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To still be bereft

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Knittingnovice Mon 28-Mar-22 16:20:25

You're being too hard on yourself. Not only are you grieving, you're possibly feeling guilty as you couldn't help. Even though you done all you legally allowed to, it doesn't take away the guilt.

You haven't had a chance to say goodbye either as lockdown prevented this.

One and half years is not enough time to get over your husband. Please be kind to yourself.

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Amberheart Mon 28-Mar-22 16:11:21

My dh died 1 1/2 years ago. He had Azheimer's and was in long term care. When covid hit (I live in Canada) long term care homes were locked down. I would call him but he didn't understand why I couldn't visit. I eventually had 1 window visit and 2 distanced visits. Then an outbreak occurred in his home. Lockdown again. A couple of weeks later he fell and died 2 weeks later. I was allowed in to see him but he didn't recognize me. At one point he asked me to help him and I couldn't.

We had been together for 39 years. He'd always been there for me through good and bad and yet I couldn't help him. His words haunt me now. I know I need to be strong and carry on but I still grieve for him. I can't even throw away the passcard for his care home.

I know IABU to still be grieving. Sorry for the long post but I just feel so bereft.

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