Gransnet forums

AIBU

Sitting on my own at theatre

(123 Posts)
Beswitched Sun 07-Nov-21 10:40:54

I don't know if I'm being a bit childish here.
I arranged to go to the theatre with 3 friends on Friday. As we were at the theatre door I realised I'd left my covid certificate in the car. I told the others to go on in while I ran back to get it. When I arrived back in, a person we know, who had come on her own, was sitting in my seat.

I assumed she'd just come over to say hello, but when the play was about to start she said 'oh the other seat is just back there' pointing to a seat several rows behind. Not only was it not as good a seat as the ones I'd booked (although same price) but it also meant I was sat on my own. However the lights were going down so I just went quickly to the seat.

There were three short plays being shown with a 5 minute interval in between and I could see them chatting away during those intervals while I was just sitting there on my own.

At the end this woman called over to me "we're going for a quick drink in the bar, do you want to come?".
The other two made an apologetic face behind her back and one of them texted me yesterday.

AIBU to feel this woman was cheeky and rude in her behaviour.

Sago Sun 07-Nov-21 10:44:29

Very rude!
Although I’m surprised your friends didn’t explain to her that it was your seat.

Sparklefizz Sun 07-Nov-21 10:44:56

No, you're not being unreasonable at all. I am cross on your behalf just reading your post.

monk08 Sun 07-Nov-21 10:44:59

No you are not. If it was me I'd have said well go sit in it then because that's my seat.

Daisymae Sun 07-Nov-21 10:48:21

Yes, you should have asked for your seat back. Some people have a thick skin!

maddyone Sun 07-Nov-21 10:50:11

How very dare she? You should have told her firmly that the seat she was occupying was your seat, and asked her to return to her own seat. What a cheek!!!

Beswitched Sun 07-Nov-21 10:50:37

I would have said something but the lights were going down and the play was about to start.

highlanddreams Sun 07-Nov-21 10:51:54

I would have have stood up to her and tod her to go sit in it, this seat was yours.
I'm at the age now where I won't accept this kind of behaviour, that was your seat & your friends should have stopped her sitting there too

J52 Sun 07-Nov-21 10:52:37

I’m not surprised you’re upset. Not only was it extremely rude of the interloper, but your friends should have said something.
Unfortunately, these things do happen in friendship groups, even when they’re all adults.

FannyCornforth Sun 07-Nov-21 10:53:19

Unbelievable!
Did you enjoy the play Beswitched?
It would have ruined it for me, I would have been fuming throughout, and unable to concentrate on anything else!
I think that sometimes someone is so rude, and it’s so bizarre and unexpected that you don’t know how to react at the time.
I think that this may have happened in this case.

AGAA4 Sun 07-Nov-21 10:54:33

What a very rude woman. I think I would have had to say that this was the seat I booked and I presume yours is somewhere else.

cornergran Sun 07-Nov-21 10:55:16

Very bad behaviour. I hope she’s not classed as a friend of yours and the people you went with are suitably ashamed for not telling this person the seat was yours.

Beswitched Sun 07-Nov-21 10:56:44

@fannycornforth No unfortunately I didn't enjoy it as much as I should.

My friends were caught off guard as well. One of them made a pointed remark about the good seats Beswitched chose for us, but it apparently went over her head.

25Avalon Sun 07-Nov-21 10:58:13

Maybe your friends did say something and she just rode over them in a rude arrogant overbearing manner. What a horrible woman. It’s no wonder you are hurt, upset, annoyed and angry. URNBU

Witzend Sun 07-Nov-21 10:58:45

Your friends should have put her straight! I certainly would have - politely enough - but very firmly.

MayBee70 Sun 07-Nov-21 10:59:51

That was awful. No wonder you’re upset. Now, I’ve often been to the theatre or cinema on my own if there’s something I really want to see but this is a different kettle of fish. How upsetting for you. The other people should have been more forceful but in situations like this we don’t like to make a scene do we?

NanaPlenty Sun 07-Nov-21 11:01:09

Rude and hurtful. Hope you are ok.😘

Nonogran Sun 07-Nov-21 11:14:15

What disloyal friends you’ve got! Why didn’t they point out to the usurper that she should move out?
At first opportunity I would have got a member of theatre staff to move the woman back to her seat.
Lessons learned; stick up for yourself in future, whatever the circumstances.

Jaxjacky Sun 07-Nov-21 11:14:31

Not being unreasonable at all, how very rude and selfish.

Enid101 Sun 07-Nov-21 11:16:00

I’m a bit confused here. You say you went with three friends so did you book four seats together and this lady had booked her own seat a few rows back then expected you to sit in her seat? If so she was very unreasonable and I would have asked the staff to get her to move after the first play. I’d be disappointed in my friends too. So sorry she spoilt the trip for you.

Nell8 Sun 07-Nov-21 11:16:16

Talk about "brass neck"!! I'd have been fuming. You are in no way being childish.
I've had the experience of being usurped in a similar way and must admit I still nurse a grudge, which I need to address before it festers, but how?
I hope what they say is right and time does heal thanks

Aveline Sun 07-Nov-21 11:19:23

Well what a nerve! Obviously it's too late but I would still have insisted on getting my own seat that I'd booked and paid for although I'm sure that would have been very awkward at the time.
You should ask her for an apology though so she gets the message and won't do it again. I'm not impressed by your friends either. Sorry. I know it's easy to say this after the event and about a stranger but I'm incensed on your behalf.

Shelflife Sun 07-Nov-21 11:21:58

You have every right to be angry about this ! It was a very difficult situation and impossible to stand your corner when the play was about to start. No doubt your friends were embarrassed, but should really have put this woman right. Some people are so thick skinned - unbelievable!! Hope you are feeling a bit better now and you enjoyed the plays.

Lincslass Sun 07-Nov-21 11:23:50

Really, with friends like yours you don’t need enemies, as the saying goes. One wonders why they didn’t tell this woman it was your seat, I certainly would have done. Awful for you.

asd123 Sun 07-Nov-21 11:27:15

I am fuming on your behalf,the cheek of her and why didnt your friends say this is our friends paid for seat she has just gone to get her covid cert and will be back in a min,they could have also draped a coat or bag on the seat while you was gone to show the seat was taken.
To then ask if you would like to come for drinks as if you were the add on,utter utter cheek