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AIBU

Outdoor shoes - on or off?

(177 Posts)
NannyB2604 Mon 20-Jun-22 12:44:45

Just wondering what others think or do. Is it ever acceptable to ask someone to take their outdoor shoes off when coming into your house? Or should you (as I do at present) hope for the best and grin and bear it if they don't? We have beige carpets throughout (there when we bought the house) and can't afford (don't want) to replace them with something more practical at least for the time being. Any opinions on this?

Margiknot Sun 08-Jan-23 11:46:29

I would not usually ask for people to remove their shoes, but if their shoes were muddy and for what ever reason they did not think to remove them (my son has friends with learning disability who need support) I would gently request removal. I think most people would automatically remove muddy shoes or boots anyway. We have mostly hard floors downstairs, so it is not critical to remove shoes here.

Elrel Fri 20-Jan-23 00:01:44

Abitbarmy
Absolutely - there are worse things on pavements than dust, or even mud!
I wish I could remember the study about harmful organisms brought in on shoes. Door mats reduced the number but a lot still got into the house.

Kim19 Fri 20-Jan-23 07:37:45

Whatever suits the host is fine by me.

DaisyAnne Fri 20-Jan-23 12:26:49

I was recently asked by a friend of 45 years to remove my shoes. I had driven from my house to hers. My fur lined shoes were clean. She has never asked me before.

I have neuropathy and my feet (and hands) can get very, very cold. I also have arthritis in my knee so taking them on and off is not easy.

However, I did as I was asked but will not do so again. I have put some plastic shoe covers in my handbag as this can obviously come out of no where.

I would never ask anyone to do this and wasn't brought up to ask guests to do it. I find it lacking in manners as it appears to think nothing of the comfort of your guest. My feet were freezing when I left.

I expect friend and I will go out for coffee in future hmm

Fleurpepper Fri 20-Jan-23 12:47:41

I always offer to take my shoes off, and do as I am bid. And when people offer to take theirs when they come to me, I just say 'no, we live here' and smile.

Grantanow Thu 09-Feb-23 09:49:18

Walking around in socks does lead to darning.

aggie Thu 09-Feb-23 10:02:04

Walking around in sweaty socks is a bit off putting , walking around in nylon is slippy , bare feet ! I stubbed my toes , thought I had broken it , wonderful coloured toes for weeks . Wearing slippers provided by mine host , not hygienic ,
Most older people need the support of their shoes
Are plastic overshoes slippery?

ExperiencedNotOld Thu 09-Feb-23 10:17:33

I will always offer to take my shoes off if going into a carpeted area - or if they’re wet/dirty. It’s polite.
What I find curious about some of the above posts is where they ‘insist’ that people remove their shoes. What a welcome! Suffering judgement due to a choice of carpet colour! It’s come on in at ours, albeit welly wearers will automatically taken theirs off.
I recall being told of someone someone suffering a severe foot rash by walking barefoot on an overly shake&vac’d carpet.

Wyllow3 Thu 09-Feb-23 11:12:38

For me, it only depends if its bad weather or muddy boots as my carpet is terracotta.

If I go to a house where its "shoes off" in pale carpet areas then I follow their rules.

micmc47 Sat 11-Feb-23 16:28:11

I worked in Sweden for several years, where it was standard practice to remove outdoor shoes as you came in, and add them to the "shoe shrine" adjacent to the door. I think that this was partly because so many homes have polished wooden floors, which could be scratched by rough soles, particularly during the long Winter months when so much rock salt is about. As regard U.K., I usually continue to wear my outdoor shoes around our carpeted house, and wouldn't dream of asking a visitor to remove theirs. If they choose to take them off without being asked, that's OK with me.

Granmarderby10 Sat 11-Feb-23 16:37:43

One shoe off and one shoe 👟 on, hey diddle dumpling, my son John ….couldn’t resist

StoneofDestiny Thu 13-Apr-23 00:00:19

I don't have pets and have cream carpets throughout my home. I can't see the problem asking people to remove outdoor shoes - it's not like your asking them to walk on hot coals.

Oreo Thu 13-Apr-23 08:39:45

kittylester

I wouldn't dream of asking people to take their shoes off. I do always ask in other people's homes.

