Calling adult sisters 'the girls'

I HATE being referred to as a "girl". I don't think it is just single women that get called this. You often hear couples say things like "lets leave the girls to shop and go to the bar" or "he went out with the boys last night". No one over the age of 30 should be called a girl or a boy. It is patronising!

NanaPlenty

Trisha 123 - I’m with you. Good Lord surely there are better things to worry about. Again not said to upset anyone. I call my children ‘the girls’ they are adults and don’t think anything of it . It’s just a term of endearment if anything. Generally people seem to get het up over such small things these days ?

I imagine there are better things to worry about than many many of the things discussed on this forum.
In real life do you only get irritated by and chat about very serious issues?

Names are important. I don't expect they would like to be called 'Miss....' either..When my Mother received letters in the sixties she was sometimes referred to as 'Mrs' and then my Father's initials and surname. All wrong I think. An older friend of my daughter's calls herself 'Granny' to my grandchildren. I'm too polite to say I hate that!

I call my adult daughters, girls' and they don't seem to mind.

I regularly meet with a group of female ex-colleagues for lunch. The oldest is 91 and we are known as 'X's Girls'. One of the main reasons for meeting is that X doesn't have much of a social life and by by naming the group after her, she is thrilled to bits. The addition of 'girls' is recognition that we are all female and hopefully, have not yet lost the Joie de Vivre that young girls have!

'X's women' doesn't quite have the same cachet!

I think it's a fuss over nothing. I would love to be referred to as a girl. It's quite sweet actually.

A bunch of us, all schoolmates once upon a long time ago, speak of one another as girls. Some of us are married, some are single, and a couple are nuns... What's in a name? That which you put in it.

Girls and boys are words that have taken on a different meaning - they no longer refer only to the younger versions of men and women but are much more thought of as female and male - girls’ and boys’ nights out are phrases used to differentiate between the sexes and not to make a comment on age so I don’t think it’s unreasonable to anybody to be referred to as a girl or a boy - but of course if that offends them then they should say.

There are times and places where things are acceptable and there are others when they are not. I have no objections to being one of the girls at home - mum has 4 of us. However, I am a senior manager fast approaching 60, last week I took exception in a meeting when one of my male peers said "Xxxx (young male recent entrant) and the girls have worked really hard on this". It belittled us and our contribution, without which the whole project would have crashed and burned, as the person concerned had over egged their CV and was out of their depth. We can be referred to as a group, or individually - to speak of us in this way sent out a clear, and clearly wrong, message. I started my career speaking out about this type of thing, it is a great disappointment that I am still having to do it at the end. The only difference is I have worked my way up a bit so I am "shouting" across rather than upwards.

I think too many people think up ways to be aggrieved.

I might start using the local terms - quines and loons.

I have a group of girlfriends, we meet for lunch every 6 weeks or so, we’ve known each other 25yrs and we always refer to Girlies Lunch in our diaries…….

katy1950

I love being called the girls it makes me feel young

Absolutely!me and DH refer to each other as "babe" and " Hun" or any other daft term currently used by generation tik tok!!! We think it's hilarious the daft things they think of , and it makes us have a bit of a giggle, strictly behind closed doors of course, I slipped up and yelled "babe" once in Morrisons, red face ensued.......

Ha ha! Get over yourself. It. General term in case of possible mixed company , it covers all bases.dont be so stuffy!

It's a real term of endearment coming from parents , and usually an downright insult from anyone else in my opinion.my dad used it all time with me and sis.mum used our names!

Yet there are plenty of people on this thread getting het up about other people reactions to the word, surely they have better things to worry about too.

Trisha 123 - I’m with you. Good Lord surely there are better things to worry about. Again not said to upset anyone. I call my children ‘the girls’ they are adults and don’t think anything of it . It’s just a term of endearment if anything. Generally people seem to get het up over such small things these days ?

An irritation for me is:-
When someone says, “Hi guys or are you guys coming?” Please stop calling girls/females/women/ladies, the name ‘guys’. I’m not a guy.

My mother referred to my sister andme as a girl all her life and I was 55 when she died, and my sister 40.!

I disliked it, because it wasn't just something she said. Her attitude clearlyl showed that our opinions on practically anything were less well-informed than hers.

This to me is the point - if you feel you are still being treated as a school-girl years after you are grown up then it rankles, irrespective of whether it is connected to being called a girl or not.

DH and I continue to refer to our daughters, both in their 50s, as the girls (as in "we must tell the girls about.."). It's the most natural way for us to speak about them between ourselves. And it's neater and shorter than "we must tell Gertrude and Lavinia about.."). We don't refer to them as "the girls" when speaking to other people - we say "our daughters".

But men are often referred to as 'the boys'.

I always refer to my 3 daughters as ‘the girls’ and obviously, individually, by their name. One DD has 2 sons and 2 stepsons known as the ‘little boys’ and the ‘big boys’. No one minds and I’m sure they’d all let it be known if they did! I’m in a group of 5 friends referred to as the ‘girls’. I don’t mind.

Galaxy

I don't know about you but I can think about what to have for tea and the issues relating to the pandemic within the same hour. It's possible to think about a tange of things minor and major.

I agree. There are things that mildly irritate people, things that annoy them, and things that worry them a great deal. The fact that they become mildly irritated about one thing doesn't mean they aren't seriously worried about something else

So if the original question is directed at me yes, I have huge worries and sadness in my life at the moment. Which is probably why I welcome some idle debate about non serious but slightly annoying stuff.

I remember my mum referring to her friends as the girls. That to me was very strange being the youngster I was ?! My DD and DS always refer to their daughters as the girls even though they’re now adults and I see absolutely nothing wrong with it. I refer to my friends as the girls as well. Can’t believe anyone could be upset by it personally. There are far worse things to worry about!!

If they don't like it they should just ask not to be called that.
It is, however, a very common thing to say and I think most people would not be bothered by it. Myself included.

Be grateful they aren't 'the old girls'. (Actually, they probably are, out of their hearing.)