have come with nothing, but may equally have left a professional life behind them, comfortably off with high aspirations for their children.
I see no reason why anybody writing on this forum can justify feeling “offended”

Bussy Tue 21-Sep-21 20:38:12

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Alegrias1 Tue 21-Sep-21 20:42:50

This is going well, isn't it?

OP, YABU

FindingNemo15 Tue 21-Sep-21 21:17:57

Surely initially he should be grateful he got out and be thinking about for poor people in danger that are left behind.

It is early days, he has food and shelter so should not expect to run before he can walk.

I agree with the OP if homes can be found for him why can't they be found for our homeless and more help be given to ex-servicemen?

Hetty58 Tue 21-Sep-21 21:28:08

sazz1: 'he shouldn't be moaning about his life and presumed prospects here after just a few weeks' - perhaps he's just trying to fit in with British culture? After all, we're a nation of complainers!

Zoejory Tue 21-Sep-21 22:01:39

Really offended? Really?

The man will be in a state of panic. Their world has totally disintegrated. Three young children who have lost everything they know. They are in a foreign country and not knowing what they are doing or where they'll be going.

I didn't read the article in the same way as you must have done. I didn't see much moaning going on. He sounded grateful. He also sounded worried. Which I think we all would be in his shoes.

I'm grateful you posted about this as I'd been wondering how the refugees have been coping since they arrived.