Same here.
Sometimes visitors offer to take shoes off, if it’s dry and sunny I say it’s fine, if bad weather I say thanks.

Oreo Thu 13-Apr-23 08:42:01

DaisyAnne

I was recently asked by a friend of 45 years to remove my shoes. I had driven from my house to hers. My fur lined shoes were clean. She has never asked me before.

I have neuropathy and my feet (and hands) can get very, very cold. I also have arthritis in my knee so taking them on and off is not easy.

However, I did as I was asked but will not do so again. I have put some plastic shoe covers in my handbag as this can obviously come out of no where.

I would never ask anyone to do this and wasn't brought up to ask guests to do it. I find it lacking in manners as it appears to think nothing of the comfort of your guest. My feet were freezing when I left.

I expect friend and I will go out for coffee in future hmm

Difficult if it’s a friend tho, take slippers with you next time?

pascal30 Thu 13-Apr-23 09:05:51

It's off always for myself within my home as I have pale carpets but I would not ask visitors. Most offer, especially trades people and friends but I'd never make someone feel uncomfortable or say anything if a visitor didn't initiate it.

Primrose53 Thu 13-Apr-23 09:39:55

Most of my friends who visit just do it automatically because presumably they do so in their own homes. If people arrive at the side door they then come through the lobby to the kitchen. That is tiled so I don’t mind if they keep their shoes on.

We bought new carpets for the hall, stairs and lounge last Sept and when I chose what I wanted the salesman said “you have chosen the most expensive carpet in the shop” (trust me). It was very expensive so I definitely wouldn’t want people wearing outdoor shoes in there.

My OH does work for a woman who lives in like a mini stately home and in her hall she has a row of pixie slippers in every size for visitors as she has white carpets throughout!

GrannySomerset Fri 14-Apr-23 13:38:21

I can’t think of anything more inhospitable than very pale carpets which require shoe removal. Late DH had to have help with putting on shoes and would have been so mortified by not being allowed in without removing his. I just say “we aren’t precious about carpets” and am glad to see all and any visitors. Life is too short to devote to a white carpet!

Primrose53 Fri 14-Apr-23 16:12:18

GrannySomerset

I can’t think of anything more inhospitable than very pale carpets which require shoe removal. Late DH had to have help with putting on shoes and would have been so mortified by not being allowed in without removing his. I just say “we aren’t precious about carpets” and am glad to see all and any visitors. Life is too short to devote to a white carpet!

Her house, her rules but I wouldn’t want white carpets either TBH. I guess if people don’t want to wear the pixie boots they choose not to visit again.

Norah Fri 14-Apr-23 16:56:34

We'd never ask anyone aside a child to remove shoes (they all have slippers here), however we always remove shoes in other homes. Polite.

Tenko Fri 14-Apr-23 17:07:08

As a family we remove our shoes on entering the house and use slippers. My AC have grown up with this and remove their shoes in other peoples houses as do myself and Dh . Some friends and family say don’t bother . But I have a few very house proud friends and I do it automatically.

DamaskRose Fri 14-Apr-23 17:37:09

My immediate family always remove their shoes and we do in theirs, but I would dream of asking anyone else. I always offer but am rarely (can’t think of one occasion!) taken up on it. My sitting room carpet is a nightmare to keep clean but heigh ho, I’d rather have the visitors!

CanadianGran Fri 14-Apr-23 20:59:16

It's an automatic to take shoes off when entering a house here.

I think because of our long winters it just developed into a cultural habit. I will tell people not to bother, but most do anyway.

I'm curious about when you put them on and take them off - as soon as you get up , and when you go to bed? I think this is worthy of a new thread.

TillyTrotter Fri 14-Apr-23 21:09:57

We ask workmen to remove their boots or put those plastic covers over their shoes, our family remove their shoes and keep slippers here.
I have quite a collection of slippers of all sizes for friends and family and noone has a problem with it. I find most people offer, and it has never been an issue.
Similarly we take our slippers to the homes of others.

Primrose53 Fri 14-Apr-23 21:43:48

We once had a Rep here by appointment. He turned up with his slippers in a bag. Never seen that before or since. I do know he was here nearly all evening and I began to wonder if the next thing he’d fetch out of his bag were his pyjamas.

TillyTrotter Fri 14-Apr-23 21:50:32

😁😁